Dina Martina & Matt Smith
(THEATER) On the Boards presents two unique performers in a double-decker format: In the spacious top bunk is Dina Martina, the alter ego of Grady West. Dina is a supposed Las Vegas legend of no particular talent, but she transcends the usual "so-bad-it's-funny" stuff--somehow, her narcissism and abuse of the English language transform into a lampooning assault on everything our culture holds sacred. Meanwhile, in the intimate downstairs, Matt Smith turns a faux parenting seminar into a three-ring circus of comically passive-aggressive behavior. Both shows promise to be both unsettling and funny, a delicious combination. BRET FETZER
On the Boards, 100 W Roy, 217-9888. $12 Thurs/Sun, $14 Fri/Sat. Both shows play Thurs-Sun at 8. Through Dec 17. [Note: Bret Fetzer is Matt Smith's director.]
WTO Documentaries
(FILMS) Armchair activists, unite! There are no less than three WTO documentaries in town this weekend for your mediated revisiting pleasure. To my tastes, the standout is Russ Thompson's 30 Frames a Second, the least didactic and most artistically complex of the three. This Is What Democracy Looks Like and Trade Off are somewhat more predictable, functioning as entry-level introductions to the event by mixing commentary from luminaries (such as the charismatic Mike Dolan of Public Citizen) with street-level footage. If you missed the real thing, you'll want to see all three. If you were there... aw, hell, go anyway, remember your moment in the sun. JAMIE HOOK
See Movie Times for details.
twosome
(DANCE) BetterBiscuitDance's last show, FEAST (a collaboration with glass bones ensemble), featured a giant seesaw-like platform tilting to and fro. Their new piece doesn't sound quite so spectacular, but promises to contain a wide selection of moods and rhythms. Built around the seasons (spring, summer, etc., not Thanksgiving and Christmas), twosome tackles such varied topics as sibling rivalry, self-imposed limits, vanity and ambition, and loss and distance. Each piece will have its own vocabulary of movement and gesture, but all will reflect the kinetic and emotional work of co-artistic directors Freya Wormus and Alex Martin. BRET FETZER
Chamber Theatre, 915 E Pine, Fourth Floor, 722-7983. $12 general, $10 students/seniors. Thurs-Sun at 8. Through Dec 3.
Jason Trachtenburg
(MUSIC) Jason Trachtenburg has been around for some time, performing quirky, character-oriented songs that fuse irony and heartfelt emotion. But he hit some kind of nerve when he began buying vintage slides at estate sales and writing songs about the contents, such as "Mountain Trip to Japan" and a particularly brilliant mini-rock-opera about a marketing seminar. He'll be performing all of these slideshow escapades at this release party for his new CD, supported by one of Seattle's finest six-year-old drummers, his daughter Rachel. Also on the lineup: Jenn Wood, the Giraffes, plus free homemade tamales for the first 200 patrons. BRET FETZER
Breakroom, 1325 E Madison, 860-5155, 8:30 pm, $6.
Skin So Thick
(ART) Jennifer West's Skin So Thick video-installation series uses blown-up, slowed-down images of hardware pushing through layers of latex and wood to create a world of dangerous surfaces. In this work, in each of 911's five storefront windows, coils fight their way through the chewy, variable latex, and the force of their effort is so tangible you can almost taste it. The installation, like all of West's work, isn't just clever, but also references issues of dimensionality and abstract erotics, making it a great drive-by for a first date. EMILY HALL
911 Media Arts Center, 117 Yale Ave N, 682-6552. Viewable from about 9 pm until dawn or so, through Dec 10.
Cancel
(TO DO) Dump your subscription to The Seattle Times and the Seattle Post-Intelligencer. The newspaper management has clearly negotiated in bad faith over a new contract--if you can even call it negotiating. And disregard the warped media coverage surrounding the strike--it's not just a bunch of whining, well-paid reporters. It's also a bunch of low-paid, underappreciated employees who toil away in display advertisements, classifieds, and circulation. PHIL CAMPBELL
To cancel your Times or P-I subscription, call 464-2121. (If they won't take your phone call, drop papers off at the picket lines where striking workers will recycle them for you.)
Apes of Wrath
(WRESTLING PARTY) The last wrestling party I attended at the Rocket Science Studios--the only wrestling party I have ever attended--was as close to lunacy as I ever expect to find. A small ring, a drunken crowd, men and women wrestling together... sweet Jesus it was grand! A benefit for something called the "Monolith Project"--evidently a guerrilla art project--if this year's event is at all like the previous one, somebody is sure to end up naked, and chances are it won't be pretty. BRADLEY STEINBACHER
Rocket Science Studios, 1235 Westlake Ave N, 9 pm, donation.
Noel Barrett
(APPRAISALS) I don't mean to poop on something so great as the guy from Antiques Roadshow coming to Seattle, but really, antique toy appraisals? Is that it? What about the good antiques like chairs and music boxes and paintings and porcelain? Remember that Will and Grace episode when Jack and Grace brought in for appraisal the teapot she bought at the lesbian thrift store, specifically so they could make the disappointed face when it was revealed to be worthless, and it turned out to be worth thousands of dollars? Teapots, not toys. Oh well. KATHLEEN WILSON
Museum of History & Industry, 2700 24th Ave E, 324-1126. 11 am-1 pm, $25 adults, $15 children 12 and under.
melanieonline
(WEBSITE) Holy crap! Melanie Griffith is loco in the cabeza! Log on to her website and see for yourself. She's completely out of her gourd. Dig that dreamy music, those glamour shots of her as a goddess, her... rehab diary. Cuckoo! Cuckoo! And you can shop, too! BRADLEY STEINBACHER
www.melanieonline.com.
Farewell Ralph Munro
(RETIREMENT PARTY) Ignored by approximately everybody on earth until three and a half weeks ago, secretaries of state have emerged from Election 2000 as the unruly bad-asses of democracy, approving recounts, certifying results, and answering to nobody. Tonight is your chance to bid farewell to Ralph Munro and party down pursuant to Article III, Section 17 of the Washington State Constitution, as he celebrates his retirement after raising hell for 20 years as Washington's secretary of state. JASON PAGANO
Town Hall, Eighth and Seneca, 360-866-2382, 6 pm, $42 (send check to Retirement Gala, WWU Foundation, 120 State Ave #262, Olympia, WA 98501).
Happy Birthday Marion Zioncheck
(READING/LIVE MUSIC) In August of 1936, Marion Zioncheck--a young congressman elected to Seattle's First District--hurled himself from the fifth floor of downtown Seattle's Arctic Building, leaving behind a scrawled suicide note despairing of his inability to reform our wickedly inhumane capitalist system. The Stranger's Grant Cogswell, in his epic poem "Ode to Congressman Marion Zioncheck" (part two of his serial poem The Dream of the Cold War), has brilliantly memorialized this tragic event. At the same time, Cogswell has created a far-ranging mythology in which the congressman's short life becomes a symbolic anchor in a historical reckoning of political struggle in Seattle. Today is Zioncheck's 100th birthday, and Cogswell (who will be reciting his wonderful poem)--along with Automaton (formerly Automaton Adventure Series), Colin Spring, Mike Toschi, and the Cedar Crest High School Cheerleaders--is throwing a party for the dead lefty. RICK LEVIN
Breakroom, 1325 E Madison, 860-5155, 6 pm, $8. All ages!
Krogstad's Universe
(LECTURE) Karl Krogstad is a self-induced maniac, meaning that he has acted "eccentric" for so long that it has permanently warped his consciousness. He's annoying, grating, arrogant, and funny as hell, and his filmmaking career is the stuff of legend. He once plastered every city telephone pole with the simple, vain statement: "Karl Krogstad Makes Movies." He has made more of them in Seattle than any other filmmaker. WigglyWorld Studios finally pins the elusive Krogstad down for what promises to be a riotous filmmaker lecture. Krogstad will show clips from his numerous feature and short films (including The Gigabyte Trilogy, Eggnog, and Surrealism), and discuss his singular method. JAMIE HOOK
Little Theatre, 608 19th Ave E, 675-2055, 7 pm, $15.