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News & ArtsThursday, May 21, 2009
Chow / ??!! What's for Breakfast: Walkers Cajun Squirrel Flavour Potato Crisps
Posted by Brendan Kiley on Thu, May 21, 2009 at 11:02 AM
Amy Steed, mother of loyal Slog reader Emily Steed, was recently in London and brought her daughter two bags of this:
Steed mère packed the bags in a shoebox (to preserve the chips' structural integrity) and carried them from London to Naples to Rome to Atlanta to Seattle. Steed fille—generously? cruelly?—offered to give me one of her bags.
Apparently, Walkers Cajun Squirrel Flavour Potato Crisps is part of some contest. Six citizens of Britannia came up with six flavors—onion bhaji, builder's breakfast ("on time, on budget from Emma in Belper!"), chili and chocolate—but only one can stay.
Martyn in Hednesford (pop. 17,000, best known for producing soccer players and a race car driver ) invented the Cajun squirrel flavor. The recipe contains: milk lactose, salt, sugar, flavourings, dried onion, dried garlic, dried lemon juice, cardamon, ginger, coriander, chili, cumin, oregano, thyme, allspice, parsley, colour (paprika extract).
That plus potato and sunflower oil allegedly tastes like squirrel.
What they actually taste like is this:
Kind of smoky, kind of barbecue-y, kind of get-this-taste-out-of-my-mouth-right-now-please.
I'd feel bad for dissing Martyn of Hednesford's squirrel-flavored chips... except it turns out that Martyn of Hednesford is a big fucking fraud.
Turns out Martyn of Hednesford has NEVER EVEN EATEN A SQUIRREL. From an investigative report by the Birmingham Mail:
Marketing executive Martyn, from Hednesford, near Tamworth, said he hit upon the idea of the squirrel flavour after seeing it on the menu of upmarket eateries.“I wanted something unique,” he said.
“The gentle Cajun flavouring will be delicious and although the idea might sound bizarre, it really works.
“I’ve seen squirrel on restaurant menus and on cookery shows but had never tried it myself.
“I thought it would be a popular flavour as people would be intrigued to try it.
“No squirrels were harmed in the making of these crisps.”
Anyway, it hardly matters anymore.
Builder's Breakfast won the contest.
In your FACE, Martyn of Hednesford!
Thanks to the Steeds, Walkers, a shock-proofed shoebox, and the deep eccentricity of English people for this edition of What's for Breakfast.
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Squirrel brains and human mad cow disease
A history of eating squirrel brains was obtained from family members of all five patients with probable or definite CJD seen over 3,5 years in a ...
http://www.mad-cow.org/~tom/victim23.htm…
19
Squirrel brains and human mad cow disease
A history of eating squirrel brains was obtained from family members of all five patients with probable or definite CJD seen over 3,5 years in a ...
http://www.mad-cow.org/~tom/victim23.htm…
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