12 MINUTES MAX: A PERFORMANCE EXHIBITION
See Stranger Suggests. One weekend only. Seven new dance, theater, and musical works, curated by Megan Murphy and Sean Ryan. See a man dance to the sound of his own breath, and witness simultaneous singing and waffle-making! On the Boards, 100 W Roy St, 217-9888. $7. Sun-Mon at 7 pm.
14/48, THE WORLD'S QUICKEST THEATER FESTIVAL
Opening. One World Theater and Three Card Monty present 14 plays conceived, written, and produced in 48 hours (you'll see seven of these shorts on any given night). Consolidated Works, 500 Boren Ave N, 325-6500. $14.48. Fri-Sat at 8 and 10:30 pm. Through Jan 10.
* THE CRUMPLE ZONE
Final week. Fresh from Los Angeles (where it won the Los Angeles Times' Critics' Choice award), Buddy Thomas' Crumple Zone follows the confused love lives of five gay men in Staten Island. "Five lovesick fags come crashing together in a splashy/flashy/über-trashy holiday montage of ennui, ass-sex, and way too much tinsel on that ironic damn aluminum Christmas tree. And somehow all of this makes for an adorable night of theater. " (Adrian Ryan) Capitol Hill Arts Center, 1621 12th Ave, 325-6500. $12-$22. Thurs-Sat at 8 pm. Through Jan 3.
THE LION, THE WITCH AND THE WARDROBE
An old wardrobe becomes a portal and Christ becomes a lion in this ambitious staging of C. S. Lewis' Jesus-freak classic. Seattle Children's Theatre, Seattle Center, 441-3322. $12-$30. Fri at 7 pm, Sat-Sun at 2 and 5:30 pm. Through Jan 11.
SEA HORSE
Opening. Tacoma Actors Guild presents an autumn romance between a barmaid and a sailor. Theatre on the Square, 901 Broadway, Tacoma, 253-272-2145. $12.50-$28. Wed at 8 pm. Through Jan 25.
THE STARDUST CAVALCADE 1943
Extended. Final week. Harlequin Productions presents a nostalgic return to the days when Americans knew who the bad guys were and committed entire caroling repertoires to heart. Harlequin Productions at State Theater, 202 Fourth Ave E, Olympia, 360-786-0151. $21-$29. Fri at 8 pm, Sat at 3 and 8 pm. Through Jan 3.
* TWISTED OLIVIA
The esteemed Everett Quinton graces Seattle with his Dickens-twisting solo show, Twisted Olivia. "The story (thick with Dickens' delectable improbabilities) unfolds in a lucid shorthand, each ornate personality deftly and vividly articulated. It's all done with humor but also with a rich emotional commitment; self-referential jokes crop up here and there, but sparingly, like a counterpoint that makes the sincerity of the rest of the performance all the more rich. Not to be missed. " (Bret Fetzer) Empty Space Theatre, 3509 Fremont Ave N, 547-7500. $10-$40. Fri-Sat at 2 and 8 pm, Sun at 2 and 7:30 pm, Tues at 7:30 pm. Through Jan 10.
FESTIVALS, CABARET, & COMEDY
LES COMEDIENNES
Opening. Glamazon Follies and the Swedish Housewife provide a post-holiday dose of Parisian glamour. Cabaret on the Hill at Thumper's Restaurant and Bar, 1500 E Madison St, 328-3800. $10. Fri-Sat at 9:30 pm. Through Jan 25.
SPECIAL EVENTS
SPOTLIGHT NIGHT: FORUM & DREAMGIRLS
One night only. 5th Avenue provides a peek behind the curtain of its upcoming productions, A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum and Dreamgirls. 5th Avenue Theatre, 1308 Fifth Ave, 292-2787. Free. Tues at 7 pm.
LONG RUNS
BIG WHEEL BINGO at Rendezvous, 441-5823.
BUBBA AND THE BITCH at Bar, 322-1788.
* THE HOKUM HALL VARIETY SHOW at Hokum Hall, 937-3613.
JET CITY IMPROV at Historic University Theater, 352-8291.
LATE NIGHT CATECHISM from Seattle Theatre Project at ACT, 292-7676.
TEATRO ZINZANNI 2301 Sixth Ave, 802-0015.
