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News & ArtsThursday, October 15, 2009
City "Now entering Columbia City station. Doors to my right."
Posted by Dan Savage on Thu, Oct 15, 2009 at 12:12 PM
Can a disembodied voice have a right? Or a left? I get it, of course: "she" means to the right as you face the direction the light rail train is moving. But if there was an actual conductor—and the recordings that announce each station stop are meant to create the aural illusion that there is an actual conductor—she wouldn't make her announcements with her back to us. She'd turn face the passengers, some of whom are facing away from her, but all of whom are riding behind her. Which would put the door on her left, right?
1
but bus drivers don't turn around. they speak into the microphone, while carefully watching where they're going.
2
she would make the announcements while driving, and hopefully looking forward. like a bus driver, yes?
5
I prefer to think that it's the voice of the train itself. Technology gives voice to inanimate objects! Maybe Mudede would like to write a 1000 word exposition on how we've animated the material to do our bidding.
6
the "I" here is the bus. the bus is talking to you. the doors that are opening are on the bus' right. duhhhhhh.
9
And there is an actual conductor on the light rail. They don't do the announcements but they are there. And if they did do the announcements, ditto 1 and 2
10
I brought up the same exact issue just this past Monday night. My partner told me, "Stop being such a smartass." I guess I have that in common with you, Dan; you know, from one smartass to another.
12
What would you have the announcement say instead? The direction of travel is the only constant. Passengers can end up facing every which way. Even—god forbid!—sideways!
Maybe you'd prefer "Doors opening on the train's right"?
Maybe you'd prefer "Doors opening on the train's right"?
13
I wish more of Seattle's infrastructure would talk to us. Wait, that's the way to Sirius Corp. I think I'm going up against the wall when the revolution comes for saying that now.
15
Regardless of whether it's the right/left, it's plain creepy to have a bus speak in first person. HAL much?
I'd prefer no announcement. See doors open, get off bus. Ta dah!
I'd prefer no announcement. See doors open, get off bus. Ta dah!
16
#5 & #6 are right.
It is the train that is speaking to you. The voice is not disembodied at all, that is the voice of the train. When the train says "Doors to my right", she means right with respect to her, the train.
And blaine is a pain.
It is the train that is speaking to you. The voice is not disembodied at all, that is the voice of the train. When the train says "Doors to my right", she means right with respect to her, the train.
And blaine is a pain.
20
It's cool HALette assumes a ridership so heavy that people are having to stand pressed against the doors on both sides, so need to be warned to step aside if the next stop isn't theirs. Maybe someday....?
21
@12 et al:
The reason for the announcement is so that any douches standing in the door have a moment to get more in the way to slow your exit down--or to get the heck out of the way.
The CTA announcement specifies "In the direction of travel, doors open on your [right/left]." Wordy but accurate.
The reason for the announcement is so that any douches standing in the door have a moment to get more in the way to slow your exit down--or to get the heck out of the way.
The CTA announcement specifies "In the direction of travel, doors open on your [right/left]." Wordy but accurate.
23
In Victoria, BC, busses on the way to the depot announce on their message boards: "Sorry, I'm not in service." Even our busses are overly-polite.
24
I can't deal with the announcement at the stations to stay behind something like "the textured yellow strip". Too close to "ribbed for her pleasure."
25
for god's sake. how about "the train is about to stop. please exit thru the doors that open." how much lead time do you need to figure out how to go thru an open door?!
26
Why can't they say port and starboard? Those don't change, and people too stupid to remember them and/or stay out of the doorwells might get dumped off the train. Win/win.
28
Sorry to post again quikly... but there is a conductor. I usually try to give a thank you (hand, head) acknowledgement before they speed away.
29
DC's Metro conductors are definitely making the announcements. You can't get a computer to mumble like that. (Not that I begrudge them their soft tones and poor enunciation, what with their crappy hardware and all)
30
Except for curse words, sailor talk on trains is unacceptable. You're all like new parents to your train, you're thinking about this way too hard.
31
I'll give a couple reasons why the talking trains are necessary:
a) Most people who are accustomed to riding them tend to zone out. They'll be reading or snoozing and are only alerted to their stop by the voice.
b) On a crowded MAX (Portland's light rail), which is bound to have tourists and tards, directions are necessary so people to make way for those who are exiting.
c) Everyone would bitch otherwise. That's what you spoiled Pacific Northwesterners do.
a) Most people who are accustomed to riding them tend to zone out. They'll be reading or snoozing and are only alerted to their stop by the voice.
b) On a crowded MAX (Portland's light rail), which is bound to have tourists and tards, directions are necessary so people to make way for those who are exiting.
c) Everyone would bitch otherwise. That's what you spoiled Pacific Northwesterners do.
34
Also, something I forgot: Blind people sure do like to know which side of the train to alight from. Lots of otherwise unnecessary noises are there to help the blind out. This should end this thread.
38
I hate this about the light rail. What's so bad about, "Doors to the left", or "Doors will open on the right"?
It's just creepy and weird.
It's just creepy and weird.
39
I like the announcements in the German trains. "Ausstieg in Fahrtrichtung links." In English, 'exit to the left in the direction of travel.' Much better than personifying the train, or conductor, or whatever.
40
have you ever ridden an elevator that has doors on front and back but you don't realize that and you stand facing the door you came in thru but when the elevator stops the rear door is the one that opens and there you are standing in the back of the elevator facing the (now) back wall?
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