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Wednesday, September 26, 2012

In Memoriam: BACON

Posted by on Wed, Sep 26, 2012 at 2:43 PM

The unthinkable will soon be a reality.

The droughts that ravaged crops across North American and Russia have had a huge impact on the food supply, livestock and farmers but now it may be time to hit the “panic” button – one pig group is predicting a BACON SHORTAGE.

“A world shortage of pork and bacon next year is now unavoidable,” the National Pig Association in the UK said this week.

And so... a moment of silence... for bacon.

Rest in peace, homie.

 

Comments (30) RSS

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1
Shortage of bacon might actually be the only thing that will inspire some people to realize that climate change is real.

Or maybe God just really hates pigs.
Posted by Mike in Olympia on September 26, 2012 at 2:53 PM · Report this
Posted by schmacky on September 26, 2012 at 2:54 PM · Report this
Zebes 3
Holy shit! What are we going to do?! Oh, wait, we'll just replace our endless irritating "BACON IS SO DELICIOUS OH MY GOD" memes with "OH MY GOD BACON SHORTAGE WHAT THE FUCK" memes.
Posted by Zebes http://www.badrap.org/rescue/index.html on September 26, 2012 at 2:56 PM · Report this
Cato the Younger Younger 4
If we have a bacon shortage I are going to fucking nuke someone. I don't know who but someone is going to be vaporized off the planet.

I think there was some bacon on sale at Safeway..is it okay to freeze bacon?
Posted by Cato the Younger Younger on September 26, 2012 at 2:57 PM · Report this
Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn 5
Going on and on about bacon on the internet is so cool.
Posted by Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn http://youtu.be/zu-akdyxpUc on September 26, 2012 at 3:00 PM · Report this
6
Please, I'm begging you, shut the fuck up about bacon.
Posted by Chchchchch on September 26, 2012 at 3:02 PM · Report this
biffp 7
Tough shit meat eaters. Thanks for ruining the fucking planet.
Posted by biffp on September 26, 2012 at 3:04 PM · Report this
COMTE 8
What @2 said.

There's been some reduction of stocks here in the U.S. due to the ongoing drought conditions in the midwest, which has depleted feed sources, and which may result in slightly higher prices during the winter/spring. But otherwise, bacon will still be in plentiful supply, so DON'T FUCKING PANIC!
Posted by COMTE on September 26, 2012 at 3:12 PM · Report this
Matt from Denver 9
@ 4, as long as it hasn't been frozen and thawed already, it's fine to freeze any meat.
Posted by Matt from Denver on September 26, 2012 at 3:19 PM · Report this
--MC 10
Let's mourn our baconless lives with a SONG. Sing it over and over again!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fDrMGqSSK…
Posted by --MC on September 26, 2012 at 3:23 PM · Report this
mikethehammer 11
@9,

I freeze, thaw & refreeze meat pretty regularly (even occasionally, if rarely, doing the cycle a couple more times before finally getting around to cooking it.) Is that bad/dangerous?
Posted by mikethehammer on September 26, 2012 at 3:24 PM · Report this
Posted by Jenerate http://jenniferltowner.com on September 26, 2012 at 3:27 PM · Report this
Sir Vic 13
@2 I knew something was off when I read the original story. The Pork Council of America (or whoever) has been pushing bacon down the US throat for 5 or 6 years now, which was clearly a push to sell their glut of pork products. If there was a shortage on the horizon, they wouldn't have had the massive ad campaigns the past years.

Also, pig will eat ANYTHING. Lack of corn or soy doesn't matter.
Posted by Sir Vic on September 26, 2012 at 3:28 PM · Report this
treacle 14
I can't wait until beef goes up to $25/lb. When it does:

Rabbit: The new beef.

You heard it here first.
Posted by treacle on September 26, 2012 at 3:37 PM · Report this
Zebes 15
@13

You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together. And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig".
Posted by Zebes http://www.badrap.org/rescue/index.html on September 26, 2012 at 3:42 PM · Report this
16
So . . . what does this do to the Six Degrees of Separation thesis?
Posted by RonK, Seattle on September 26, 2012 at 4:00 PM · Report this
Pope Peabrain 17
So we're going to have to eat Chris Christie?
Posted by Pope Peabrain on September 26, 2012 at 4:08 PM · Report this
Sir Vic 18
@15 Thank you, Bricktop. Now about that caravan with the periwinkle blue curtains....
Posted by Sir Vic on September 26, 2012 at 4:16 PM · Report this
19
No Bacon? Well there is always foie gras and eggs.
Posted by Senor Guy on September 26, 2012 at 4:22 PM · Report this
Matt from Denver 20
@ 11, it just usually results in poorer quality meat because the ice crystals tear at the cell structure. Meat can take that a lot better than fruits and veggies, but it's still noticeable.

The only thing that would be dangerous is if you're letting it sit in the "danger zone" (40º-140º F) for long when you thaw. Do you thaw in the fridge, then refreeze? No problem. Do you thaw by letting it sit on your counter? You might be playing with fire there. Granted, thorough cooking (typically up to 170º internal temp) should kill anything, but then you've got a whole other issue of quality on your hands with most meat.
Posted by Matt from Denver on September 26, 2012 at 4:23 PM · Report this
Will in Seattle 21
We'd be fine for bacon if we just ended the artificial corn subsidies, allowed cane sugar imports and cane sugar ethanol imports, and removed the artificial corn ethanol requirements.

But that would be letting Capitalism win, instead of Socialized Plutocracy.

BACON!
Posted by Will in Seattle http://www.facebook.com/WillSeattle on September 26, 2012 at 4:33 PM · Report this
Will in Seattle 22
@14 for the Green Lake Is The Other White Meat Win of the Day!
Posted by Will in Seattle http://www.facebook.com/WillSeattle on September 26, 2012 at 4:34 PM · Report this
23
OK, maybe it's just me, but I think it's incredibly offensive that the video uses the Clapton song about the death of his toddler son to sell bacon.
No, it's not just me, it's offensive in a universally cosmic way. Enjoy your bacon.
Posted by crone on September 26, 2012 at 6:51 PM · Report this
24
@23
Not too bright are you.
Posted by Senor Guy on September 26, 2012 at 7:04 PM · Report this
25
That looks especially yummy after Yom Kippur has just ended.
Posted by sarah70 on September 26, 2012 at 8:42 PM · Report this
26
@24 Yes, I'm quite bright. Why do you say that?
Posted by crone on September 26, 2012 at 8:50 PM · Report this
27
@26
Here is a hint:
I hate to burst your bubble, but it is not a commercial.
Posted by Senor Guy on September 26, 2012 at 9:16 PM · Report this
28
Let them eat soy bacon.
Posted by LizzieVeg on September 26, 2012 at 10:37 PM · Report this
wilbur@work 29
7 - You're welcome!

Humans, Rabbit, Timberwolf, whatever, as long as Nueske's gets their hands on it first.
Posted by wilbur@work on September 26, 2012 at 11:12 PM · Report this
watchout5 30
one of the dumbest things anyone's ever written
Posted by watchout5 http://www.overclockeddrama.com on September 27, 2012 at 3:18 AM · Report this

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