Apparently, those in the room during his farewell speech as CEO at Starbucks' annual shareholders' meeting seemed to think that Howard Schultz wasn't retiring, but pivoting toward a much bigger job: Commander-in-Chief.

I mean, why the fuck not?

Since we've clearly given up on the idea of a woman holding higher office—Gov. Jay Inslee's name is being floated as a 2020 Presidential hopeful, too (fine, whatever, I want Bob)—and Michael Moore has already said that we should just run "beloved" people, like Oprah and Tom Hanks, why not Schultz?

Here's a businessman who's actually successful, who has shepherded Starbucks from a small coffee chain serving moderately acceptable coffee into one with more than 24,000 stores worldwide (and apparently, 12,000 more coming in the next year). Over the years, it's hit several road bumps—the most significant after he left in 2000 and the company tried to expand too quickly—but has righted its course, expanding into the boutique coffee market, and has taken mostly admirable positions on social issues, including refugee hiring, paying toward college education for its employees, and offering parental leave for its corporate employees (though, it's still behind in offering leave to baristas).

But more importantly, it is because of Starbucks that airport coffee is far better to drink now. I mean, that's definitely an achievement.

Writes the Financial Times:

The real story is whether Mr. Schultz is positioning himself as a business-friendly Democratic presidential candidate for 2020.

While Mr. Schultz says he “has no plans” to run for office, he believes that in his post-Starbucks’ future he has “a role to play to elevate the national conversation, both in the US and around the world”, on issues like economic bifurcation, racial tension, populism and the role of the private sector in fostering more sustainable and inclusive growth.

“We’re living in a fragile world,” says Mr. Schultz. “There’s a need for more passionate government.”

If you're thinking, WTF does a more passionate government have to do with a coffee chain?, you'd be right. While we need more business owners to be less evil in general (hey, Facebook, I'm looking at you), it does seem awfully curious that a businessman with no political interests would be giving speeches that struck just the right social justice cues.

Since we're reading CEO speech tea leaves, Mark Zuckerberg also seems to be positioning himself for a run at the big job. A few weeks ago, the Ringer, in an article titled: "Zuckerberg Makes a Non-Stump Speech Stop in North Carolina," noted:

"Photo-ops aside, if any moment of Zuckerberg’s latest road trip hinted at an audition for public office, it was the town hall he was a featured speaker for at North Carolina Agricultural & Technical State University on Monday. For years now, Zuckerberg has been lobbed softball after softball at his own town halls, livestreamed for all to see from his company’s Menlo Park mothership. But Monday he graduated to a new, challenging tier: taking questions in front of a mostly black audience of college students just a few months after Donald Trump was elected president. On top of all of that, the event was Facebook Live’d to an audience of over 3.1 million people.

Wheeeee! More white guys for president! Sooo awesome!

But seriously, what I wouldn't give to snap my fingers and have a President Schultz right now. I might make like Frizzelle and go buy a Frappucinno.