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News & ArtsMonday, November 23, 2009
Savage Love SL Letter of the Day: Hot For Twinks
Posted by Dan Savage on Mon, Nov 23, 2009 at 1:44 PM
I love the podcast and column and just saw you live at UBC this weekend. Loved the part about how girls come on guys' faces all the time during oral—laughed about that all night.Anyway, I do have a question for you: I'm a hetero girl in my 20s. I love masturbating and find myself really good at it, but a lot of the time, I get nothing from hetero porn. Usually, it's because I can't stand the girls' annoying voices. So, I rely on gay porn instead, even when I'm reading erotica. I tend to go for what you gay guys call "twinks." (Who the hell is a "twink," technically speaking? Please don't tell me it's anything statuatory!) I'm not really concerned, I'm just curious: is this a common problem? I now get really intrigued when I meet gay guys in real life because I get off to so many gay men in porn. I would love to watch two twinks in reality at some point, but I'm not sure if any gay guys would ever be into that.
Twink Lover
P.S. Is your last name really Savage?
My response after the jump....
Twinks are commonly understood to be boyish gay men—that's boyish men, not boyish boys—in their late teens to mid-20s with slim-to-slightly muscular bodies and relatively hairless faces and/or chests. So long as you're getting your live-action porn from reputable porn sites and companies, TL, you don't have anything to worry about on the statutory front. Enjoy.
As for watching a couple of twinks go at it, there are lots of bisexual twinks out there—perhaps you could date one and have the odd threeway with another? There are also, without a doubt, gay dudes out there as turned on by the idea of some straight girl watching them go at it as you are turned on by the idea of watching two gay dudes go at it. And thanks to the World Wide Interfluffer, finding them—or renting them—is easier than ever.
And, yes, Savage is my real last name—my dad's last name is Savage, my siblings are all Savages, many of my aunts, uncles and cousins are Savages.
2
Words of power are killing me
While the sun displays it’s teeth.
All mockery is laughing
All violence is cheap.
She said...
"These are my guns.
These are my furs.
This is my living room.
You can play with me there sometimes
If you catch me in the mood."
Savage...
While the sun displays it’s teeth.
All mockery is laughing
All violence is cheap.
She said...
"These are my guns.
These are my furs.
This is my living room.
You can play with me there sometimes
If you catch me in the mood."
Savage...
5
I understood "Twink" to be related to the drug use amongst Gay men deriving for being tweaked out, high, etc. I'm sure there is a connection.
6
It's hard to believe that there are real women out there like "Twink Lover"...
but ever since i learned about the strange culture professed by some women especially those in Japan, the novels, drawing and etc then nothing really surprises me much. Still i believe this is more of a phase or a diminutive subculture fantasized by some women with unresolved issues and a distorted view of masculinity but as they grow older and see that it's going to led them nowhere they leave the distorted fantasy behind.
but ever since i learned about the strange culture professed by some women especially those in Japan, the novels, drawing and etc then nothing really surprises me much. Still i believe this is more of a phase or a diminutive subculture fantasized by some women with unresolved issues and a distorted view of masculinity but as they grow older and see that it's going to led them nowhere they leave the distorted fantasy behind.
7
i remember hearing that "twink" comes from "twinkie" - they are sweet yummy and go down easy, but you always regret it later...
8
@6
Sorry, but I am one of those "real women", and my boyfriend with his "slim-to-slightly muscular bodies and relatively hairless faces and/or chests." is quite happy about it.
Sorry, but I am one of those "real women", and my boyfriend with his "slim-to-slightly muscular bodies and relatively hairless faces and/or chests." is quite happy about it.
9
Men are beautiful, be they "twinks", "bears", "cubs", "jocks", etc. Damn, beautiful things. Positively delicious. I'm a woman, yes a real woman, but if I were a man, well then I'd want to be a gay man.
10
@ 6 - "as they grow older and see that it's going to led them nowhere they leave the distorted fantasy behind."
That is, unless she falls in love with a straight twinky guy who falls in love with her, and they live (relatively) happily forever after. Then Loveschild's head caves in.
That is, unless she falls in love with a straight twinky guy who falls in love with her, and they live (relatively) happily forever after. Then Loveschild's head caves in.
11
@7 recalling the definition from my alt.sex.motss days, I believe you are indeed right: twink does come from "twinkie," meaning they are golden brown (i.e. tanned) and full of tasty cream filling. The young, skinny and hairless aspect was implied by the original definition.
I'll also note that "twink" is probably the closest thing that bears have to a mortal insult. Although bears are generally far too laid back and fun-loving to really worry about it too much.
I'll also note that "twink" is probably the closest thing that bears have to a mortal insult. Although bears are generally far too laid back and fun-loving to really worry about it too much.
12
Loveschild:
And when are you growing out of your "distorted fantasy?" And speaking of unresolved issues, why do you hang around SLOG drooling heavily over Dan? (Not that he isn't worth drooling over !) But why would a conservative Christian woman visit SLOG all the time?
And when are you growing out of your "distorted fantasy?" And speaking of unresolved issues, why do you hang around SLOG drooling heavily over Dan? (Not that he isn't worth drooling over !) But why would a conservative Christian woman visit SLOG all the time?
15
Another real life woman here who "enjoys" gay porn with any manner of men in it. I'm married to a bear so I believe that mostly vouches for the straightness.
17
I am one of those "real women" who married a straight guy with a twinkish physique. I am perfectly happy, thank you. And I also like gay porn.
19
I don't like most mainstream porn with women in it because they're so obviously just working for a living. There is a lot of stuff in mainstream porn that - to my eyes at least - looks humiliating and degrading toward women, and I can't get off on that. I can relate too much.
So I much prefer watching men. And really, for a girl who likes dick, what's wrong with watching stuff where there are multiple dicks involved?
So I much prefer watching men. And really, for a girl who likes dick, what's wrong with watching stuff where there are multiple dicks involved?
20
@1 and @3 ftw. But @19 has a good point - the positive thing about gay pr0n for girls is that it's all dicks. Kind of like how het guys like lesbian pr0n.
21
I can't stand most women's voices in porn either, but what really gets me is that sound they make when sucking air through their teeth. It's like nails on a chalkboard to me.
22
One thing I've noticed is that gay porn is closer to real gay sex than straight porn is to real straight sex.
24
"Well, let's say this Twinkie represents the normal amount of psychokinetic energy in the New York area. Based on this morning's reading, it would be a Twinkie thirty-five feet long, weighing approximately six hundred pounds."
25
@19 Agreed. That's why the vast majority of the porn I watch is amateur (or at most, pro-amateur) or falls under the classic/vintage category. It's my personal philosophy that porn shouldn't have high production values. Even stuff from the 80s feels seedy by today's standards. The sex in today's hetero porn is sanitized and formulaic to the point that it just isn't sexy.
27
@19
Right there with you. There's a lot of us out there, I suspect. I could do without the extended butthole closeups (ick), but all in all the gay porn is exponentially better. Don't think I can ever go back to het porn - those chicks are naaaasty.
Right there with you. There's a lot of us out there, I suspect. I could do without the extended butthole closeups (ick), but all in all the gay porn is exponentially better. Don't think I can ever go back to het porn - those chicks are naaaasty.
28
I'm a girl who has always preferred gay porn, too. I'm not super-straight, so it's not like I mind seeing naked ladies. But raging hard-ons imply that the players aren't just in it for the paycheck.
Most girl-girl porn is of the horrific fake-nail & put-on moaning variety, but I've always enjoyed (pardon the expression) ultra-dykey low-budget porn and/or Nina Hartley/ Tristan Taormino scenes (with or without cock), where it's obvious that everyone is having a great time. I don't care if it's bears or twinks, butches or femmes, or even boys & girls-- so long as I'm watching people really get off.
Most girl-girl porn is of the horrific fake-nail & put-on moaning variety, but I've always enjoyed (pardon the expression) ultra-dykey low-budget porn and/or Nina Hartley/ Tristan Taormino scenes (with or without cock), where it's obvious that everyone is having a great time. I don't care if it's bears or twinks, butches or femmes, or even boys & girls-- so long as I'm watching people really get off.
30
Dude, even if you swing both ways, het porn ladies aren't sexy at all. In the immortal words of a hometown rap hero, I feel that silicone parts are made for toys.
32
Another real woman here who loves gay porn. And that site that Dan linked to above ("Super Twinks Exposed") looks promising. I'm going to have to visit that later... when I'm not at work.
33
Loveschild @ 6 - You and I DO have something in common. I'm a gay man that loves real he-man cock pounding me just as much as you do.
There. Seems we CAN find common ground.
There. Seems we CAN find common ground.
34
I'm chiming in with all the women here who love man-on-man action. Yum. Do as I did and go find yourself a fag-presenting bi boyfriend...
37
@6 Keep Fuckin that Chicken, Loveschild, KFTC. One of these days your ridiculous fantasy world will come true if you only believe hard enough.
38
@36 As well you should. Though the girl liking guy/guy is, I think, less about the threesome potential and more about guys being able to do stuff to each other that a girl couldn't do to a guy without the potential Slut label.
Or maybe that's just me. Conservative upbringing, etc.
Or maybe that's just me. Conservative upbringing, etc.
39
Just go to a college gay party and hang around til the drunken orgy starts. The straight girls usually ran for the hills when pants started dropping, but at more than one of my parties, a straight girl just stuck around quietly watching.
41
@5 nope. the word twink derives from the word twinkle and it's first recorded use to describe a sexually attractive young person young person was in 1963. the first recorded use of the word tweak was in 1966. also, there was also the slang word twank, which is interchangeable with twink in it's meaning and use amongst gay men of today, which was in used in england by the early 20's up until the 30's. it was not until the late 20's that amphetamine, a forerunner of methamphetamine, was made available to the public in the form of inhalers, to be used by people with asthma. before the late 20's people thought it would be a valuable medicine and for decades scientists tried to figure out what disease it could treat. etymology=fun!
42
Love the gay porn - like I explained it to my (het bear) husband "you know how a lot of guys think two women together are hot?" He's never had any problem with that. XD
Google on slash, ladies. But stay away from http://www.fanfiction.net unless you like teen girls writing it...
Google on slash, ladies. But stay away from http://www.fanfiction.net unless you like teen girls writing it...
43
@42
Eek, true statement. You'd think they'd know more about anal sex if they want to write about it.
Eek, true statement. You'd think they'd know more about anal sex if they want to write about it.
44
Why do you watch porn with twinks?
BECAUSE THE MEN IN STRAIGHT PORN ARE UGLY OLD BALD MEN.
Because women know exactly how uncomfortable and not fun most of the popular positions in porn are.
Because we know that face she's making means 'fuck, chipped a nail' not 'wow, this is fun'.
Because all the positions are chosen to hid the guys body (thankfully, since he's so effing ugly) which is what would interest girls (if he were hot).
BECAUSE THE MEN IN STRAIGHT PORN ARE UGLY OLD BALD MEN.
Because women know exactly how uncomfortable and not fun most of the popular positions in porn are.
Because we know that face she's making means 'fuck, chipped a nail' not 'wow, this is fun'.
Because all the positions are chosen to hid the guys body (thankfully, since he's so effing ugly) which is what would interest girls (if he were hot).
45
Like TL and some others here, I''m a straight woman who has always been attracted to the twink physique. @34 I'm happily married a bi twinkish guy. I agree with your advice completely! And man-on-man action is super hot!
46
I love twink porn, too. I can never identify with the women in straight porn (for all the reasons others listed above) but I can identify with twinks. Might be a difference to what people generally say about straight men watching lesbian porn: they want to have a go at both of the girls. I don't - I don't see myself in between the twinks but AS one of them.
In real life I'm not attracted to twinks at all but to tall men with a tiny bit of muscle & a not so tiny bit of extra padding (I know Dan is vomiting right know). I would say bears but I prefer them if they are not too hairy.
And what someone else said: I too like that in gay porn one can see if the bottom is aroused which translates in my head = he likes it. Strangely enough there's so much gay porn out there where the bottom doesn't have a hard on. Can men really enjoy being at the receiving end when not having a hard on? I usually think they are faking it then and go on to the next vid.
In real life I'm not attracted to twinks at all but to tall men with a tiny bit of muscle & a not so tiny bit of extra padding (I know Dan is vomiting right know). I would say bears but I prefer them if they are not too hairy.
And what someone else said: I too like that in gay porn one can see if the bottom is aroused which translates in my head = he likes it. Strangely enough there's so much gay porn out there where the bottom doesn't have a hard on. Can men really enjoy being at the receiving end when not having a hard on? I usually think they are faking it then and go on to the next vid.
47
Haha, I'm with @4, Harry/Draco FTW. Or any similar slash harry potter pairing for that matter. There's still too much stigma, though, about the whole thing, which is annoying as hell. And it doesn't seem to go away, too, unlike the men-and-lesbian-porn thing which is now the topic of every other joke on TV.
50
oh man, I totally agree with the writer. I find the girls in straight porn to be wicked annoying -- even if it's muted, which it usually is. I only watch gay porn and it's so much better! Also, many of the gay guys are just way more attractive. I totally wish I could find two of the described guys for a threesome...
51
Fantasies about raping 24 yo men who look like 18 (read: 15) yo boys are OK. And yet actually fucking a 15 yo, even if it's consensual, is NOT.
Let's keep deluding ourselves about our 'healthy' attitude toward sex.
Let's keep deluding ourselves about our 'healthy' attitude toward sex.
52
Half the men in homoporn are gay-for-pay, that is, good-looking exhibitionistic straight or bi boys out to experiment and make an extra buck, so twink lover could be in luck. Presumably she's checked out Sean Cody and Corbin Fisher which are filled with potential partners--the trick is to find them. Maybe she should schedule a trip to San Diego or Laguna.
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