Today in big douches: Romney asks Florida's governor to simmer down about economic improvements his state has seen. Why? "because they clash with the presumptive Republican nominee’s message that the nation is suffering under President Barack Obama."
Guns don't kill people, but wildfires might! Target shooters set off a big wildfire in Utah. Of course, "(Governor) Herbert called on shooters to self-regulate, since legislation bars sheriffs from banning firearms." This looks like a classic case of freedom to shoot dry grass vs. freedom to not have your house burned.
Traffic in Seattle: It's gonna be all fucked up because of runners and queers.
Syria violence is scary: Now, they shot a turkey! Turkish fighter jet. Things are so screwey that Iraq is frightened. IRAQ. That place we said was the worst place in the world...is scared.
Probably Unconstitutional: Saving the lives of 72 Americans who will die today because they lack health insurance. USA! USA!
EDITED: Since a startled dog is more offensive than a potential genocide, bad traffic, child molesters, dying poor people, and political corruption COMBINED, the video is down. Cen-sor-ship! Cen-sor-ship!
Thanks to some of the more colorful comments:
Tomorrow's video will be as unoffensive as possible - got ideas? Send them to firstname.lastname@example.org