This past week had two truly low points: the brutal hate crime slayings in Portland and the greatly accelerated collapse of our climate, courtesy of Trump. But #covfefe, right?

This week from letter-writers: How do you come out as gay at work? How do you jerk off to "nonconsensual sexual contact" and still call yourself a feminist? How does a quad poly squad get their libidos to sync? And now a selection of responses to my responses that were too good for comment threads (and so were e-mailed to me directly):

First, more—still more—on CLIF:

Your revisiting the CLIF case re-prompted my initial desire to write in:

Pelvic nerve damage (bruising, for example) can take a long time to heal—there's a lot of tangly stuff in that part of the body, like blood supply to the MANY nerves and lots of connective tissue—but it can heal. It probably takes finding some unusual physical therapists who pay attention to things like blood supply to nerves and visceral manipulation: training in the Baral and Upledger schools would be what I'd start with.

(I spent 10 years with a torn hip socket, that translates, in modern medicine, to "women's problems" that no one was good at fixing, till I found some awesome physical therapists who sent me to get my hip sewn up and coaxed the blood back and the nerves to chill — after getting to the point where I couldn't feel much at ALL below the waist, all the way down the leg, making sex really really suck.) Nerves grow slowly, though, so calm and patience can be really helpful. And the acknowledgement that losing familiar responses in genital nerves SUCKS — and that pain in the area can really get worse if provoked and not addressed.

Thanks for sharing your wonderful self so steadily; this may be a thing where it's helpful for some clit-havers to weigh in!

And, hey, someone out there liked my original response!

You always make my day! Thanks for a wonderful response to CLIF! I was so relieved for you to mention all you did!!! I get so tired of fictional sex and also never seeing actual female orgasms in porn! We have erections too! My friend insists she has come during intercourse and I always thought OMG something wrong with me?! But having a close relationship with my clit for decades (I was 8 or 9 when I had my first orgasm) I'm pretty sure I come normally. I call the penetration feeling I get sometimes as a "rush" but not an orgasm. (I get it from anal too!) I can only assume that perhaps many women just haven't had a true orgasm with their clits? I sure hope not but!

For DOUCHE:

Generally, I love what you do but...

Regarding your reply today to the guy who needs two hours to douche (and a number of earlier columns) I would like to suggest, Dan, that you, yourself, have some issues with matters of poop, scat and things related to defecation. I noticed the piece included a number of snide little references to, in effect, "How dirty and disgusting this is but I'm going to tell you anyway." Dan, I hope you will give this an honest examination and consider looking at these issues from a new angle.

I will get to work on unpacking my anti-poop bias right after never.

On this week's opening of the Savage Lovecast:

I want to thank you for your recent opening talk about the Portland stabbing and the three people who intervened and were killed and injured. I'm writing you, for the first time, because I was very moved by your passionate comments about these brave people who really do represent the best about people, as well as offering such a stark contrast with the malignancy and narcissism of the our horrible, terrible, no-good president and all his enablers and hangers-on. I've written my congress people and also the White House asking them to take note and say aloud the three names—Ricky Best, Taliesin Myrddin Namkai-Meche, and Micah Fletcher.

Although I have learned a lot about sex and all its various manifestations from listening to your podcast, I like your opening rants the best. FYI, I am a 73 year old woman with less than no interest in sex at this point in my life so I'm guessing I'm not your average listener, but I thought you might like to hear from me anyhow! The outline of my story is that I've been intentionally single for maybe the last 10 years after one four-year marriage and many unfortunate and nonviable relationships, and my main feeling about sex now is great relief that I don't have to deal with it anymore. The thought that I never have to attend to another penis actually gives me joy (nothing personal). But still, I don't look back with regret and I don't think I'm missing out on anything or that I'm rationalizing. I feel how I feel and and that's fine. I'm a happy asexual with no apologies, and your show has definitely been a part of helping me get there. So thank you for that too.

More on erectile dysfunction and Caverject:

Thanks for printing the additional advice for the woman whose (much older) husband could no longer sustain an erection. One comment: An erection lasting six hours is typically considered a medical emergency and needs to be treated immediately to avoid permanent damage to the man's penis. The warning that came with my Trimix perscription, indicates four hours is the max. More commonly (like warnings with ED drugs) warning is two hours. And I hope the husband has a physical exam to rule out heart problems or diabetes as a cause of his ED. Often, ED is the canary in the coal mine for other serious medical problems.

Finally, some love for the Lovecast:

Thank you SO MUCH for your latest episode. I started listening to your podcast and other sex-positive podcasts about two years ago, searching for something—ANYTHING—that could help me. My husband and I have vastly different sex drives. Lots and lots of nuts and bolts here, but I've been made to feel that there's something wrong with me, that I should just do it, and on and on and on, with no help in finding an actual solution. I've come to the realization that nothing is wrong with either one of us, we just have different levels of interest in sex, which doesn't really help when he's still not getting as much as he would like... but that's a story for another day.

Anyway, nothing in these last two years has really described my situation until you mentioned hypersomnia. My interest was piqued immediately because I've always had kind of a complicated relationship with sleep. I don't fall asleep during the day, but even a quick Google search pretty much sums up my life since I was 12 years old. I had two sleep studies in my mid-20s because my doctor thought my migraines were sleep-related. I've had countless tests and checks on my hormone levels for my low sex drive. I've talked to two different therapists on my own and another one with my husband concerning our sex life. I haven't felt rested in years. Not one of the doctors or therapists or whatever those yahoos at the sleep study clinic are called (tests were inconclusive, BTW, but they suggested I lay off caffeine after 10 a.m. Right.) breathed a word about hypersomnia. You threw me a lifeline, and I want to hug you for it. Early days yet, but you might've saved my marriage too.

And from Africa:

Bi-lady serving as a Peace Corps volunteer in Africa, working in fisheries management and girl's empowerment. I live in a rural village, am fluent in the local language, and absolutely love my job. However, the culture here is EXTREMELY conservative. Women (including me) are expected to wear floor length skirts and dresses, cover our shoulders and breasts, and bow to men when we speak to them. Also, male homosexuality is illegal here. The only reason female homosexuality isn't illegal is people don't believe that it exists.

I just wanted to write and thank you for the incredible gift the Savage Lovecast has been these last two years. I listen to your podcast every week. It feels like a little act of rebellion to wander around the village listening to you talk about butt plugs through my earbuds. Listening has also helped me to become more sex-positive, something that I try to pass on to the girls in my community. In my club we do condom demonstrations (something technically illegal in schools here) talk about HIV/AIDs, early marriage, menstruation, and even female pleasure! (Most girls believe that sex should be painful for women, and it's only enjoyable for men.) Even though I may be closeted in my village, listening to the Lovecast has helped me feel connected to LBGT community. Thanks for all the laughs and support.