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Monday, April 30, 2012

Animals Pretty Woman Bites Bulldog

Posted by Charles Mudede on Mon, Apr 30, 2012 at 10:24 AM

If only it were a pit bull:

A Lake in the Hills woman bit the family dog after returning home drunk over the weekend, police said Monday.

Analise J. Garner, 19, of the 300 block of Village Creek Drive, was charged with animal cruelty, domestic battery and underage drinking...

...Police said the family’s 80-pound English bulldog had three bite marks on its back. Puncture marks were visible against the dog’s white fur, police said.

The bulldog stood its ground and bit the pretty woman in self-defense.

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How is this not Florida?

Posted by the duster on April 30, 2012 at 10:53 AM

Why the inclusion of "pretty" in the headline? Is that supposed to alter our opinion of the woman? Would you not have posted this story if she were ugly to you? Are you surprised that a pretty woman could bite a dog? If it had instead been an attractive man, would you have included that detail in the headline?

Posted by Allyn on April 30, 2012 at 11:00 AM

She is NOT pretty. She is beyond ugly.

Posted by Cracker Jack on April 30, 2012 at 11:01 AM

A debate on women in SLOG...complete waste of time.

She's totally hot.

Posted by Supreme Ruler Of The Universe

on April 30, 2012 at 11:07 AM

Clearly we should ban pretty women. They're far too dangerous.

Posted by Sousaphone Colossus on April 30, 2012 at 11:14 AM

I agree @5. They are dangerous and can not be controlled. Pretty women, Pit Bulls, and Visigoths.

Posted by espato on April 30, 2012 at 11:45 AM

So if I bred a pit bull with a pug to give it that ugly squashed face (that's why bulldogs now look that way; they used to look pretty much like pit bulls) and the subsequent health ailments that should make any bio-ethicist cringe, would it suddenly be a sympathetic animal?

Posted by Zuulabelle