FRIDAY 8/2

COLLIDE-O-SCOPE: OUTSIDE AND WET

Is it science? Or dark, soul-sucking witchcraft? Who gives a shit! Somehow, brilliant light/water engineers and/or evil sorcerers have busted out their wickedest tricks to do the impossible—to bring you an evening of Collide-O-Scope in the great outdoors, with the films MAGICALLY PROJECTED ONTO A FUCKING WATERFALL. It happens at the International Fountain or whatever at Seattle Center—you know, where the boys dance naked and expose their tender parts to harmful UV rays after the Pride parade. (I'm fairly sure the Bible takes a pretty dim view of all the above shenanigans. Fuck the Bible. Really. But practice safe sun, gurrlz—it's important!) The Collide-O-Scope boys did this exact same thing last year to tremendous effect, busting out their most colorful, frenetic, and dazzling film clips and shorts to make the most of the unusual, watery venue. The show starts after 9 p.m., as soon as the sun goes down, and I can't promise that there will be free Red Vines and popcorn this time, as there usually are (experts were simply unable to confirm or deny), but you can bring a nice picnic basket stuffed full of your own Red Vines and popcorn, or whatever the hell else you want, because: AMERICA. Bring a blanket. Come early. Seattle Center International Fountain, 9 pm, free, all ages.

SATURDAY 8/3

COCK & BULL: INSIDE AND HORNY

Jeezus Louisezus. We haven't been to Re-bar in a year of Sundays! Doesn't it just seem like? We used to go every other damn weekend almost, but gosh, I haven't had a compelling reason to amble on down in at least two months, I reckon. Tragedy! Well, here's a nice reprieve: this month's Cock & Bull. Should you sadly linger in ignorance: Cock & Bull is a sexy, hot-'n'-grinding new dance night brought to you by those Collide-O-Scope boys mentioned above. It's finally gotten its sea legs and is bringing in a crowd of sexy sexersons and notable gay characters. Ade will be in residence, with James and Kerry Darling working the go-go post. Grrrrr. Woof. Wooof. Re-bar, 10 pm, $5, 21+.