[Whatever, 3:33 am is the morning, I'm doing this now.]

2,000 College Students: Sick with swine flu at Washington State University.

Two Soldiers from Fort Lewis: Killed in Iraq.

Hutchison Pulls Ahead of Constantine in King County Race: By three points, according to SurveyUSA.

Cougar Still on the Loose: A man says he saw the cougar on his driveway and it ran off into Discovery Park. Next sentence: "Meanwhile, a raccoon whose carcass was found in the park Friday morning apparently was not killed by the cougar, but was possibly eaten by a homeless person, according to the Seattle Parks Department."

That Black Man on the TV: The ridiculous "debate" over whether schoolchildren should be watching their own president say things.

Yeah, He's a Good Writer, Just Have Him Write It: White House mulls writing its own health-care legislation.

Alleged Kidnapper and Alleged Rapist: Also alleged writer of creepy songs.

Teenage Unemployment Rate: At its "its highest level since the government began keeping track of such statistics in 1948."

ELF: Yep, we did it.

Obsessive Bumbershoot Coverage All Weekend: Right here.