Moonlight really fucking won, yall.
Moonlight really fucking won, y'all. Getty Images

Mahershala Ali and Viola Davis took home supporting acting awards for Moonlight and Fences, Barry Jenkins, the writer-director of Moonlight, won for Best Adapted Screenplay, and for much of the evening, it looked like Moonlight might actually steal the Oscar spotlight. There were several firsts—among them, incredibly, Ali was the first Muslim actor to win.

As expected, the movie about two young dreamers trying to make it in L.A. took home Oscars for the score and songwriting categories, and it seemed like this would be the woke Oscars America fucking deserves right now.

When the Best Directing category went to La La Land’s young director Damien Chazelle it was all you needed to know: La La Land would be taking the Best Picture trophy. The two awards rarely split. (Though it has done so more in recent years, overall it has only split 27 percent overall.)

And, as expected, La La Land won.

But, it didn't.

Because Warren Beatty, who was announcing the award with Faye Dunaway, is blind as a fucking bat and couldn't read name on the envelope. Faye Dunaway blurted it out for him.

It was only when the producer, Jordan Horowitz, who had just given his speech talking about making 'bold and diverse work for everyone," did it become apparent what had actually happened.

He interrupted the other speeches and said, "Moonlight has won Best Picture. No, I'm really serious."

At first, it seemed like a moment when Macklemore said his Grammy should go to Kendrick Lamar. A white artist feeling like they didn't deserve an award in the shadow of a much more talented artist and doing the right thing.

But it was real.

Warren Beatty had the wrong envelope. The envelope for Emma Stone's Best Actress win was the one he was looking at.

Kimmel came out on stage: "Personally, I blame Steve Harvey for this."

Other big winners:

Best Actor: Casey Affleck for Manchester By the Sea

Best Actress: Emma Stone for La La Land

Animated Picture: Zootopia

Original Screenplay: Manchester By the Sea

Best Documentary: O.J.: Made in America

Jimmy Kimmel's turn as host was mostly successful—he alternated between gently biting celeb commentary (several jokes poking straight at Mel Gibson, sitting with a woman 40 years younger than him in the front row, and used some of the same gags he does on his own show, including “Mean Tweets,” and perennial favorite, making fun of Matt Damon.


An extended prank featuring a group of supposedly unaware tourists being surprised with a front-row view of the A-list crowd was both cringeworthy and hilarious.

Kimmel drew criticism from people who seemed to think his quips referencing non-Anglo names was insensitive (perhaps, the joke was too meta).

Anti-Trump commentary was subtle rather than overt. (We waited for someone to yell "Fuck Trump!" but all we got was a baiting Tweet from Kimmel to Trump: "U up?")

The most pointed political moment came during the acceptance speech for Best Foreign Language Film, The Salesman. Iranian director Asghar Farhadi opted to stay home rather than attend. Anousheh Ansari accepted on his behalf and read his letter.


"I'm sorry I'm not with you tonight. My absence is out of respect for the people of my country, and those of [the] other six nations who have been disrespected by the inhumane law that bans entry of immigrants to the U.S. Dividing the world into the 'us' and 'our enemies' categories creates fear – a deceitful justification for aggression and war. These wars prevent democracy and human rights in countries which have themselves been victims of aggression.

"Filmmakers can turn their cameras to capture shared human qualities and break stereotypes of various nationalities and religions. They create empathy between us and others, an empathy which we need today more than ever."

So, Moonlight really won. Life is good. I am rich. Trump is not President.