This police report is authored by Officer Clark Dickson:

On 06/01/14 at approximately 0042 hours, I was dispatched to a call. I was driving my marked patrol car eastbound on Beacon Avenue S... As I was driving near the cross street of 11 AV S, I struck a cat with my patrol car. The incident was unavoidable. The cat appeared to be fatally injured. I reported the incident to Sgt. Rusness and Lt. Swank.

Dickson then declares that, under penalty of perjury under the laws of the state of Washington, his report is "true and correct to the best of my knowledge and belief."