Well, boy crack anyway. Legalizing gay marriage will hurt straight women, according to this douche, because modern straight men—like ancient straight men—aren't going to be interested in women once they've gotten with a few "smooth-skinned boys."

Men, we learn from ancient Rome, will enjoy sex with other men, if there is no social censure.... And so now we come back to the idyllic day of free choice and tolerance envisioned by the gay and lesbian movement. It turns out that that day has winners and losers. The winners—big time—are homosexual men, because the historical record shows that they can expect their potential pool of partners to expand exponentially. Of note here is that this expanded pool of partners accrues to gay men, but not to homosexual women. At the risk of getting too explicit, I leave it the reader's basic grasp of anatomy to figure out why in ancient Rome a man who found pleasure in a woman, could also find pleasure in a man, while the record shows that a heterosexual woman rarely found sexual satisfaction in the company of another woman.

The losers from all this will be the vast majority of women. With full social sanction given to homoerotic activity, the historical precedent suggests that tomorrow's women will have a harder time finding and holding on to suitable men.

I always thought straight men were made of stronger stuff. But apparently all it takes to pull them to the pink side is a willowy twink with a waxed asshole. Good to know. (Thanks to Slog tipper Sally B.)