Thursday, May 23

8:00 FOX BLADE--Movie

(1998) Wesley Snipes looks for some vampire ass to stick his boot into.


Friday, May 24

8:00 DSC NAVY SEALS TRAINING

A new reality show documenting military jarheads being put through the worst torture of their lives (hee, hee, hee).


Saturday, May 25

8:00 ANI CRUFTS DOG SHOW

Athletic dogs compete to see who can catch the most Frisbees, jump over the most barricades, and hump the most legs.


Sunday, May 26

10:00 DSC TOTALLY OUT OF CONTROL

This is not about naked coeds. It's about crazy people. Sigh.


Monday, May 27

8:00 VH1 AN OFFICER AND A GENTLEMAN--Movie

(1982) Trailer trash Debra Winger uses the threat of pregnancy against Navy boy Richard Gere to "lift her up where she belongs."


Tuesday, May 28

9:00 TNN BLOOD SIMPLE--Movie

(1984) The first major release by the Coen Brothers is still their best! Unfaithful lovers get caught in a web of murder in a small Texas town.


Wednesday, May 29

9:00 CBS THE MISS UNIVERSE PAGEANT

Yet another totally unfair beauty pageant where you never see one single hot babe from another planet.

Send your TV character friend to steve@thestranger.com