The Sugarplum Elves are "a song-and-dance variety act that specializes in singing telegrams and seasonal entertainment," and they're up for bid right now in Strangercrombie! They'll even perform your customized routine, and right now they're going for just $51. A steal!
You can see them in action here and here.
Bid now, or have the most boring, song-and-danceless holiday season ever.
