March 21, 2012

Text from South Lake Union

Khaki-Clad Herds of Amazonians

Kelly O

Tools

Soon, somewhere in this neighborhood, Amazon will open its first brick-and-mortar bookstore, and it will look like an Apple Store mated with the paperback aisle at QFC.

Just in case you haven't noticed during this so-called digital literature revolution, the e-book and paper-and-paste best-seller lists are exactly the same. There has been no changing of the guard among brand-name authors and no Walt Whitman self-publishing an eccentric classic. Digital literature is only the capitalistic exploitation of our consumerist desires to be exactly like our neighbors. In other words, Amazon is as old-fashioned and predictable as khaki pants.

Stranger Personals

That's not surprising considering the khaki-clad herds of Amazon employees who wander these meanless streets. In the Central District, I have to contend with young black males giving me the stink eye as they slowly jaywalk in front of my car. In South Lake Union, I startle Amazon employees who, absorbed by their cell phones, have stepped into the street without checking for traffic. They always wave, apologize, and hurry to safety.

Amazon: home of the polite monopolists.

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Yo, I'm pretty sure people who work at Amazon wear jeans, not khakis. Check your sources.

Posted by Pepe24s on March 26, 2012 at 11:02 PM · Report

As I understand it, you can buy organic, fair trade stink eye remover at Whole Foods.

Posted by Paddy Mac on March 26, 2012 at 3:58 PM · Report

As one who motors daily in the Central District, who shares not the empirical observations of Mr. Alexie, I am curious as to where one finds these young black men with stink eye who wander on foot in the middle of CD streets in search of pussies to intimidate. Are these young black men with stink eye a real truth of the CD or urban mythmaking on the part of the Stranger, the better to prop up disaffected writers whose street cred rests on small games of chicken in the CD? When Stranger writers report that motor travel in the CD is marked by encounters with young black men with stink eye, report this frequently, does it occur to the Stranger that their reports inform the thinking of folks who shoot black boys with Skittles? What's next for Mr. Alexie? A tour of the urinals of South Lake Union and the CD, with the appropriate and expected hierarchy: Asian, White, Sherman's and BLACK? Nice work.

Posted by nocentstooffer on March 25, 2012 at 9:55 PM · Report

Fully 2/3rds of the female employees (Amazon..esses...?)rock the stretchy-jeans-with-riding-boots every. Single. Day.

Posted by zozebffej on March 22, 2012 at 4:59 PM · Report

it's funny that I never heard all this ruckus when amazon was safely nestled on the top of beacon hill. maybe chinatown was just happy to get the lunch business, or maybe with such great views, the am-holes never left at all.

Posted by jrm555 on March 22, 2012 at 1:11 PM · Report

In other words, yes, this city has become a corporate office park. Those of us with any sensitivity or awareness whatsoever of virtually anything have taken note and are wondering what or where comes next.

Posted by Mob Barley on March 21, 2012 at 7:50 PM · Report