| 1. Spokesmodel for the Religious Right/trophy wife of Religious Right figurehead | 20% |
| 2. Porn star | 9% |
| 3. Waitress in a waffle house, where she'll grow morbidly obese while reminding everyone forever "I was almost Miss USA!" | 7% |
| 4. All three, in rapid succession | 65% |
Total votes: 1078.