Your Calling, You Say?

Comments

1
If you're going to be posting every fucked up thing you find on Twitter, this blog is going to drown in it.
2
Sorry about that.
3
Is this a way so saying that you can sin as much as you want if you are with Christ? Cool!
4
@3: that's been the appeal from the start. murder? adultery? golden calf worshipping? jesus saves. after an appropriate time in purgatory.
5
Haley is so perky. Perky in a brainwashed kind of way.
6
I'm still trying to figure out what "identity in Christ" is supposed to mean. If it was supposed to mean "Christianity," then I suppose that's a (milquetoast) descriptive of a person. Otherwise, it sounds like individuality through conformity or something.

I was raised Southern Baptist, and I frequently see a lot of my religious friends and family post these bizarre religious platitudes on Facebook, tinging the most mundane things with Christian rhetoric, i.e., "I am so blessed by Christ that my husband makes great chocolate chip cookies. Look at this Bible verse." It's becoming worse and worse, too. My sister, who is trained to be a missionary, is perhaps the least bad religious person about this. I mean, she'll say something religious, but it's always in some sort of reasonable context. The others? It's like they have to shake their tiny fists at the oncoming secular doom.
7
"Fuck me in the ass 'cause I love Jesus!"- Garfunkel and Oates. It is indeed a calling, Dan. A soul-wrenching, all-consuming calling. For purity. And anal sex. And enormous lapses in logic.
8
saddlebacking is the best way to avoid carrying all those tiny dead babies in your uterus, so I can imagine it turning into a calling for some slutty christians: imagine the thousands of tiny unborn babies you'll be saving from a lifetime of suffering in your womb!
9
@8, Jesus Christ, man, and you think it's better to carry thousands of microscopic dead babies in your ASS? Fucking hell. They can get into your BRAIN from there! It's like you haven't even heard of the exciting new advances in Republican Gynecology.
10
#7....you beat me to it.
11
@ 9 - You're right, I haven't kept up with the most recent developments in Republican Gynecology. And am I ever so glad I didn't.

But since I always use condoms for anal, those microscopic unfertilized dead babies didn't get to my brain, and it's still functioning, which probably explains why I haven't bothered keeping up.

And just now I realize why all Republicans are so challenged in every way: all those closet cases and purity-minded girls never learned about safe sex, and it did get to their brains...
12
She's not just perky, she's unintentionally hilarious.

"How to Tweet Effectively on Twitter," indeed.
13
@11 "I always use condoms for anal"

...and that's where you're wrong.

See, God hates condoms, because they make it harder for you to feel the Holy Spirit inside of you, or something; praise Jesus!

The existence of butt babies, is what makes saddlebacking acceptable, as it is sex that is open to procreation, as God intended, read Genesis if you don't follow.

In short, Jesus loves you, but you're going to hell. God bless.