TROUBLE

Now! Far fucking be it from me to ever apologize for anything (ugh), because clearly I AM RELENTLESSLY RIGHT ABOUT EV-E-RY-THING. It's exhausting to the core. So much so, I guess, that I dropped my balls earlier this month, leaving out TWO TOTALLY IMPORTANT THINGS THAT I TOTALLY FORGOT TO MENTION. (Much in the same way that I sometimes TOTALLY FORGET TO TURN MY CAPS LOCK OFF.) Please allow me to correct. Firstly! Happy belated Cinco de Mayo! Please to enjoy in traditional fashion—by porking a hot Mexican guy. (They're everywhere!) Or Mexican gal, you know, if you're a gal. (We're all about the 'mos here, people.) Or you can pork yourself if you're a Mexican gal, I guess. Whatevs. I'm easy. (Olé!) Secondly! Trouble. You know, Terry Hecker's big flashy dance night that used to be at Re-bar. Its new location at the Fred Wildlife Refuge and Terry's flashy new cred as best-selling author—ooooh!—have blown new blood and sexy, sassy (seckassy?) joie de vivre into the thing, with two floors of music and intense visual spectacle. And you MISSED IT ALL, because it already happened two weeks ago and I didn't bring it up. On the other hand... HA! I totes just superpsyched your ass, because there is another special-edition Trouble TONIGHT, featuring our old friend DJ Fucking in the Streets, but also live sets from Mock & Toof, in from London, who are the big noise of the night. You've been given a second chance. Don't blow it! Fred Wildlife Refuge, 9 pm, $5 adv/$7 DOS, 21+.

HUSSLER

Tonight is all about Ade. Glorious Ade! Beautiful Ade! Übertalented gender-blending genius Ade! Ade—who comes from a long line of classically trained performers, don'tcha know—has been nothing less than a Seattle drag superstar since she first stepped stiletto-shod toe into town. Tonight is her every-second-Friday event at Pony, and there will be go-go boys and live performances, but we're talking about ADE. She's more than worth it, all on her own. And terrible rumors say this might be the last time Ade hosts Hussler at Pony... EVER! Pony, 9 pm, free, 21+.