FUNERAL FOR A PLAYGROUND

Well, that's that. As you may have heard, our good friend DJ Nark (Kevin Kauer) is no longer the creative force driving that schmancy new club the kids call Q. There are tons of rumors floating around the strange and sudden departure, but what really happened was this: Nark is 16 months pregnant with Q's buttbaby, and Q just stopped returning his calls. (The bastard!) It's probably the last time we'll ever go, so... let's send Nark off to greener (and less breeder-infested) pastures at the very last installment of his big Saturday event called The Playground, featuring his glorious self and DJ In Flagrante. We shall dance, drink, love, and kiss it all good-bye, forever. (Although it appears that Nark, the trooper, will still occasionally be DJing at Q.) Q, free before 10 pm/$10 after, 21+.

THIRTY-MINUTE HAIRSPRAY

Roxy Casbah. Wilma Princecome. Lisa Rental. SORRY! My suffering little brain has been perverted into a random drag-name generator—I make up drag names all day long. It's a fucking compulsion. I do it in my sleep. Watch: zzzzz... Heidi Hobag! Zzzzz... Sandy Clamwhiskers! See? It's like Giant Faggot Tourette's Syndrome (or GFTS, ask your doctor). But it's an inevitable byproduct of living all smushed and twisted in the middle of the Incredible Drag Queen Renaissance we are all up to our disposable titties in, so I bravely endure. (Rita Book! Patty Cakeman!) Blame it on Jinkx Monsoon, blame it on Ben Delacreme, blame it on the rain—who gives a flaming gay rip? The pump-wearing soldiers in Seattle's amazing army of queens are serious performers with overwhelmingly positive energy and solid production values. (Rhoda Longho!) And towering above them all (quite literally) is the pageant of moxie and color that is Mama Tits. Her every-Sunday drag brunch, Mimosas with Mama, has been getting all kinds of attention lately, and justly so. (Penny Dreadful!) If you've been, you understand. (Livinia Vidaloca!) If you haven't, you don't. (Ivana Rawk!) But whether you have or haven't, you will, and this is the Sunday to do it, as she's adding something very special to the already cabaret-rich lineup: 30 Minute Hairspray! Yes, Hairspray the musical AND the original John Waters film, mashed up and crammed into 30 spastic minutes of draggy brunch freaktasticness. (Annie Portnastorm! Flora Dation!) (Sorry.) The Grill on Broadway, 1 pm, $10, all ages.