NEWS

This week's news section in three words: predictable, piffling, pornography. First up: ERICA C. BARNETT coughs up some (more) words on the Alaskan Way Viaduct (predictable), SARAH MIRK profiles some desperate Seattle Sonics fans (piffling), and BARNETT (once again) reports on a strip club in a squabble with the mayor (pornography). PLUS: In the Hall, In Other News, and Police Beat.

SHORT FEATURE: Monumental Victory

Having recently escaped the corrupting confines of The Stranger, THOMAS FRANCIS—the only decent scribe to arrive at (and subsequently flee from) the paper since Sandeep Kaushik—files what one hopes will be his final article for the wretched rag. And though the subject of said article—a Christian Science church being converted into condominiums—isn't exactly tantalizing, it's worth pointing out that Mr. Francis still writes circles around his former comrades.

FEATURE:Shopping SpreeIn the latest installment of The Stranger's ruthless assault upon Christianity (#1,598 in a series—avoid them all!), some unscrupulous bloke named NOEL BLACK "informs" readers how to swindle free goods from the organization Focus on the Family.