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Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Alleged Superhero Phoenix Jones... Framed??!

Posted by on Tue, May 1, 2012 at 5:27 PM

What, this cannister of pepper spray? This is just a prop.
  • Baconcat
  • "What, this can of pepper spray?"
Goldy, Paul, and I talked to a few people today who claimed to be part of a crowd that was blanketly pepper sprayed in the face by Phoenix Jones.


<—-Here's Jones, pictured posing downtown this morning with a big-ass can of pepper spray.

But Jones, who was arrested by police last fall for allegedly pepper spraying another group of innocent bystanders, vehemently denies that he unleashed his spray today:

"I NEVER PEPPER SPRAYED ANYONE I DID GET SPRAYED BY ANARCHIST 'PROTESTER' OCCUPY IS OK BUT ROITS [sic] ARE NOT," the self-proclaimed superhero writes on Twitter.

But if not Jones, then who? Could it be that Jones was framed? By a new villain in town?? Mayhap by the people's villain??!



For all our sakes, I fucking hope so. Rex Velvet, you're a desperate city's only hope.

 

Comments (22) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment
Kinison 1
Baconcat got pepper sprayed? HAHAHAHAHA FUCKING AWESOME!!

Where was this at? Alot of the pussyass coward anarchists broke off and started rampaging once the group had gathered at westlake. What was Baconcat doing following these idiots? Or was he part of the group of idiots smashing windows in the name of siring up a shit storm?
Posted by Kinison http://www.holgatehawks.com on May 1, 2012 at 6:20 PM · Report this
Wicked Virgin 2
I might be down with Rex Velvet. What do his henchmen uniforms look like?
Posted by Wicked Virgin http://goo.gl/nBxVY on May 1, 2012 at 6:23 PM · Report this
3
If Rex were to drop the community theater Brit accent I would hench him most loyally.
Posted by gloomy gus on May 1, 2012 at 6:30 PM · Report this
TVDinner 4
@1: Someday someone is going to give you an antifreeze milkshake, and you'll just slurp it down. May it happen soon.
Posted by TVDinner http:// on May 1, 2012 at 6:31 PM · Report this
5
check out the video footage on king 5. about halfway through
theres a guy dressed up in a super hero outfit clearly spraying people with pepper spray. Maybe theres more than one ? probably another guy in PJs posse.
Posted by porchedge on May 1, 2012 at 6:37 PM · Report this
6
Welp, there goes the neighborhood. I'm moving to Canada. It's too cold up there for idiots to ponce about in spandex.
Posted by quicksilver on May 1, 2012 at 7:02 PM · Report this
7
Jones is a tool.

http://gawker.com/5906799
Posted by Agrippa on May 1, 2012 at 7:58 PM · Report this
disintegrator 8
Guys, I know that Phoenix Jones is a tool and all, but I for one am fucking tickled pink that this is the kind of shit that happens in my city.
Posted by disintegrator on May 1, 2012 at 8:09 PM · Report this
9
I have it on video, be it shitty filming
Posted by nsgob22 on May 1, 2012 at 8:16 PM · Report this
WFM 10
I for one am enjoying this episode tremendously. Fuckin' love this town.
Posted by WFM on May 1, 2012 at 8:48 PM · Report this
11

It's like the Occupy Protestors competing with the knife wielding psycho-bums for Best Able to Scare Any Normal Person from downtown.

Posted by Supreme Ruler Of The Universe http://_ on May 1, 2012 at 10:04 PM · Report this
Baconcat 12
@1: I went to take photos. I had a classmate with me, we were down there taking in the action. Just happened to get in the middle of a pepper spray snit fit, it was actually pretty interesting. Everyone got all heated up and they all threw a capsaicin tantrum.

I didn't smash anything, I actually couldn't afford the time suck involved in doing a runner after petty vandalism. I had a civics club to organize, philosophy to study and a date night with a lovely Mrs. Baconcat to worry about.

I'm not going to apologize for having an interesting life and I really appreciate your sloppy salami-pounding on account of me. It's the little things, really. :)
Posted by Baconcat on May 1, 2012 at 11:04 PM · Report this
bedipped 13
When criminals in this world don't fear
The Superhero's underwear
or his pepperspray so dear
The cry goes up both far and near
Fuck Phoenix Jones. Phoenix Jones! Phoenix Jones. Phoenix Jones!

Speed of Lite Brite, roar of chunder
Spraying all who fight or plunder
Phoenix Jones. Phoenix Jones!

When in this world Seattle streets
are filled with black bloc's smashing day
The only PJs they will meet
to right this wrong with blinding spray
is Phoenix Jones. Phoenix Jones! Phoenix Jones. Phoenix Jones!

Killing eyesight, pour of chunder
Spraying all who fight or plunder
Phoenix Jones. Phoenix Jones!
Posted by bedipped on May 2, 2012 at 12:45 AM · Report this
California Kid 14
Phoenix Jones- Threat or Menace?
Posted by California Kid on May 2, 2012 at 6:50 AM · Report this
Theodore Gorath 15
@1: Wow, look at you reveling in the possible pains of your fellow man.

You are quite a scumbag.
Posted by Theodore Gorath on May 2, 2012 at 7:25 AM · Report this
Lissa 16
@13: You. Are fabulous.
@12: Baconcat I'm so glad you're ok! I have to say when I heard about it I was worried about you, but I also thought it was so you.
"Get pepper sprayed by the police? Bah! How banal! I'm Baconcat! Only a Super Hero will do!"
@1: To quote your own favorite "thinker": Grow up.
Posted by Lissa on May 2, 2012 at 9:36 AM · Report this
Tom X 17
I've looked at the evidence. That is BIZARRO Phoenix Jones.

Ironically, the Bizarro version of Jones does not communicate in capslocked texts.
Posted by Tom X on May 2, 2012 at 2:39 PM · Report this
18
You stupid fucks live in fantasy land.
I have never seen such stupid people in my life.

The police dress up as anarchists and cause havoc on the streets in the MayDay Riots just so the Seattle police department can recieve more money and you idoits don not have anything better to do then dress up as superheros and play stupid games while your city is defrauding the state of tax payer money.

If you want a real hero to cling on to then cling on to Ron Paul.
At least Ron Paul is authentic and real.
Posted by Kent on May 2, 2012 at 3:59 PM · Report this
19
You stupid fucks live in fantasy land.
I have never seen such stupid people in my life.

The police dress up as anarchists and cause havoc on the streets in the MayDay Riots just so the Seattle police department can recieve more money and you idoits don not have anything better to do then dress up as superheros and play stupid games while your city is defrauding the state of tax payer money.

If you want a real hero to cling on to then cling on to Ron Paul.
At least Ron Paul is authentic and real.
Posted by Kent on May 2, 2012 at 4:00 PM · Report this
20
Is that a space needle bottle opener? Where do I get one?
Posted by amsellie on May 2, 2012 at 7:39 PM · Report this
Tom X 21
#18:lol no
Posted by Tom X on May 12, 2012 at 11:34 AM · Report this
Tom X 22
It's typical of a Ron Paul supporter to post that same stupid thing twice. Good work.
Posted by Tom X on May 12, 2012 at 11:36 AM · Report this

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