On Monday, June 14, a 23-year-old male withdrew a large sum of money from an ATM machine and was allegedly violently mugged for every cent of it. A filed police report states that the young man withdrew $1,375 from an ATM on Northgate Way at the particularly non-ominous hour of 3:30 p.m. This large sum of money was intended as a deposit for a house he and his roommates were moving into that day on Greenwood Avenue North. The man secured it in an envelope. The police report states that he then placed the envelope in his back pocket (mistake! mistake!). He was walking to a bus stop on North East 95th Street when he allegedly felt something strike the back of his head. According to the report, the victim was knocked to the ground and landed on his stomach. While he was on the ground, the suspects allegedly began to kick him in the sides and rummage through his pockets, eventually finding and taking the fat envelope from his back pocket. The report states the victim had a wallet and a "non-working phone" inside his jacket pocket and "was able to retain these items by lying on his stomach." Phew! Good thing he saved that broken phone.

When the victim believed his attackers had left, he looked around and reportedly saw three males get into an "older, reddish, boxy, four-door Cadillac with nice rims and dark tinted windows." He was unable to describe their clothing or approximate ages. He did, however, state he could identify the vehicle (and its sweet rims) if he saw it again.

Watch out, Seattle: Cadillacs are fast becoming signature cars of crime.