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Saturday, December 1, 2012

Saturday Morning News: Unicorn Lairs, Face Tattoos, Old Twinkies

Posted by on Sat, Dec 1, 2012 at 8:56 AM

Heirloom Twinkies: A man in Federal Way has 30-year-old Twinkies that he received for his birthday in 1982. In 2004, he "seriously thought about eating them," before realizing there wasn't a gun to his head.

Time to Cell-abrate: Cambridge scientists figured out how to make stem cells from a patient's blood.

Biden Looking at Things: Ever wondered what a Joe Biden Costco shopping trip looks like?

Bleak Friday: Community college killings in Wyoming claim three people including the suspect and a faculty member.

North Korea's state news agency reports that archeologists have discovered a unicorn's lair because things there weren't sufficiently ass-backward before.

Nicotine Doesn't See Color: Australian cigarettes packs will soon reflect the lifelessness of the dead bodies they stack up. A new law mandates no brand colors or logos allowed.

Tattoo Faced: The gullible man in Northern Indiana with the Romney-Ryan logo tattooed on his face is having the regrettable ink removed in part because, to him, "it not only represents a losing campaign, but a sore losing campaign."

Bikini Barista Robberies: Police say that the three Everett espresso stand robberies in the last two weeks were likely perpetrated by the same female suspect. KOMO can't believe there's a suspected female robber.

Selling Solar: The solar panel industry resorts to Tupperware tactics.

Saturday morning anxiety? That's because today is Woody Allen's 77th birthday:

 

Comments (24) RSS

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Pope Peabrain 1
Unicorn's lair!?! Let me know when they discover Bigfoot's shoe store.
Posted by Pope Peabrain on December 1, 2012 at 9:06 AM · Report this
NotSean 2
The Koreans found a place labeled as Unicorn Lair. They think the label is old.

Roughly the same story as when a team found Jesus's kin's tomb.
Posted by NotSean on December 1, 2012 at 9:09 AM · Report this
3
Community college killings in Wyoming....

homosexual affair gone wrong.
Posted by Hair Color on December 1, 2012 at 9:10 AM · Report this
4
What?!

Nothing about the PAC12 Football Championshit game last night?

A snoozefest that only 30,000 turned out for
(even tho Stanford was playing at home!?)?

The Best of the West! and all.

Who would not jump at the chance to see #15 play #8?

You know, when the SEC plays their championship game today #2 will play #3.

Posted by it must really suck to be you on December 1, 2012 at 9:19 AM · Report this
Dr_Awesome 5
Great quote there from the owner of the bikini coffee stand: ""I guess anybody with a knife can be pretty scary, you know, especially if they threaten you with a gun."

As Dave Barry used to say, "Armed knife-wielding women!" would be a great name for a punk band.
Posted by Dr_Awesome on December 1, 2012 at 9:33 AM · Report this
Fifty-Two-Eighty 6
That Wyoming killing spree is notable only because of its lack of details. No name, no race, no motive, not even an identification of the weapon used. (The rumor going around in law enforcement circles is that it was a crossbow, by the way.) Mighty peculiar.
Posted by Fifty-Two-Eighty http://www.nra.org on December 1, 2012 at 9:39 AM · Report this
seatackled 7
Standing 5'2" to 5'4" tall with blond hair, the woman is hardly the stereotypical idea of a robber.

Gee, so what is KOMO's stereotype of a robber?
Posted by seatackled on December 1, 2012 at 9:42 AM · Report this
8
Ah, yes. Annie Hall. One of my all time favorite comedies. I always liked the cocaine scene as well, which, I heard, happened accidentally. Woody Allen gets roundly criticized - for marrying his step daughter, for being such a neurotic little weirdo - but no one can combine sharp comedy with philosophic rumination and human drama like he can. Maybe Pedro Almodovar, but Woody has his own inimitable style.
Posted by floater on December 1, 2012 at 9:45 AM · Report this
Gern Blanston 9
Oh, and a Kansas City Chiefs player killed his girlfriend, and then drove to the team's practice facility and killed himself in front of his coaches as police closed in.

http://deadspin.com/5964841/reports-kans…]
Posted by Gern Blanston on December 1, 2012 at 10:13 AM · Report this
10
Is a bikini coffee stand what I think it is? I mean, there's only one thing that could be, right?
Posted by jzimbert on December 1, 2012 at 10:35 AM · Report this
Last of the Time Lords 11
Please, it's KOMO. I mean they found America's whitest black guy to report the weather for crying out loud. I mean Steve Pool makes ME look black...and I have an English accent!!!
Posted by Last of the Time Lords on December 1, 2012 at 10:44 AM · Report this
Dr_Awesome 12
P.s. SWASHBUCKLING HERO, Y'ALL!

NEENER, NEENER!
Posted by Dr_Awesome on December 1, 2012 at 10:58 AM · Report this
13
Once again you've missed the really important news stories of the day:

ttp://www.zerohedge.com/contributed/2012-11-30/kung-fu-expert-china-beats-mob-50-trying-evict-him

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=pla…

(And one of Seattle's very own....)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=pla…
Posted by sgt_doom on December 1, 2012 at 11:06 AM · Report this
mikethehammer 14
@9,

Horrible, horrible story. Interestingly, Bill Simmons' column this week was yet another one of his unique looks at professional football and all of it's inherent hypocrisy, mixed message and (wonderfully entertaining) bullshit. Prescient.

The guy was young too, 24, I believe. Wonder if he went Dave Duerson style in an effort to preserve his brain for analysis.
Posted by mikethehammer on December 1, 2012 at 11:13 AM · Report this
Posted by sgt_doom on December 1, 2012 at 11:15 AM · Report this
Gern Blanston 16
@14 Sounds like the guy had anger management issues as far back as college. Put his hand through a window after a fight with a girlfriend. It might just have been his disposition that led to this, regardless of the football.
Posted by Gern Blanston on December 1, 2012 at 11:53 AM · Report this
Gern Blanston 17
Oh, and he shot himself in the head, so he wasn't thinking of medical science, apparently.
Posted by Gern Blanston on December 1, 2012 at 12:01 PM · Report this
Fifty-Two-Eighty 18
Ah, yes. A 25-year-old black guy making more money than most of us will make in our entire lives. Obviously, this is a clear case of pent-up rage about being discriminated against. We should get Jen Graves in here to explain how to experience the appropriate degree of white guilt.
Posted by Fifty-Two-Eighty http://www.nra.org on December 1, 2012 at 12:17 PM · Report this
Some Old Nobodaddy Logged In 19
"I'm into leather."
Posted by Some Old Nobodaddy Logged In on December 1, 2012 at 2:08 PM · Report this
Pope Peabrain 20
@14 Sometimes I wonder if these kinds of horrendous acts are nature vs. nurture. I'd be interested to know what his father was like.
Posted by Pope Peabrain on December 1, 2012 at 2:24 PM · Report this
mikethehammer 21
20,

One of the best books I've ever read, Fox Butterfield's 'All God's Children, explores that issue in pretty gut-wrenching fashion. Highly recommended if you're not familiar with it. From the dopey Amazon.com review...

"Willie Bosket is a brilliant, violent man who began his criminal career at age five; his slaying of two subway riders at fifteen led to the passage of the first law in the nation allowing teenagers to be tried as adults. Butterfield traces the Bosket family back to their days as South Carolina slaves and documents how Willie is the culmination of generations of neglect, cruelty, discrimination and brutality directed at black Americans. From the terrifying scourge of the Ku Klux Klan during Reconstruction to the brutal streets of 1970s New York, this is an unforgettable examination of the painful roots of violence and racism in America."
Posted by mikethehammer on December 1, 2012 at 2:55 PM · Report this
Catherwood 22
@25, perhaps we should, but one thing is for certain, and that is that you should fuck off.
Posted by Catherwood on December 1, 2012 at 7:07 PM · Report this
scary tyler moore 23
i think you mean @18, catherwood, and yes, he should. permanently.
Posted by scary tyler moore http://pushymcshove.blogspot.com/ on December 2, 2012 at 12:31 AM · Report this
24
The Romney/Ryan tattoo guy might need a good portion of his earned $15,000 to afford the multiple treatments needed for its removal. Even when it is gone there will be a residual skin color abnormality. I appreciate his bravery to go public with his unwise life choices.
Posted by Juan Alfredo on December 2, 2012 at 8:34 PM · Report this

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