Police Reports Illustrated: Two Women Wait For Cake

Comments

1
Such awful women.
2
OMG, the subcommentary on the Walla Wallas is Callan's best ever. I didn't want to go to Whitman anyway! The city so forgettable they named it twice! The Napa Valley of onions! ROTFLMAO.
3
@2: Ah, thank you. I couldn't make out "Whitman" so I couldn't get the joke.

Y'all don't suppose they were trying to purchase yellow cake from the store, do you? Do we need to be concerned about these women being on the loose?

*as in uranium!
4
Wait, did she actually make a weak pun to go with her weak assault, or was that Callan's joke?

The onions are indeed approximately the best thing ever.
5
@4

Yes she did, as surely as the detergent hit that exact​ Pepsi display. Remember, these are based on actual police reports.
6
If only she washed with Cheer.
7
I'm sure she gave it her all.
8
What the women did was felony robbery. It went from misdemeanor shoplift the second she used force (throwing the detergent at the clerk) to get the property stolen.
9
@8: I'm having déjà vu to a previous police reports illustrated in which there was similar shoplifting by two women, also intercepted by a store clerk, that also escalated to robbery when they threw merchandise at the clerk, with a similar puntastic getaway quip, with similar comments about whether the pun actually happened or was artistic embellishment, and a legal explanation of how the assault escalated what would have been petty larceny to robbery.

If I recall correctly, it involved a wheel of cheese.

Ah, here we go. Small world of punny, assaulty shoplifters and astute commenters.
10
Cheer up, people! While these women were able to Wisk away with nothing Xtra to Gain, presumably they'll make a Fresh Start, and it'll only be a matter of time before we're again able to Surf another Ultra Fab PRI comic extolling their Bold exploits.