Philippines Ferry Sinks: At least 31 dead, 170 are missing.

"Old-Fashioned Bible Preacher" Hilariously Fucks Up Book Cover: Evangelist Doug Sehorne published his e-book with a picture from ABC's Modern Family on the cover. A Facebook post (which is no longer up) says he found it from Google Images, and assumed it wasn't copyrighted.

Bertha Watch! She's dug out 24 feet of the viaduct replacement tunnel in 18 days, and recently reached soil after getting past a 15-foot-thick wall of concrete. Bertha is expected to dig the replacement tunnel at an average pace of six feet per day.

I'll Stick to Pockets, Thanks: Today marks the first Seahawks 2013 home preseason game against the Broncos. Whoa there! Where do you think you're going with that backpack and purse? Don't you remember that NFL's new bag policy—only see-through bags that don't exceed 12" x 6" x 12" are allowed in the stadium—goes into effect today? Oh wait, is that a small clutch bag about the size of a hand you're carrying? Yeah, that's still allowed in.

Bad Election News! King County Prosecutor's Office has filed seven felony counts of theft against Kent City Council candidate Kenneth Sharp, following investigations of him allegedly stealing almost $300,000 from his elderly mother. According to Sharp's defense attorney, he has no plans to drop out of the Kent City Council race.

Kent! Get Your Shit Together! Police say Kent couple Anthony and Stephanie Mitchell have neglected and starved their two-month-old baby, who happens to have a muscular disorder. The Mitchells aren't allowed to see their kids, and are being held in King County Jail.

Don't Drink and Play with Guns: A Western Washington University student died yesterday after playing with a gun and accidentally shooting himself, according to Bellingham police. The Bellingham Herald reported that the student had been drinking with others.

Princess Gets Cocky: A major cockfighting ring around the Pacific Northwest was busted on Thursday, with 18 people arrested. A former Oregon sheriff's deputy was among the arrested, as well as his wife, who just happens to be a Romanian princess.

Tense Morning in Cairo: Unconfirmed reports say Cairo's Fateh Mosque, where hundreds of anti-coup protesters were holed up today, has been cleared of protesters. Security forces opened fire at the mosque earlier.

More Egypt News: Interim Prime Minister Hazem el-Beblawi proposed legally dissolving the Muslim Brotherhood.

This cat needs to catch up on Game of Thrones.