Before you talk to your kids about sex, you must talk to them about art. Matters relating to sex are easy, because everyone can more or less fuck. Sex, in this respect, is a lot like language. Sex is one of the most animal things a human can do (biological), and language is one of the most human things a human can do (cultural). Language is also for everybody. Art is another matter altogether. It is not as universal as sex or as democratic as language. Which brings me to the first thing you must tell your child about art: Art is not democratic. Meaning: There is no fairness in art.

To get this message across to your boy or girl, I recommend showing them Martin Scorsese's documentary on Fran Lebowitz, Public Speaking. And what does she say about democracy in the middle of this excellent film? That there is too much of it in art, and not enough of it in politics. Give your boy or girl time to appreciate this insight. It's a deep one. Really, why is there so much democracy in the arts? Because the system would prefer that everyone explore their artistic potential rather than their political potential…

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