I read Can't Let It Transpire's letter to you about her problems with clitoral stimulation, and would really really love to be able to give her my thoughts, as a woman who has experienced what she's experiencing, if you'd be willing to pass them on.

I'm 11 years older than CLIT, and direct clitoral stimulation has always been painful to me. At her age I found it too difficult to tell partners that what was going on wasn't getting my rocks off. (And Dr. Herbenick is totally right: boys at that age tend to just rummage roughly and hope something will work!) Over the course of my twenties I slowly discovered that treating the clitoral hood like a foreskin (moving it up and down without actually touching the clit directly) works much better for me. It wasn't until my late twenties that I discovered all the nerve endings that run down along both sides of the vulva (the fat penguin-like diagram of a clitoris explains these well) and stimulating them can work too. Maybe the same things will work for CLIT.

I didn't have my first orgasm with a partner until I was 25, and my first one with a male partner wasn't until I was 27! I'd hate for CLIT to have to wait that long too just because of lack of information. I highly recommend the Jimmyjane Form 2 vibrator for the kind of stimulation that works for those of us who can't take it directly on the clit. It's expensive, but nothing does it better! And I recommend she just cheerily explains this little oddity of her body to her boyfriend (and any potential future partners)—my sex life is a thousand times better for it.

I feel your pain (literally), CLIT, but I hope this helps!

Came Later In Time 2

Thanks for sharing, CLIT2. Bonus letter about another recent SLLOTD... after the jump...

Thank you for taking the time to respond on your blog to my letter about my marriage. The feedback from you and the comments made by others helped clarify a lot for me. It's sometimes hard to analyze a situation when you are actually living it. The responses helped me really see my marriage and they brought me back up to the surface of life. So thank you.

BTW: Yes, my letter is sadly real. Not a conspiracy by rightwingers to see if you condone awful behavior as one commenter thought. LOL.

WTBO