OPENING AND CURRENT RUNS

ALEXANDER AND THE TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, NO GOOD, VERY BAD DAY

"The set is cool and a little dizzying, with a terrific trick of perspective-and if you're stoned there are moments of high, weird comedy, like when Sarah Rudinoff, as a cupcake-scarfing schoolgirl, strides across the stage holding two cupcakes and screams wildly, 'I LOVE THESE CUPCAKES!' The rest of the cast is equally strong, and so are all the stereotypes their characters reinforce: Mom's in an apron and Dad's in a suit, the teacher is a woman and the dentist is a man. In other words, the whole thing is retrograde and sexist when you think about it. You see this show stoned and all sorts of injustices occur to you. But the googley-eyed kids loved it." (Christopher Frizzelle) Seattle Children's Theatre, 201 Thomas St, 441-3322. $14-$28. Fri at 7 pm, Sat-Sun at 2 and 5:30 pm. Through June 12.

ARTHUR: THE HUNT

See review this issue. Taproot Theatre, 204 N 85th St, 781-9707. $15-$29. Thurs at 7:30 pm, Fri at 8 pm, Sat at 2 and 8 pm, Wed at 7:30 pm. Through June 18.

BACH AT LEIPZIG

Final week. "The Itamar Moses script proves definitively that one should never structure a play after a musical form-the epistolary, fugue-inspired first act is so packed with new combinations of repetition that you'll feel yourself getting very sleepy-but the meta, postmodern second act is surprisingly smart without being smarmy. You're expected to keep up with jokes about 18th-century Protestant factionalism, for example, while the silly fugue concept is helpfully spelled out later in the show. The acting is a bit hampered by the necessity of differentiating between very similar characters. John Procaccino, the twitchy, squinty one, suffers most, while R. Hamilton Wright, the short naif, and David Pichette, as yet another superbly rendered anal-retentive villain, come off best." (Annie Wagner) ACT Theatre, 700 Union St, 292-7676. $10-$54. Thurs at 7:30 pm, Fri at 8 pm, Sat at 8 pm, Sun at 2 and 7:30 pm. Through May 29.

BACK OF THE THROAT

See review this issue. Theater Schmeater, 1500 Summit Ave, 325-6500. $15. Thurs-Sat at 8 pm. Through June 18.

BIG RIVER

Opening. Deaf, hard-of-hearing, and hearing actors perform a movement-based adaptation of Mark Twain's The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. Paramount Theatre, 911 Pine St, 292-2787. $23-$59. Opening Tues May 31 at 7:30 pm. Wed at 7:30 pm. Through June 5.

DEFENDING THE CAVEMAN

This mid-'90s relic by comedian Rob Becker is about the supposed prehistoric propensities of the two sexes, and is performed by former Portlander Isaac Lamb. There was no excuse for this show then; there's none now. ACT Theatre, 700 Union St, 292-7676. $35-$39.50. Thurs-Fri at 7:30 pm, Sat at 5 and 8 pm, Sun at 3 pm. Tickets available through May 29.

DINNER & DREAMS

Ongoing. A new musical version of the rabidly successful dinner-theater/circus hybrid, with Martha Davis of the Motels as Madame ZinZanni. Ukrainian contortionist Vita Radionova and aerialists Duo Artemiev are still onboard-or in-tent, or whatever. Teatro ZinZanni, 2301 Sixth Ave, 802-0015. $89-$109. Thurs-Sat at 6:30 pm, Sun at 5:30 pm.

EPITAPH

Opening. Writer-actors Ethan Sandler (who grew up on Mercer Island) and Adrian Wenner bring their two-man show, previously seen at Edinburgh, to Seattle. Epitaph is a comedy about the death of "the perfect woman" and the squabbles that flare up between two friends and rivals during her wake. Seattle Public Theater at the Bathhouse, 7312 W Green Lake Dr N, 524-1300. $10-$20. Preview performance Thurs May 26 at 7:30 pm. Opening Fri May 27 at 7:30 pm. Sat at 7:30 pm, Sun at 2 pm. Through June 12.

FUNERAL FUNHOUSE

One day only. A sketch comedy show with a dose of horror, hosted by Danny Dead. Rendezvous, 2322 Second Ave. $5 (21+ w/ID required). Sun May 29 at 4:30 pm.

THE GOOD DOCTOR

Final week. Eleven Neil Simon sketches based on the early comedic work of Chekhov. Stage One at North Seattle Community College, 9600 College Way N, 527-3661. Donation. Thurs-Sat at 8 pm. Through May 28.

HANDCUFF GIRL SAVES THE WORLD

Final week. "You can't cobble together one-sided reenactments of interviews on heroes (a topic about which almost no one has anything interesting to say)-and fill in the gaps with meetings of a mildly amusing 'superhero support group' and some synchronized dance moves-and call it a play. Still, the production is slick. The set, by the very talented Jennifer Zeyl, is the kind of tricky-cool playground that a great show about superheroes (whatever that might be) could really exploit. The real scenic gem is a grassy mountain complete with soft trapdoors, built-in nooks and stairs, and a flexible shell that can squirm and bulge like an animated volcano." (Annie Wagner) Washington Ensemble Theatre at Little Theater, 608 19th Ave E, 325-5105. $10-$15. Thurs-Sat at 8 pm, Sun at 7 pm, Mon at 8 pm. Through May 30.

HOW I LEARNED TO DRIVE

"What does a reviewer do when the show starts at 7:30 but he thought it started at 8:00-and there's no way into the theater except by walking across the stage? He reclines backstage, staring at the ceiling and feeling like a halfwit, pretending he's listening to a radio play. It was an oddly satisfying way to experience Paula Vogel's How I Learned to Drive, which chews on incest, family, 1960s teen culture, and driving, in that order. Vogel wrote the play in response to Lolita and, like Nabokov, hates the pedophilia while loving the pedophile. Young Lil' Bit learns to drive (and drink and... you know) from her dirty Uncle Peck while mashing with middle school studs and getting lost in the generation gap between her mother and her grandmother's kitchen table talk about sex. Peck (Lee Morris) has a mellifluous and earnest voice while he convinces Lil' Bit (Jill Snyder) that she "shouldn't do anything she doesn't want to do." The production is tender and harrowing at the same time and sounds great from backstage." (Brendan Kiley) Ghost Light Theatricals at Freehold's East Hall Theatre, 1529 10th Ave, second floor, 326-6500. $10-$12. Thurs-Sat at 7:30 pm. Through June 5.

HYPNAGOGIA!

Final week. Josh Knisely wrote this sketch-comedy show inspired by semi-wakefulness. Kirk Anderson and Josh Knisely direct. Rendezvous, 2322 Second Ave, www.brownpapertickets.com. $10. Fri-Sat at 8 pm. Through May 28.

KIMBERLY AKIMBO

Final week. "In this play about a girl whose rare genetic disorder forces her to age at four times the normal rate, her bleak existence is wisely played like normal life, with the humanity of even the most outlandish cruelties keeping us engaged in Kimberly's inherently doomed plight. Despite too many stretches of water-treading dialogue and one distractingly mannered supporting performance, the play works: Kim's headed nowhere but down, but we stay with her, because in Lindsay-Abaire's world, even the monsters are heartbreakers." (David Schmader) ReAct Theatre at Langston Hughes Performing Arts Center, 104 17th Ave S, 364-3283. $9-$12. Fri-Sat at 8 pm, Sun at 2 pm. Through May 29.

LATE-NIGHT CATECHISM

Ongoing. Long-running interactive Catholic-school comedy, in which a nun tells you everything you need to know about your everlasting soul. Cloud 9 Productions at ACT Theatre, 700 Union St, 292-7676. $24.50-$29.50. Thurs-Sat at 8 pm, Sun at 2 pm.

LI'L ABNER

Final week. A tap musical about the classic comic strip, performed by kids between the ages of 5 and 16. Broadway Bound Children's Theatre at ACT Theatre, 700 Union St, 526-5437. $12. Fri at 7 pm, Sat at 3 and 7 pm, Sun at 3 pm. Through May 29.

LOBSTER ALICE

A surreal comedic love triangle involving a Walt Disney Studios secretary named Alice (Beth Cooper), an animator named John (Paul Custodio), and Salvador Dali (Gavin Cummins). Walt Baker (Vilna's Got a Golem) directs. ArtsWest, 4711 California Ave SW, 938-0339. $12-$24. Thurs-Sat at 7:30 pm. Through June 18.

THE MUSIC MAN

Meredith Willson's musical about a scam man and a very clever librarian. Village Theatre at Francis J. Gaudette Theatre, 303 Front St N, Issaquah. 425-392-2202. $26-$42. Thurs-Fri at 8 pm, Sat at 2 and 8 pm, Sun at 2 and 7 pm, Wed at 8 pm. Through June 26 at this location.

MY BOAT TO BAINBRIDGE

"This one-man show by Matt Smith is an extremely low-key tribute to a middle-aged crisis of heterosexual masculinity. Mainly this tired theme takes the form of a creepy obsession about his pet dog's severed testicles, but there's also a good deal of lame nostalgia for the Seattle of yore, and frequent mimicking of birdcalls." (Annie Wagner) Market Theatre, 1428 Post Alley, 781-9273. $15. Fri at 8 pm. Through June 2.

PIRATES OF PENZANCE

The Gilbert & Sullivan musical comedy, directed by Susanna Wilson and Stan Gill. SecondStory Repertory, 16587 NE 74th St, Redmond Town Center, 425-881-6777. $20-$24. Fri-Sat at 8:15 pm. Through June 18.

THE RITZ

Opening. A nostalgic look at the good old days of gay bathhouses, when gangsters on the lam could duck in for safety and don a towel for fun, and HIV was but a glint in a monkey's eye. Is it morally irresponsible to revive this 1975 Terrence McNally farce? Ask director José Amador. Open Circle Theater at Re-bar, 1114 Howell St, 382-4250. $10-$14. Opening Thurs May 26 at 8 pm. Fri-Sat at 8 pm. Through June 25.

TEA AT FIVE

Final week. "In this one-woman Katharine Hepburn extravaganza, star Kate Mulgrew struts and swans and croaks her way around the stage with earnest glee. Mulgrew (who, according to her bio, made 'television history' as Star Trek: Voyager's intrepid lady-captain) aptly apes every one of Hepburn's legendary tics, and, well, that's pretty much as far as it goes. Despite a handful of mildly amusing witticisms, some almost-poignant personal revelations, and one lingering image of a naked John Barrymore 'cupping my right buttock,' Tea at Five fails to move even one famously red hair past caricature. You can't help but feel horrified on Great Kate's behalf when, in the play's final moments, Mulgrew follows the affecting if painfully trite question, 'What was it all for?' with a cheap joke and-I am not kidding-a positively slapstick WINK and SHRUG at the audience. This reduction of a life seems more like exploitation than celebration. But I did like it when she described chicken baked with cornflakes as 'flavorsome.'" (Lindy West) Seattle Repertory Theatre, 155 Mercer St, 443-2222. $24-$55. Thurs-Fri at 7:30 pm, Sat at 2 and 7 pm, Sun at 2 pm, Tues-Wed at 7:30 pm. Through May 29.

WEST SIDE STORY

Final week. A student production of the Leonard Bernstein musical based on Romeo & Juliet. Shoreline Community College, 16101 Greenwood Ave N, 546-4606. $10-$14. Thurs-Sat at 7:30 pm. Through May 28.

YA GOT TROUBLE!

Opening. A workshop production of an original one-man musical about the life of actor Robert Preston (Mark Sparks). Rita Giomi directs. Village Theatre, 120 Front St, Issaquah, 425-392-2202. $16-$20. Opening Thurs May 26 at 8 pm. Fri-Sat at 8 pm, Sun at 2 pm, Wed at 8 pm. Through June 12.

A YEAR WITH FROG AND TOAD

The Tony Award-nominated musical is based on the children's books by Arnold Lobel, with music by Robert Reale and book and lyrics by Willie Reale. Seattle Children's Theatre, 201 Thomas St, Seattle Center, 441-3322. $14-$28. Fri at 7 pm, Sat-Sun at 2 and 5:30 pm. Through June 5.

DANCE

CORNISH JUNIOR DANCE COMPANY SPRING CONCERT

One night only. A concert by young dancers (ages 6-18) with original ballet works by choreographers Pat Hon, Christine Juarez, and Courtney Harris. Performing Arts Center at Shorecrest High School, 15343 25th Ave NE, Shoreline, 325-6500. $7-$10. Sat May 28 at 3 and 7:30 pm.

THE DEAD FATHER

One weekend only. New York-based choreographer Paul D. Mosley presents the premiere of a new dance work based on the book by Donald Barthelme. Velocity Dance Center, 915 E Pine St, second floor, 245-0437. $8-$10. Fri-Sat May 27-28 at 8 pm.

LINESCAPE

A multidisciplinary program at CoCA, including visual art, performance, and music. This week's event features the Implied Violence ensemble. Center on Contemporary Art, 410 Dexter Ave N, 728-1980. $5-$8. Thurs at 8 pm. Through June 4.

LATE NIGHT

IT'S THE WATER

Opening. A new sketch comedy show from Flaming Box of Stuff, set in the blue-collar world of a 1970s brewery. Comedy duo Champagne opens. Open Circle Theater, 429 Boren Ave N. Tickets available at the door, $8. Opening Fri May 27 at 11 pm. Sat at 11 pm. Through June 4.

SWING-IT MIDNIGHT REVUE

A late-night comedy and music show, from the folks at Jet City Improv. Historic University Theater, 5510 University Way NE. $5 at the door (18+ w/ID required). Sat at midnight. No closing date set.

IMPROV & COMEDY

DIVINE ORDER OF THE HAHA SISTERHOOD at Comedy Underground, 222 Main St, 628-0303. $8. Thurs at 8:30 pm. HIGH CONTRAST COMEDY at Comedy Underground, 222 Main St, 628-0303. $6. Tues at 8:30 pm. JET CITY IMPROV at Historic University Theater, 5510 University Way NE, 325-6500. $8-$10. Fri at 10:30 pm, Sat at 8 and 10:30 pm. DARRYL LENOX at Comedy Underground, 222 S Main St, 628-0303. $12. Fri-Sat at 8:30 and 10:30 pm. SCATTERBRAINS at ArtsWest, 4711 California Ave SW, 938-0339. $5-$7. Sat May 28 at 10:30 pm. THEATRESPORTS at Market Theater, 1428 Post Alley, 781-9273. $8-$10. Fri-Sat at 10:30 pm, Sun at 7 pm.

SPECIAL EVENTS

FEMME-TASTIC

One night only. A queer cabaret with burlesque, "kinky verbal acrobatics," and so forth. Queering Femininity Conference at Washington State Convention Center, 800 Convention Place, sixth floor, www.femmeconference.org. $7-$10. Sat May 28 at 8 pm.