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Friday, June 29, 2012

A Text Message From Terry

Posted by on Fri, Jun 29, 2012 at 3:08 PM

OMG. A grown gay man wearing Crocs. What is the world coming to? And in public!

Know that guy?

No. Just some random gay at Pags. So upsetting.

Cute from behind. Nice butt. Naturally perky? Or Crocs give him that lift?

Naturally. You'd love him. Totally your type.

Thanks for the pic.


Comments (51) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment
may i recommend the crocs flip flops?

comfy and not nearly as ugly
Posted by judybrowni on June 29, 2012 at 3:12 PM · Report this
@1, no, you may not.
Posted by gloomy gus on June 29, 2012 at 3:20 PM · Report this
Dougsf 3
I'm seconding @2, In case this requires a 2/3rds majority.
Posted by Dougsf on June 29, 2012 at 3:42 PM · Report this
brandon 4
Is this how monogamish starts? A text about a hot if tragically footed piece of ass?
Posted by brandon on June 29, 2012 at 3:49 PM · Report this
Afreet 5
Crocs, flip flops or otherwise, are the worst thing to happen to footwear, since, well, ever.
Posted by Afreet on June 29, 2012 at 3:54 PM · Report this
Allyn 6
@5 I argue that concrete is the worst thing to happen to footwear.
Posted by Allyn on June 29, 2012 at 4:00 PM · Report this
rob! 7
I'm going to repeat my sentiment from, oh, two-and-a-half-years-ago, because it hasn't changed: "Oh, blow me, Croc haterz. If I'm not barefoot I'm in my Crocs. It's all about the comfort; I'm not concerned with your contempt."

I can suit up and slick down with the best of 'em, and that includes tasteful (non-elf-tip) shoes, when the occasion calls for it. Home, and Home Depot, and Safeway, the local feed-and-ranch, and even the local roadhouse, do not fall into that category. Fuck all y'all who feel otherwise.
Posted by rob! on June 29, 2012 at 4:14 PM · Report this
@7, heart, it's not that I believe you oughtn't be free to wear them when and where you damn well please, so long as you agree I'm free to have a vigorous opinion about the way they sting my eyes like a million bees. I'd never say a word to a person wearing them. I'm judgmental and crass mostly just here.
Posted by gloomy gus on June 29, 2012 at 4:36 PM · Report this
I'm with @7. I'd also like to say the same thing in defense of wearing Five-Fingers. Screw you bitches... I do what I want.
Posted by pheeeew!crack!boom! on June 29, 2012 at 4:44 PM · Report this
like i said, as comfortable as athletic shoes, which i think are uglee, esp. on women…
Posted by judybrowni on June 29, 2012 at 4:47 PM · Report this
I endorse footwear freedom. You can do what you want.

However. You can also look like a total goober doing what you want.
Posted by tkc on June 29, 2012 at 4:53 PM · Report this
tainte 12
OMG, a grown man texting and using OMG.
Posted by tainte on June 29, 2012 at 5:22 PM · Report this
Soupytwist 13
Terry might be my new favorite. Sorry, The Adrian Ryan!
Posted by Soupytwist on June 29, 2012 at 5:28 PM · Report this
Catalina Vel-DuRay 14
I have crocs, and I don't care who knows it. I will wear them to the Red Apple, but I would never wear them to the QFC.
Posted by Catalina Vel-DuRay on June 29, 2012 at 5:31 PM · Report this
delirian 15
@7: Relax. It is not like we are saying that people who wear Crocs should be thrown in jail due to the damage they are causing to our eyes.

Not yet at least.

But think of the children you are hurting!
Posted by delirian on June 29, 2012 at 5:52 PM · Report this
TVDinner 16
I saw a generously-proportioned man in at the grocery store wearing a fanny pack today. He had lovely hair and a cheerful smile, which made the fanny pack that much more depressing.

Then again, I *do* live in Spokane.
Posted by TVDinner http:// on June 29, 2012 at 6:12 PM · Report this
Crocs may be ugly, but when you have bad knees, they're amazing.

This has been a public service announcement. We now return to our regularly-scheduled hilarity.
Posted by Chakolate on June 29, 2012 at 6:42 PM · Report this
brian 18
Oh my god that's my best friend! This is so disturbing, the only defense i can offer is that he went to a small libeal arts college that kind of shit never wears offs.
Posted by brian on June 29, 2012 at 6:59 PM · Report this
If he's a hospital orderly and just out of work, then maybe he gets a pass. Otherwise, no.
Posted by madcap on June 29, 2012 at 7:13 PM · Report this
rob! 20
Ha, Gus @8 (and @15 while I'm at it), I'm just being a yappy Pomeranian. For what it's worth (not much), you have a permanent dispensation from me for anything you might say on any subject—because of the regularity with which you turn issues inside out, deliver parsimoniously worded comeuppance, and shake on a little historical seasoning.
Posted by rob! on June 29, 2012 at 8:11 PM · Report this
KingofQueenAnne 21
Seriously, you gotta stop just posting pictures of strangers and passersby on your popular and nationally read blog whenever your fancy strikes. It's just bad form. Some bitch is ugly on one of your flights? Some girl's ass crack is hanging out when she bends over? Well A.) we don't care, and B.) none of these people are public figures and probably weren't expecting to be laughingstocks all over the Internet just because they ventured out of their home for six minutes to grab a bite. Maybe he had a broken toe? Jesus.

We're your neighbors, and maybe we should start whipping out our cameras every chance we get when you give my boyfriend the stink eye at Vivace (because he doesn't have a size 28 waist?) or when you're grunting and squatting and sweaty at Golds Gym at 3pm with your Asian twink friend of yours. At least we'd be halfway justified—you do fancy yourself a public figure, after all.
Posted by KingofQueenAnne on June 29, 2012 at 8:30 PM · Report this
I wonder how well recognized Dan is. I would pretend to not know.
Posted by floater on June 29, 2012 at 8:36 PM · Report this
@20, that's worth a lot coming from you! Rock out wtih your Crocs out!
Posted by gloomy gus on June 29, 2012 at 8:40 PM · Report this
I second @17. Nothing feels as good as Crocs when you have certain knee and foot problems because they're so excellent at shock absorption. Some of the new sandals they've put out are actually not that hideous, thank god. I'm still embarrassed to wear them, but the pain relief is worth it.
Posted by bibliomystic on June 29, 2012 at 9:14 PM · Report this
very bad homo 25
I've never used the phrase "He's hot from the ankles up" but now I understand a situation in which I might.
Posted by very bad homo on June 29, 2012 at 9:16 PM · Report this
@21 oh please. In case you haven't heard glamour magazine has been doing this for years: so it's not unreasonable for Dan to snark on fashion too. Fashion snark happens, get over it.
Posted by PenguinGirl on June 29, 2012 at 9:43 PM · Report this
@26 yes, but its also pathetic.
Posted by pokey on June 29, 2012 at 9:58 PM · Report this
I heard that Crocs is a big GOP supporting company. just saying.
Posted by crocsforvoldemort on June 29, 2012 at 10:38 PM · Report this
ScrawnyKayaker 29
@16 The fanny pack probably contained a pistol. They're great for looking like a harmless dork while packing, and they'll swallow chubbier guns than can easily be hidden under light clothing. Be afraid.
Posted by ScrawnyKayaker on June 30, 2012 at 12:18 AM · Report this
Swear to god I thought that was Dan in the photo before I read it.
Posted by Up all night on June 30, 2012 at 12:21 AM · Report this
I thought that, too.
Posted by migrationist on June 30, 2012 at 1:10 AM · Report this
DOUG. 32
How do we know he's gay?
Posted by DOUG. on June 30, 2012 at 1:15 AM · Report this
For this out of towner: what the hell is "Pags"?
Posted by Velvetbabe on June 30, 2012 at 4:22 AM · Report this
Bauhaus I 34
@30 and 31:

You're kind of justified in thinking that. That does look like DHS circa 1991. Don't know if you'd have seen him in Crocs though had they existed. When he wasn't Helvetica, he was more a Doc Marten's boot kind of guy.
Posted by Bauhaus I on June 30, 2012 at 4:23 AM · Report this
Impossible. In 1991, he couldn't have been a day older than 10.
Posted by migrationist on June 30, 2012 at 5:15 AM · Report this
I like to think he was just stopping for a snack on the way to buying new shoes, his old pair having been tragically destroyed somehow.
Posted by MichelleZB on June 30, 2012 at 6:43 AM · Report this
terrence 37
theyre ugly as F, but i do wear them around the house and at the beach on occasion. the only time i wear them in public is if i have to run to the corner store and even them i put on my DARK shades.
Posted by terrence on June 30, 2012 at 7:20 AM · Report this
Hold on, hold on, this guy clearly only does hack squats or leg press, he's all quads with no hamstrings and no glutes.

What's WRONG with the world!?
Posted by stephen.g on June 30, 2012 at 7:45 AM · Report this
thecheesegirl 39
I would just like to say that that is not what I'd call a "cute butt". I prefer guys with more of a bubble-butt going on, or, as my husband calls it, "non-imploding-star ass".
Posted by thecheesegirl on June 30, 2012 at 8:03 AM · Report this
Cato the Younger Younger 40
@33, Pagliaci Pizza on Broadway
Posted by Cato the Younger Younger on June 30, 2012 at 8:31 AM · Report this
keksutaja 41
An estonian proverb for you: narri meest, mitte mehe mütsi (make fun of the man, not of his hat, or footwear in this case). I would unpack it as: let a man's actions define his worth, not his appearance.
Posted by keksutaja on June 30, 2012 at 10:35 AM · Report this
Yeah, this is sad. @21 agreed. Not the place for this when there is so much that is more important, and less stupid. The field day on the crocs is abysmally boring. I'm guessing Dan was trying to point out the fun and freedom of a respectful monogamish relationship. That sloggers took it as an opportunity to slag someone's fashion at a pizza joint (send pictures! so we can see how awesome y'all look day in day out!) is kind of par for the course lately. Bored, angry people.
Posted by secretchord on June 30, 2012 at 5:08 PM · Report this
Gus 43
He's cute. His butt could be better defined, but if you go for the slightly lanky type, you don't always get amazing asses -- it's a cute ass, but not amazining.

And I hope Terry got the guy's number for Dan.
Posted by Gus on June 30, 2012 at 6:22 PM · Report this
the meaning of 'nice butt' must change as one approaches 50...
Posted by what rich full lives you lead on June 30, 2012 at 7:08 PM · Report this
fannerz 45
The thing that bothers me the most is the blue pants/blue shoes combo. If they were black crocs it would be less bad. Still terrible, but less so.
Posted by fannerz on June 30, 2012 at 9:50 PM · Report this
sissoucat 46
Dan & Terry - That's a loving relationship if I've ever seen one.
Posted by sissoucat on July 1, 2012 at 1:19 AM · Report this
@30: I thought that was Dan, too. I thought T had caught D out and about in Crocs so snapped a pic and the 2 of them were just joking around, pretending it was someone else. Man, I'm reading too much into this shit.
Posted by Hoover Constellation on July 1, 2012 at 2:52 PM · Report this
That's considered a perky butt?? Wow, I need to text you more pics, Dan.
Posted by The fag on July 2, 2012 at 6:08 AM · Report this
smajor82 49
Are straight men the only social group with the luxury of not giving a fuk what they look like sometimes, dressing comfortably on the weekends even out in public (gasp!), and not having catty bitches talk about them behind their backs? Equality ought to come with more than just a marriage license. Can't a guy like dik without buying into all the gay cultural stereotypes?
Posted by smajor82 on July 2, 2012 at 9:49 AM · Report this
Alanmt 50
The current fashion in men's jeans is not designed to showcase the butt.
Posted by Alanmt on July 2, 2012 at 10:30 AM · Report this
sissoucat 51
@49 Straight men are indeed the only social group conceited enough to "not give a fuck what they look like". White straight men in particular. What dorks.

There is a reason why many straight women, like myself, love to take a good look at un-straight men - it won't lead to sex, which is a plus since being preyed upon just for a look is not that fun, and they do not look like pigs. Apologies to all pigs around for the hurtful comparison.
Posted by sissoucat on July 3, 2012 at 2:30 AM · Report this

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