The Comment of the Day Is by Josh Bis


Gorillas are like sad old people in a box who eat their own vomit repeatedly out of boredom. I can't even look at them.
translation : "I am less likely to anthropomorphize a dead, stuffed bear carcass than a living, breathing komodo dragon."
Alternate translation: "I find corpse mutilation less distasteful than torture of a living being."
I haven't taken my children to the zoo for 20 years--and it was totally a sad primate that broke it for me. I don't mind financially supporting the efforts of zoos, I guess, but I don't want to go.

And all taxidermy should involve tiny costumes and accessories.
Assuming a natural, or otherwise unavoidable demise, I would much rather end up a taxidermist's relic than be displayed in a zoo for any length of time.

I even think I'd prefer it to most bodily remain handling techniques if I wasn't pretty sure I'd end up damaged in a yard sale within a decade.
Yes, exactly. Providing a komodo dragon with plentiful food and a warm rock to sleep on is exactly like applying jumper cables to a human being's nipples.
That is the comment not of the day but of the five days ago.
And this is why we adore Mr. Bis. His commentary is always entertaining.
I guess inserting some qualifications ("on average" ... "some" ... "most") could have been useful for accuracy, but it seems like you basically got the point.
@6 hmm, do you have experimental data to show this?
I love well-funded, well-staffed open habitat zoos. I can't speak to yours, but we've got a really happy one here in Columbia, SC. Even the African elephants, just about the most difficult species among our animal friends to keep happy in a cultivated garden, seem reasonably content.
Totally depends on the zoo. If they take good care of the animals and give them plenty of space and privacy, then I've got no problem with them.

What I dislike are people who piss on zoos but have pets. It's like saying, "animals shouldn't be available for all to enjoy, animals should only be available for ME to enjoy."
Woodland Park Zoo is an amazing establishment with good, humane exhibits and a focus on education and conservation rather than theatrics. The only problems come from animals that are inherently problematic to keep in captivity -- elephants come to mind.

There are plenty of awful zoos out there that don't take care of their animals -- Seattle is lucky enough to have one that shines across the board.
@13 don't be ridiculous. having a dog or a cat living in your home is vastly different than keeping an elephant or tiger or gorilla in a cage.

Zoos depress the livin hell outta me. I hate seeing animals in cages, even the outdoor cages, with the exception of the vast habitat type "animal parks". However, I am totally in favor of zoos other major missions: species preservation and education. I like the idea of zoos, I just cant go to them.
Pseudo intellectual douchery...boring.
And yet it's sooooo hard to find taxidermy in Seattle.
Yeah, and like I said, it depends on the zoo. If they lock animals up in small cages that's bad. If they give them large, rich environments, that's good.

But people who say ALL zoos are cages, even the zoos that are great at animal rescue and preservation and treat their animals well, those people had better not have pets of their own because if they do, they're hypocrites. An animal held against its will is the same, whether it's in a zoo or in a home. People who think their pets love them and are free should try leaving the door open and let their pet decide for itself what it wants. I guarantee those people would never, NEVER, actually allow their pet to choose.