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Friday, November 2, 2012

Hey LAAADIES... Finally, a Car for YOU!

Posted by on Fri, Nov 2, 2012 at 10:56 AM

Ladies, a note from us he-men: We're kind of tired of driving you around in our very manly 4X4 Dodge Rams (because we like to RAM things, ya know?), and have decided you need a car of your very own. THAT'S RIGHT, we've reversed our previous decision on "women drivers" and think you are ready to get behind the pink wheel of your very own pink car. So we called the Japanese, told them to design a car for women, and voila!



Isn't it... oh, what's that word you females use? "ADORABLE"? And we know you're gonna love it for the following reasons (from LifeInc.):
1) It's pink. Just like your vaginas.
2) Its windshield is "designed to block skin-wrinkling ultraviolet rays," and a "Plasmaculture" climate control system was installed to improve "skin quality." Because no one will like you when you're old.
3) It has a pink key!

4) And a lot of other pink things, like pink stitching on the driver's wheel to remind you that you're a woman and you'd better not burn my steak. I like the inside pink.
5) Don't like pink? Well, they're designing a color for you Penthouse lesbians, too: "Eyeliner Brown." Now go make yourself look pretty for me.
6) And finally instead of an apostrophe, they substituted a heart in the car's name, "She's." (NOT FAIR. I'm going to start inserting "sweaty testicles" instead of all my apostrophes, because I AM MAN! Now go put on your pantyhose and drive that new lady car over to the Plaid Pantry. I need some smokes.)


Comments (25) RSS

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this guy I know in Spokane 1
Dodge made a car called the "LaFemme"? OMG srsly?

OMG srsly:

Posted by this guy I know in Spokane on November 2, 2012 at 11:02 AM · Report this
ScienceNerd 3
@1, but that was in the 50s... 30 years after women in America got the right to vote. I don't think that's as bad as this version in 2012... although it is in Japan. They are still pretty far behind in gender equality (and race equality).
Posted by ScienceNerd on November 2, 2012 at 11:04 AM · Report this
sheiler 4
...and Chanel #5 fumes come out of the tailpipe because as we all know *girl* cars don't fart.
Posted by sheiler on November 2, 2012 at 11:08 AM · Report this
lizlemon 5
Weird, I just bought a Honda Fit...but in black. What does that say about my femininity??
Posted by lizlemon on November 2, 2012 at 11:12 AM · Report this
yelahneb 6
Sometimes it's hard to believe that it's 2012 and bullshit like this is still happening. Granted, this is a pretty tame side of the War on Women, but still. Fuck Honda.
Posted by yelahneb on November 2, 2012 at 11:14 AM · Report this
Theodore Gorath 7
I thought Japan was hard at work at sex robots, not some frivolous luxury that no one needs, like a damn car.

Posted by Theodore Gorath on November 2, 2012 at 11:21 AM · Report this
Eh, it's Japan. I'm pretty sure I've seen similar ads for other tiny pink/girly cars only available in Japan in housewife magazines. ピンク車 - Google that if you aren't convinced.
Posted by erly on November 2, 2012 at 11:24 AM · Report this
brandon 9
It looks like a busted hymen. There I said it.
Posted by brandon on November 2, 2012 at 11:31 AM · Report this
Urgutha Forka 10
Don't forget the Dodge Neon.
Posted by Urgutha Forka on November 2, 2012 at 11:33 AM · Report this
Pope Peabrain 11
It comes with a tampon dispenser. And in case you're menopausal, a pink punching bag with your husband's face.
Posted by Pope Peabrain on November 2, 2012 at 11:36 AM · Report this
MacCrocodile 12
Wow, it would take a very secure man to drive his wife around in that car.
Posted by MacCrocodile on November 2, 2012 at 11:37 AM · Report this
Posted by sgt_doom on November 2, 2012 at 11:44 AM · Report this
Catalina Vel-DuRay 14
I think it's a dumb car (and I appreciate the shout-out to the La Femme!) But I don't think this even remotely qualifies as one of the battlefronts on "The War On Women"

Feminism, as I have always understood it (and I got most of my understanding from reading Nora Ephron) is about choices for women. If a woman wants to be all girly and drive a silly girly car, that's her right. Just don't force her to be all girly, or drive a silly girly car.
Posted by Catalina Vel-DuRay on November 2, 2012 at 11:51 AM · Report this
Aurora Erratic 15
"Eyeliner Brown." It couldn't be Walnut Brown, or Good Dog Brown, or Espresso Brown, because what do ladies know of such things? But make up, now that we know.
Posted by Aurora Erratic on November 2, 2012 at 12:06 PM · Report this
This is definitely a front in contemporary feminism. It's "otherism", basically the idea that there are things for everyone (normal cars, in a variety of colors) and things for women (pink, girly cars). The problem is that this kind of excludes women from "everyone". The intention is probably good, but the reality is that male executives are trying to cater specifically to 'concerns', like beauty-obsession and physical weakness, that they think are women specific. Thus, there are cars for normal people and cars for women (who, according to the people behind these products, don't want anything unless it is pink and makes them pretty). It's the same problem that those smaller, cheaper, pink toolsets "for women" or pink PENS "for women" have.

But Ellen can explain better than I:…
Posted by algorhythm99 on November 2, 2012 at 12:06 PM · Report this
The Dopest 17
It's mildly offensive that Honda missed the mark so badly in thinking this is what women want, but marketing products to women is hardly masochistic. I could be just as offended by minivan commercials featuring moms shuttling their chitlins to soccer practice.
Posted by The Dopest on November 2, 2012 at 12:13 PM · Report this
ScrawnyKayaker 18
@12 If they put a turbo and all-wheel-drive in it, I'd drive my spousal critter AND daughter around in it.

But that's more Subaru/Mitsubishi's style.
Posted by ScrawnyKayaker on November 2, 2012 at 12:20 PM · Report this
originalcinner 19
It looks like a very small penis to me.

Posted by originalcinner on November 2, 2012 at 12:20 PM · Report this
Color does not make a car's gender. My black Mazda3 Sport is totally a lady.
Posted by kersy on November 2, 2012 at 12:37 PM · Report this
venomlash 21
But what will the mechanophiles think of this fine lady?
Posted by venomlash on November 2, 2012 at 12:43 PM · Report this
Fnarf 23
@12, if they made it about half the size, with a motor a third the size, I'd drive it.
Posted by Fnarf on November 2, 2012 at 3:50 PM · Report this
very bad homo 24
It would be offensive if it wasn't so dang cute.
Posted by very bad homo on November 2, 2012 at 4:19 PM · Report this
Christ almighty, someone please tell Wm. S. H. that the first ladycar* in America was... The Ford Mustang.

And then give him another goddamned wedgie, plz.

* in the sense of "sold in wildly disproportionate numbers to single women"
Posted by robotslave on November 2, 2012 at 10:27 PM · Report this
watchout5 26
I own a Honda and shit like this makes me want a different car company. Thanks.
Posted by watchout5 on November 3, 2012 at 2:49 AM · Report this
skjaere 27
Oh, look. The Fit has a shiny new colour. I still want an orange one. I guess my vagina must not be working right.
Posted by skjaere on November 3, 2012 at 3:32 AM · Report this

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