9:00 13 ACTION

That dirty rotten prick Peter Dragon is forced to be nice to his employees for the holidays. YAWN! ZZZZZZZ! SNORE!

10:00 5 ER

TV's most disgusting doctor show celebrates Christmas with an episode featuring seven vomiting Santas.

8:00 13 OLIVE THE OTHER REINDEER

Matt Groening (The Simpsons) produced this new special about a dog who wants to be one of Santa's reindeer.

9:00 13 THE PJs HOLI- DAY SPECIAL

In order to buy his wife's present, Thurgood earns money the old-fashioned way: by repossessing all of his tenant's belongings.

1:00 22 THE MUPPET CHRISTMAS CAROL-Movie

Failed actor Michael Caine hits a new career low in this puppet-filled adaptation of Dickins' classic.

9:00 DSC IF WE HAD NO MOON

Kind of like It's A Wonderful Life... except with the moon.

8:00 5 IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE-Movie

(1946) Kind of like If We Had No Moon... except with Jimmy Stewart.

8:00 13 THE SIMPSONS

Bart and Lisa battle celebrity guests Tim Robbins and Gary Coleman for the perfect Christmas toy.

9:00 13 ALLY MCBEAL

Elaine finds a real live baby in a Nativity scene, and unfortunately for all concerned, decides to adopt it.

10:00 COM STRANGERS WITH CANDY

Of the many humiliations Jeri (the 49-year-old ex-prostitute/crack addict and high school freshman) constantly endures, she is not pleased when "wearing braces" is added to the list.

8:00 22 BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER

Sure, Buffy knew her new roomie was a bitch from hell, but she had no idea she was an ACTUAL bitch from hell!

10:00 4 ONCE AND AGAIN

As Christmas approaches, whiny fortysomethings Rick and Lily find new and exciting things to whine about.

9:00 4 DREW CAREY

Drew seduces octogenarian Shirley "Partridge Family" Jones by rapping, "You're a fine old woman, so back that thang up!"