Porn is like the Vietcong and sweet revenge is not letting them shoot down your resolve because then you'll wind up masturbating in a bamboo cage and your brain will have trails in it and oh look a noose. Also, chalkboards, so science.

I'm going to beat off while I watch this video. Not because it's that sexy, despite all the phallic imagery and explosions and secksy mens in uniform. Just on principle.