Stephen Richardson and Jeff Steinmetz
THURSDAY 2/3

GIRLYMAN A-CALLING

Last week's obligatory gayness almost (almost!) knocked you on your silly gay ass. Right? Sweet twisted children! I know! I understand! (Dickslap? Lily Tomlin? LILY TOMLIN!? I ask you.) But take courage! It's not all downhill from here, as I'm sure you suspect sometimes, late at night, when you're alone, inhaling bottles of rotgut whatever and listening to that one Morrissey song over and over. (Stop looking at me!) For indeed, your tits shall once again be illated, your twitter a-pated, and your night-freaky hearts shall sizzle like sick sausage in the greasy hot frying pan of it all—I promise. And so! We dive back into it with Girlyman—an awesome little four-member band that has hooked my heart with its smooth sounds and glittery gay ways. If you know of Girlyman, you feel the same. If you don't know them, you soon will. If you doubt me, well, damn you! All you have to do is YouTube that shit to see exactly what I mean. (DO IT!) Girlyman are famous for their fusion of genres (pop? Rock? FOLK? You bet!) and also for collaborating with Margaret Cho, who got quite shirty with me once when I expressed skepticism about her alleged seckshual relationship with Quentin Tarantino. But that's a different story. Isn't it. Triple Door, 7:30 pm, $18 adv/$20 DOS, all ages.

SATURDAY 2/5

BACON GOTH

What is the queer dark magic—the peculiar and perverted secret recipe—that makes Bacon Strip the definitive, once-a-month, must-not-be-missed freaky gay drag-n-dance-yer-ass-off thing? I've never been to a Bacon Strip that's fallen flat. I'm so never disappointed. (And it's going on, what? Six years now?!) Maybe Sylvia sold her soul to Satan. (The theme this time is GOTH, after all—and this isn't the first time!) Maybe I'm just easy. (But then, so are the boys at Bacon Strip.) Whatever. Best not look a great thing in the mouth. Re-bar, 10 pm, $8 in costume/$10 without, 21+.