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Friday, October 26, 2012

Vote for Jesus!

Posted by on Fri, Oct 26, 2012 at 3:50 PM

Bill Keller, founder of the Internet ministry, claims that over 1.4 million evangelical Christians have pledged to vote for Jesus in the November presidential election. Why?

If President Obama is re-elected, his anti-American, socialist policies will continue, as will his attacks on Christianity and Christian churches. He will continue to support abortion, homosexuality, the enemies of Israel. How can a true follower of Christ vote in good conscience for a man who has proven to be a true enemy of God and His Word and will continue to be so in his next term?

If Mitt Romney is elected, he will be the fulfillment of his cult's polygamist, pedophile, racist, con artist, murdering founder Joseph Smith's "White Horse" prophecy that Romney and all Mormon's believe. That prophecy says that the United States will facing great economic and social unrest, a Mormon will be elected President, declare a national emergency and set aside the US Constitution and enact a Mormon theocracy. That may sound impossible, but ever since he was at BYU, Romney was called by his inner circle "the chosen one" to fulfill their cult's prophecy.

As Keller reminds us, "the lesser of two evils is still EVIL!" So if you are a conservative, evangelical Christian, by all means: Vote for Jesus. Please, please... write in Jesus! All conservative Christians should follow their faith and vote for Jesus!

[via alternet]


Comments (25) RSS

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Pick1 1
1.4 million eh? As we know via One Million Moms, the evangelicals can be pretty bad at math...

So after calculating in reality, I'm getting the number 14, which sounds about right.
Posted by Pick1 on October 26, 2012 at 4:02 PM · Report this
Urgutha Forka 2
Yeah, the bible just goes on and on about how exclusive and intolerant Jesus was. That guy didn't like anyone.
Posted by Urgutha Forka on October 26, 2012 at 4:04 PM · Report this
zombie eyes 3
Yeah, Jesus the laissez-faire capitalist. What was that quote of his from the Sermon on Wall Street, "a little greed is good, baby."
Posted by zombie eyes on October 26, 2012 at 4:10 PM · Report this
GUYS!!!??? what happens if Jesus wins?? Who gets to serve as POTUS in his absence? Or does that just make it an even bigger win for Obama?
Posted by Duvall-ite on October 26, 2012 at 4:15 PM · Report this
Ooh! Time to listen to Wilco sing 'Christ for President'. Thanks!
Posted by tdonut on October 26, 2012 at 4:32 PM · Report this
Hernandez 6
One can only hope that these 1.4 million people live in key battleground states.
Posted by Hernandez on October 26, 2012 at 4:35 PM · Report this
Reverse Polarity 7
I fully support this recommendation.

But I think @1 is probably right. This will probably result in about two dozen write in votes at most. In Alabama, where it won't make the slightest difference.
Posted by Reverse Polarity on October 26, 2012 at 4:56 PM · Report this
Sir Vic 8
@4 Then the ultimate nightmare - a Mexican dude in the White House.
Posted by Sir Vic on October 26, 2012 at 5:00 PM · Report this
David Thompson 9
@5 that's a Woody Guthrie song, enabled by Wilco.
Posted by David Thompson on October 26, 2012 at 5:02 PM · Report this
venomlash 10
@8: An Arab in the White House is what it would be.
Posted by venomlash on October 26, 2012 at 5:16 PM · Report this
reverend dr dj riz 11
oooh ooh can i be in the cabinet ?.. not seceretary of state or nuthin.. but .. but like department of the interior or something. you know choosing the drapes and matching plates and figuring out who gets to ipod the background music and when ?
Posted by reverend dr dj riz on October 26, 2012 at 5:22 PM · Report this
Posted by George P Marsh on October 26, 2012 at 5:46 PM · Report this
kim in portland 13
I hope they do write in Jesus. It is better than their new hypocrisy created by Biilly Graham. For years they go on and on, written books that line the shelves of their book stores, about Mormonism being a cult: Bible + Book of Mormon = Satanic. And, now some of those same god-bothering "Christians" are claiming differently: Bible + Book of Mormon + tax breaks = Godly. Yeah right! Avarice rules them.
Posted by kim in portland on October 26, 2012 at 5:52 PM · Report this
I'm not sure that Keller understands how this whole 'voting' thing works.
Posted by ultrasuedecushion on October 26, 2012 at 6:06 PM · Report this
ArtBasketSara 15
Jesus eh? Sounds like a young up-and-comer! But what are his economic policies? *checks* "Give to Caesar" what is Caesar's"? Taxes!? Blasphemy! I got mine, you keep your damn Jesus-socialist-Christ hands off it!!!
Posted by ArtBasketSara on October 26, 2012 at 6:35 PM · Report this
treefort 16
jesus was NOT born in the united states! WHERE'S HIS BIRTH CERTIFICATE??
Posted by treefort on October 26, 2012 at 11:18 PM · Report this
"Bradford Lyttle (U.S. Pacifist) 110The Hill reports on its website that among the “tens of thousands of votes cast for write-in candidates, ultra-fringe parties, and fictitious (or erroneous) contenders” were 43 write-in votes for Vermin Supreme, 19 for Bill Clinton, 11 for Mickey Mouse, nine for Santa Claus, seven for Donald Duck, and five each for “Jesus” and “Joe Plumber”."
Posted by tiktok on October 27, 2012 at 12:05 AM · Report this
venomlash 18
Vermin Supreme is pretty badass.
Also, my middle school mock election quickly devolved into a pitched electoral battle between Jesus and Moses.
Posted by venomlash on October 27, 2012 at 1:26 AM · Report this
treacle 19
SHIT! I totally forgot to write in Vermon Supreme. Dammit. Another wasted vote...
Posted by treacle on October 27, 2012 at 10:22 AM · Report this
Keller says Obama's policies are socialist like it's a bad thing...and then he tells people to vote for Jesus?

Apparently he's never read the New Testament...
Posted by Calvin&Hobbes on October 27, 2012 at 5:56 PM · Report this
@18, Moishe should have won on his years of experience dealing with kvetching Jews in the wilderness, plus he was a war hero.
Posted by sarah70 on October 27, 2012 at 10:34 PM · Report this
venomlash 22
@21: Meh, I feel like too many people would have been down on him for being a political insider, having been raised in the Egyptian royal family.
Posted by venomlash on October 28, 2012 at 12:25 AM · Report this
The best part about this, is that if there really are a bunch of write-ins for Jesus and Romney loses, then Republicans will be obligated to hate Jesus with all the venom that Democrats have for the Green Party.
Posted by redemma on October 29, 2012 at 12:29 PM · Report this
Found this from David Jeremiah to be a balanced commentary for Christian voters.
Posted by NC Badger on November 1, 2012 at 9:15 AM · Report this
I'm so happy to know without doubt that what has been said about Mitt Romney could not be further from the truth. I am a" Mormon" (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints). We do not believe any of the things that were said. I am a witness of the reality of Our Savior, Jesus Christ. I know that He lives and that his atonement will cover my sins and I am striving on a daily basis to become a better and more Christlike woman. I do not worship any man on this earth and no, Mitt Romney is NOT be labled the "chosen one" by any member of my faith. Our Savior Jesus Christ is the ONLY CHOSEN ONE. We do not worship Joseph Smith or any being other than Our Savior Jesus Christ. We believe the Bible to be the word of God and believe that the Book of Mormon is another witness of the literal reality of Our Savior Jesus Christ.
There are many misconceptions about my faith and I hope you will search to find what is true. Among those truths. We believe in marriage between a man and only ONE woman. We are NOT a cult. We believe in loving and serving our fellow men whether they agree with us or not. I invite you to go to the website to find what is true about what we believe. I am certain you will be pleasantly surprised.
Posted by kmoon on November 5, 2012 at 1:16 PM · Report this

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