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Friday, July 8, 2011

Film Cancel the Oscars

Posted by Anthony Hecht on Fri, Jul 8, 2011 at 6:00 PM

We have a winner.

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Rob Schneider is der de der.

Rob Schneider is a stapler.

Posted by pissy mcslogbot on July 8, 2011 at 6:18 PM

This still looks better than Mr. Popper's Penguins and Green Lantern.

Posted by Billy the Fridge on July 8, 2011 at 6:22 PM

I'll send you a bill for the bullet I'm about to use on myself after watching that

Posted by fsb on July 8, 2011 at 6:27 PM

Trollhunter was better.

Posted by Will in Seattle

on July 8, 2011 at 6:31 PM

not since Cabaret Vs The Godfather or even Avatar Vs The Hurt Locker, has there been such a tight race as Jack And Jill Vs The Zookeeper...

Posted by pissy mcslogbot on July 8, 2011 at 6:36 PM

"This November, Adam Sandler shits in your eyes, ears, and mouth. Rated Arrgh for Pirates. Fuck you."

South Park for the win.

Posted by Y

on July 8, 2011 at 6:52 PM

WHEN will the Sandman get the recognition he deserves?

Posted by Fnarf

on July 8, 2011 at 7:12 PM

Ok, that last joke was actually kinda funny.

Posted by OuterCow on July 8, 2011 at 7:21 PM

Kill me...someone kill me. And remember make sure BOTH of my hearts are damaged.

Good fucking shitting God!! I saved Earth from the Daleks and Cyberman for THIS SHIT!?!?!?!?!?!

Posted by Last of the Time Lords on July 8, 2011 at 7:23 PM

I actually laughed when the little kid wearing the dildo taped to his head hit the lady.

Posted by tjc on July 8, 2011 at 8:54 PM

That was horrific. What's the opposite of laughter? A soul-curdling cry of terror and disgust? That's what I just experienced.

Posted by leek on July 8, 2011 at 9:00 PM

Move over Peter Sellers, we have a new "Dr. Strangelove!"

Posted by mak on July 8, 2011 at 9:51 PM

I never thought I'd see Katie Holmes onscreen with Adam Sandler, let alone Adam Sandler in drag. I'm very surprised to realize that I prefer Adam Sandler, even with the drag.

Posted by Knat on July 8, 2011 at 10:56 PM

Finally! A headline I can get behind! Yes, let's cancel 'em!

Posted by TVDinner

on July 8, 2011 at 11:06 PM

Good Lord, who is the idiot that green lighted this thing?

Posted by Teslick on July 9, 2011 at 12:07 AM

Implausibly wealthy lifestyle? Gorgeous and picture-perfect Christmas conditions? I can totally relate to these characters!

Posted by Zebes

on July 9, 2011 at 2:52 AM

I liked the Al Pacino bit till I stopped liking it.

Posted by paulus on July 9, 2011 at 3:38 AM

Please let Lindy review this.

Posted by MichaelPgh

on July 9, 2011 at 7:27 AM

At least it ain't Julia Roberts and Tom Hanks.

Posted by seatackled on July 9, 2011 at 7:45 AM

Was that a man in a dress?

Posted by Sargon Bighorn on July 9, 2011 at 9:41 AM

Um, no. Just no. I'll watch Punch-Drunk Love again instead.

Posted by kevomatic on July 9, 2011 at 10:53 AM

I'm just going to assume that at the end, it turns out "Jill" is the Tyler Durden-like projection of Adam Sandler's long-suppressed female side, and the whole movie really has been about Adam's character coming out as a transexual all along.

Posted by Pope Buck I on July 9, 2011 at 11:10 AM

ok i kiiiiind of want to see it. i may or may not be stoned.

Posted by nixor on July 9, 2011 at 2:25 PM

@22 that would at least make it interesting.

Posted by veo_ on July 9, 2011 at 2:34 PM

I would absolutely watch this.

Posted by Amanda on July 9, 2011 at 10:36 PM

How does Adam Sandler sleep at night?

Oh, right -- on top of a giant pile of money.

He can also use some of it to dry his tears if he gets snubbed for an Oscar -- which I'm sure he's striving to win with every movie he makes.

Posted by Amanda on July 9, 2011 at 10:43 PM