"I’m a longtime fan and listener of the Savage Lovecast," writes a longtime fan and a listener to the Savage Lovecast. "I’m writing you to nominally get your opinion on the attached meme that has been going around my social media sphere lately. I say nominally because I have a feeling that I know your opinion (that this is, in general, an unreasonable standard to have in a relationship, but if its the stated 'contract' in a relationship then so be it), I’m just hoping that you publicly eviscerate it in a way that only you can."

Step One: Define cheating as an unforgivable betrayal, something the cheater can never live down and cheated can never get over, and insist that divorce is the only appropriate and rational response...

Step Two: Define absolutely everything as cheating: flirting, masturbating, looking at porn, reading through online sex and/or personal ads, taking out an online personal ad for kicks, communicating with exes, holding on to mementos from prior relationships, having a crush on someone else, thinking about someone else during sex, having an erotic dream about someone else...

Step Three: Stand around with our thumbs in our butts wondering why the divorce rate is so high.