Okay, let's be real, Bernie Sanders supporters. We all know your candidate would make the best president. He is awesome. Says everything that a good-guy president should, and actually believes it. Yeah, sure, he's not super-interested in foreign policy, but imagine how much better the world would be if the Bush administration were half as engaged in world affairs.

We all want Bernie to win.

But. What are you going to do about how he's lagging 33 points behind the Clinton machine?

Bernie has a few opportunities coming up to grab more attention and claim some of those Hillary supporters. Things could change. It's possible. I'm not saying you shouldn't be optimistic. The landscape might shift a bit after the debate this Saturday. (I won't be watching — as part of my efforts to blot out the unpleasant trauma of this election whenever possible, I'll be hosting a screening of a certain disastrous 1978 holiday special about stars and wars that night at Verne & Wells.)

And let's be clear: I want to see Bernie suddenly surge. So do lots of people! He just became the first candidate in the race to bring in two million small contributions, and that's really nice and all, but those donations average less than $30 and that is really not a lot of money. At that rate, he's pulled in about sixty million; Clinton had seventy million back in September and surely has lots more now.

Bernie may have more fiscal supporters, but Hillary has more cash. Of course, in a perfect world, the number of supporters would matter more than money. That's how democracy is supposed to work, after all. And democracy DOES work. Isn't it pretty to think so?

In an ad celebrating his two-million milestone, Bernie says, "Over two million contributions have been made to the only campaign that rejects the corrupt campaign finance system. You can’t level the playing field by taking money from Wall Street banks and billionaires."

That's probably a little dig at Hillary. I hope it doesn't hurt her feelings too much. She might have to pull out a ten-million-dollar bill to blot her tears.

Sanders people, you're realistic about this, right? Is that why 59 percent of Sanders supporters say that they'd be OK with Hillary getting the nomination instead?

Or are you expecting some sort of Christmas miracle where Bernie wakes up, throws open the shutters, and shouts, "you there, boy, what's to-day?" And an urchin yells up "why, Election Day, and you are the clear frontrunner," and then Bernie throws the kid a shilling and tells him to buy a goose, and the kid's like, "thanks, but I'm just going to spend this on Amiibos," and Bernie doesn't care because he is the president now, which means we all get as many Amiibos as we want. (Obviously my fantasy priorities for a Sanders administration may be different from yours.)

For real, what is your vision for how Bernie's going to win this? Millions of people mobilizing to support him? Hahaha, but seriously folks.