Find Your Valentine
Slog
News & ArtsSaturday, November 7, 2009
1
I love the guy framed in between their shoulders, it's something that can't be unseen.
Also, what about queer women?
Also, what about queer women?
2
God I love People Of Walmart. And nothing says "Oh GOD, how I secretly crave hard dicks" like a shirt loudly proclaiming you're not queer. Er, sorry, you "ain't queer".
4
he's like the arrow in the fedex logo, once you see it your eyes are magnetically attracted to it. or in this case him.
6
Although, the shirt does kind of imply that sexuality isn't a choice, rather that God makes some hetero and some homo. As a homo, I love beer and I'm pretty sure I really enjoyed titties as an infant.
8
Queers like beer, and what about man-boobs. I call bullshit, or should I say bull-shirt on that shirt.
10
Guaranteed: This shirt (and it's ilk) will be the height of hipster fashion within 3 years (it always starts with wolves howling at moons).
14
"Titties" and "Ain't" in red text denoting a mathematical negative . Hmmm there must be a connection between the two right? Black text is Beer = Good, Thank = Good, God = Good (when she behaves), Queer there fore being in Black also must = Good.
CHRIST it IS all about Math like I was told.
CHRIST it IS all about Math like I was told.
15
Actually, if you're "queer" and FEMALE, titties are sort of a big thing (no pun intended).
And beer is for everyone!
And beer is for everyone!
16
At our next family gathering I'm going to be wearing this shirt and informing my brother and sister that all the beer's mine.
17
Ahh yes, the gays are such a reliable punchline.
Let's hear it for the cheap jokes from "straight" men!
Let's hear it for the cheap jokes from "straight" men!
18
You can have man-titties if you like bears. Then you can change the tr-short to read:
"Bears and Beers, thank god I'm queer"
"Bears and Beers, thank god I'm queer"
21
Dan, please indulge baconcat his occasional indecipherable obsession. No one flies the flag higher for you, nor nips a critical ankle more efficiently.
26
Didn't you guys see "Bruno".
That's an ironical funny shirt from the "Straight Dave" segment.
But you guys took it literally -- as usual!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Rd-5uHiz…
30
I'd like to order one of each.
And I don't need a bag, I'll be eating them here. And no fries. I believe I'll be full shortly.
And I don't need a bag, I'll be eating them here. And no fries. I believe I'll be full shortly.
31
Supreme Ruler @ 26: As someone who's spent years of time pre-Bruno in the south, I can assure you that "titties and beer..." did not originate with Sacha Baron Cohen. Dollars to doughnuts this guy hasn't seen Bruno.
32
@31 the Zappa song is from like 76, and I'm pretty sure Zappa didn't invent either titties or beer.
33
There's something worse than people of Walmart.
They're called GOP congressmen.
They behave like 2 year olds.
http://thinkprogress.org/2009/11/07/gop-…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eMdlcnK_M…
I'm willing to bet a good portion of them are closet queers for as much as they hate women and gays.
They're called GOP congressmen.
They behave like 2 year olds.
http://thinkprogress.org/2009/11/07/gop-…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eMdlcnK_M…
I'm willing to bet a good portion of them are closet queers for as much as they hate women and gays.
34
As a point of information, the words on the shirt are from the Rodney Carrington song, "Titties and Beer" (he does the alternate version, "Wieners and Wine" as well). I believe the gist is supposed to be that these two things are so wonderful, thank the almighty that my sexual preference is such that I can fully appreciate them. He's a comedian who mostly plays to a redneck crowd and who does a few bits about sexual orientation that seem to me to be relatively benign. Of course, I'm straight, so your mileage may vary.
36
What is it with men? I once had a guy pour beer on my tits (without asking, while we were having sex) and he thought it was just the greatest thing. Meanwhile, I was thinking "this is why I prefer women!!!!"
37
@ 35 Freak Fail - I did not realize that "everyone" had penises, and that only men had "poopers." Or, that only men had penises put in their poopers.
Thanks for the lesson in stupidity.
Thanks for the lesson in stupidity.
38
@35
not everyone sticks their penises in other mens poopers, dan
learn to accept that
And some do. Learn to accept that. And grab some grammar along the way. It's "...everyone sticks HIS penis..." singular. If you'd be critical, at least be correct.
not everyone sticks their penises in other mens poopers, dan
learn to accept that
And some do. Learn to accept that. And grab some grammar along the way. It's "...everyone sticks HIS penis..." singular. If you'd be critical, at least be correct.
43
I am total agreement with this t-shirt. Thank God he's not queer. Although someone should tell him you can like titties and beer and still be queer. Needs to get out more.
45
@34 you aren't doing a very good job of being the smartest guy in the room. rodney was covering a zappa song, again, from at least 1976
48
@ 18: "You can have man-titties if you like bears."
Or if you like forty-year-old transgenders poking out of the Ingersoll Gender Clinic. Bonus points for those playing for implants with an IRA.
Or if you like forty-year-old transgenders poking out of the Ingersoll Gender Clinic. Bonus points for those playing for implants with an IRA.
50
I saw that entry a few days ago, and it angered me terribly. Thank you, Dan, for finding some humour about it.
51
Er, how about "Titties and bears, thank god I'm a queer!". It doesn't rhyme but it goes with the picture up above.
52
I believe I have missed a memo Dan on how to supply this man with titties, I am worried over this lack of responsibility and will report you to the containment division. None the matter since I will be more than happy to give this redneck some boy titties while I shove my cock up his straight ass all the while he shall stay STR8 while i make him beg for it. HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAH!!!!!
57
The random coloring of "titties" and "ain't" is confounding me. It's like misplaced quotation marks, only substantially weirder.
60
DAN FRED NAMACHO MAN SAVAGE
R U OFFNDED? R U WEEK N SAD? TRUST ME, U DEFINETLY GET TO BE AN IDJIT JUS LIKE THE STRAIGHT FOLKS. IT'S SO IMPORTANT THAT U CONTINUUU TO EXERHIZE THOSE RITES FOR GOOD OF NATION. FUCKING EDIT U OUT OF PIX? NAH WAY MANG, WE LETZ U HAVE SO MANY PIX.
TO THE SWEET LIL FISHIES:
DAGRINDER SHUT THE FUCK UP.
FNARF, I WILL GIVE YOU A CRAZY EURO FIT. HAVE YOU EVER HAD AN ELECTRICALLY INDUCED SPASM? IT'S ON BRO.
GRAMMAR CRACK HEADS GOOD GRAMMAR IS IMPORTANT IN EVERYDAY LIFE YOU SHOULD PRACTICE IT OR ELSE SPACE PUSSIES WILL TOTALLY CRUSH YOUR HEAD.
FRED SAVAGE, SAW NEW SOUTH PARK EPISODE, VERY TYPICAL, BUT YOU WERE TOTALLY IN IT! MR EDITOR LET ME IN!!!
R U OFFNDED? R U WEEK N SAD? TRUST ME, U DEFINETLY GET TO BE AN IDJIT JUS LIKE THE STRAIGHT FOLKS. IT'S SO IMPORTANT THAT U CONTINUUU TO EXERHIZE THOSE RITES FOR GOOD OF NATION. FUCKING EDIT U OUT OF PIX? NAH WAY MANG, WE LETZ U HAVE SO MANY PIX.
TO THE SWEET LIL FISHIES:
DAGRINDER SHUT THE FUCK UP.
FNARF, I WILL GIVE YOU A CRAZY EURO FIT. HAVE YOU EVER HAD AN ELECTRICALLY INDUCED SPASM? IT'S ON BRO.
GRAMMAR CRACK HEADS GOOD GRAMMAR IS IMPORTANT IN EVERYDAY LIFE YOU SHOULD PRACTICE IT OR ELSE SPACE PUSSIES WILL TOTALLY CRUSH YOUR HEAD.
FRED SAVAGE, SAW NEW SOUTH PARK EPISODE, VERY TYPICAL, BUT YOU WERE TOTALLY IN IT! MR EDITOR LET ME IN!!!
62
Just imagine what other cultures must think when they see "People of Wal-Mart" on the net. Wow - there is some seriously creepy shit there.
Why does everyone at SLOG feel it necessary to disparage those who think and believe differently? Like Rodney King said “Why can’t we all just get along?”
Why does everyone at SLOG feel it necessary to disparage those who think and believe differently? Like Rodney King said “Why can’t we all just get along?”
63
@45, as others have said, the song from which the t-shirt is a quote is not the zappa song, or a cover of the zappa song. both zappa and rodney carrington have songs called titties and beer, as it happens. it's something like, "titties and beer, thank god i aint queer... hunting two legged deer, titties and beer." the zappa song is about how the devil ate his gf and drank his beer.
64
There's one thing I'm missing here. Does Wal Mart even sell beer? Not that I'd be inclined to shop there even if they did--I doubt I could find Flying Dog's Dogtoberfest or Left Hand's Milk Stout there. Mmmm. Milk stout...almost as good as ""Wieners & Whiskey make me feel Frisky!"
66
mmmmmm, Frank Zappa...
He was straight, but that cover of Zoot Allures where he shows off his basket in those white jeans...
damn. I could learn to like beer for that.
He was straight, but that cover of Zoot Allures where he shows off his basket in those white jeans...
damn. I could learn to like beer for that.
67
People of Wal*Mart just makes me depressed. Lots of those pictures are of people who are clearly mentally ill/challenged. The rest of them are poor and ignorant.
68
What's wrong with the working class? If it wasn't for the working class, who would the middle class have to look down on? Not those fine, upstanding, wealthy men and women on Wall Street, that's for sure! You know, the ones who flushed our economy down the toilet?
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