8:00 WB FAMILY AFFAIR
Debut! Gary Cole is the bachelor uncle and Tim Curry is the befuddled butler in this remake of the 1960s anti-nuclear family gem.
9:00 TBS JAWS--Movie
(1975) Steven Spielberg's ass-chewing tribute to the shark.
7:00 FAM FACTS OF LIFE REUNION
Mrs. Garrett gets the girls back together when she finds out that Blair is having trouble with her Tootie.
9:00 HBO THE SOPRANOS
Season Premiere! After a hiatus of a year and a half (!!), the goombah soap opera returns. And they expect us to be just waiting around? Fuhgeddaboutit!
9:00 WB EVERWOOD
Debut! Treat Williams drags his whiny brats to a new life in Colorado. Oh, gee... thanks, DAD. Why don't you just join the goddamn militia while you're at it?!?
8:00 ABC 8 SIMPLE RULES
Debut! John "Three's Company" Ritter returns to TV as an uptight pop who attempts to keep his hot and slutty daughters from getting banged by every horny stud in the neighborhood.
9:00 FOX FASTLANE
Debut! Peter Facinelli and MTV's Bill Bellamy star as undercover cops who are happily bossed around by Tiffani Amber Thiessen. Could be a winner!
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