Car Bomb in Beirut: Eight dead and at least 78 injured.

Malala Yousufzai Is Able to Stand: The young Pakistani girl shot in the head by the Taliban can stand and write, and is "not out of the woods yet," but "doing very well."

More Good News: The Canadian Border Guard who was shot earlier this week has taken her first steps since the shooting.

Have You Gotten Your Ballot Yet?: Our endorsements and voting cheat sheet are RIGHT HERE!

Another Ones Bites the Dust (And by 'Bites the Dust' I Mean 'Gets Arrested'): "U.S. authorities said a man arrested in San Diego on child pornography charges was linked to a plot by a Bangladeshi man to set off a bomb at the Federal Reserve Bank of New York, the New York Times reported."

Cheater!: A man working for the Virginia Republican party was arrested after allegedly throwing out voter registration forms—he "faces 13 felony and misdemeanor counts relating to voter fraud, including one count of obstruction of justice, four counts of destruction of voter registration applications and eight counts of disclosure of voter registration applications."

LOL: President Obama and Romney made jokes at the Al Smith dinner. I wonder if Mitt resurected his joke about how it'd be easier to win the election if he were Latino. HAR HAR! He's such a goof.

PUPPIES!: A 10-year-old boy got lost in the woods and was kept warm overnight by PUPPIES. Awwww!

Starbucks Has Opened in Mumbai: They'll offer Elaichi Mawa croissants and tandoori paneer rolls.

Hockey Talks Continue: There was a meeting between the NHL and the NHLPA in Toronto yesterday that LEAD TO NOWHERE. The longer this continues, the more obvious it is that both sides are spoiled fucking babies and if they don't play hockey soon, I'm going to become a fucking baseball fan. Okay? How about that!? GET ON THE ICE, MILLIONAIRES.

GRRL Army Paints Again: An abandoned hotel on Aurora is now pink.

Tom Hanks Said "Fucking" on Good Morning America: Oops.

"I liked going in and making people really mad...": Reddit's most prolific troll, Violentacres, AKA Michael Brutsch, was interviewed on CNN last night, his first interview since his identity was revealed last week.