Are you fucking kidding me with this Jack Reacher trailer? That reverse-Mission: Impossible theme music is shameless. A super-duper-intense Tom Cruise spitting out crappy lines like, "you think I'm a hero? I am not a hero...I have nothing to lose" is even more embarrassing than, like, a real actor trying to pretend anyone would really say those lines. And the whole thing is a terrible cliche. If trailers are a showcase of the best a movie has to offer, this movie might be stupendously awful.

Normally, I run a poll after these trailers asking what you think. Not this time: Jack Reacher's trailer is apocalyptically bad. If you disagree with me, you're probably a Scientologist.