"FUCK OFF!" SEEMS TO BE THE HARDEST WORD: Fabulous fogey Elton John tried to get a little Seattle-style R & R while in town for his recent concert, but those pesky fans just wouldn't leave him alone! Wed 5/26, 4 pm-ish, he slipped in the side door of Paul Allen's new playpen, the Cinerama, to take in the latest Star Wars product. TTS spy Sean reports that Elton stepped out of a limo "looking frumpy, with orangish-red hair, wearing a blue running suit." As Elton & entourage were walking to the side entrance, Sean says, "two fans hopped out of a car--I guess they had been following the limo. They were holding Elton John albums and tried to get an autograph. I'm not sure if it was Elton saying it, but I heard 'No way in Hell!' and 'Fuck off.'" (Attaboy, Elton! Stick it to those lousy stalkers!) · · · Gracious TTS reader Zac, however, made the cut--in the middle of The Phantom Menace he ran into Elton just as the star was hurrying out of the "family washroom"! Lucky Zac, who got to shake Elton's hand, was relieved to find that Captain Fantastic did NOT stink up the can! Thanks, Elton!

* * *

GOING UP! Which mega rock star is getting a brand new house built? Why, blond bombshell Eddie Vedder! In fact, a couple weekends back, Mr. V hosted a "mid-house construction bash" for his crew, during which he performed with various famous friends and even signed autographs. Not only that, he gave everyone commemorative T-shirts!! Such a mensch!

* * *

THE ODD COUPLE: You'll never believe which musical geniuses have been hanging out together--"ass bandit" Sir Mix-a-Lot and all-purpose drummer Jason Finn, ex of the Presidents. The two were kicking back at Jason's apartment... now, what in the heck are they cooking up? I don't know, but later Mr. A-Lot was spotted cruising up Denny in a big green convertible. Headed for Dick's Drive-In, perhaps?

* * *

THIS JUST IN: "Seen on the back patio at Marco's Supper Club: KOMO news dude Eric Slocum, with an OLDER woman (perhaps mom?). Eric looked tan and healthy, although he has no butt to speak of really, and his hair is thinner than you'd think from seeing him on TV. He's pretty tall too, especially compared to the Q13 shrimp puffs! He wore a goofy-ass blue shirt with floppy pocket flaps and dark blue jeans. He was very low-key and mellow, except when it came time to pay the bill--HE PAID IN CASH! LOTS OF IT! Hey, big spender!" (Thanks to Mark, my #1 Nosy Nellie!)

* * *

BISQUE, BISQUE, BABY! Where does tough guy Vanilla Ice go to unwind from another hard night's work on the comeback trail? Apparently, he goes to Minnie's--that's where he was spotted with his "posse" at 4 am Sun 5/23, downing a tasty, warming bowl of tomato-basil soup!

* * *

GOSSIP OVERLOAD! Wanna read about Demi Moore, Bill Gates, and those ill-behaved SIFF megastars? Turn to the Film section, page 27, for the TTS SIFF Movie-Star Extra! Meanwhile, I'm sending Stranger boxer shorts to Philip and Sean, those lucky ducks who spotted Demi and Elton. Stay alert, and next week YOU could be a winner! shirley@thestranger.com, 323-7101 ext. 3137.