When’s the last time you sat in a dark, crowded theater to watch triple-X straight, queer, hardcore, softcore, and/or humorous short films celebrating S-E-X? Too long! The Stranger’s seventh annual locally produced HUMP! Porn Film Festival is hands down the best (and maybe the only) chance you’ll have all year to do this. Having attended every single HUMP!, I can say the films just keep getting better and better. Dan Savage says of this year: “Best films ever.” And THAT’S one dirty mind you can trust. (On the Boards; 100 W Roy St; thestranger.com/hump; 4, 6, 8, 10 pm, and midnight; $23; 21+)