Comments

1
Wow.
I guess if you want to do the Gay you shouldn't go to BYU.
Or promise to obey its honor code.
2
And here I've never clubbed anyone for any purpose. I clouted somebody in fourth grade, is all.
3
Not even for sporting purposes?
4
@1 Yeah, that should have been a no-brainer. I had a former co-worker who dropped out of BYU when he came out of the closet. The way he described it, no gay person in their right mind would choose to go to school there.
5
I agree with everyone else - this isn't exactly shocking news.
6
@1 & @4 considering the families who send their kids there (very strictly LDS), there may be a lot of pressure from parents on their kids to go there. It might not have been the kid's (gay or straight) first choice.
7
But it's OK if he does it with sinning straight boys needing to be saved from their homosexual behaviors, right?
8
Obviously BYU is a private school and can do whatever they want. Don't like it? Don't go to it or support it. Deal with it, it's called the first amendment.

But as someone who dated a few BYU students as a young stud growing up in the suburbs of Utah, I can tell you this is far from their craziest rule. Go dig up their codes of conduct if you want some laughs. The best part: in my experience, they actually take them seriously.
9
Oh please, please have another kiss in.
10
Avoid Even Margarine-al homosexual Conduct?

ok, but what about the I Can't Believe It's Not Butter! rubdowns?
& to forgo even the creamy salty goodness of a Country Cock...

oh man.

11
It reminds me of when a GOP congressman sucks a dick in a men's room for non-sexual purposes.
12
Swearengen @8, way to eat your cake and still have it.

Legal ≠ Immune from Criticism or Ridicule
13
That confused the hell out of me. First, they list all of these intimate physical activities, touching, kissing, and then "clubbing"? Like, going to a club? Or is there a sexual act referred to as "clubbing"? Or is BYU somehow ant-fur?
14
Some Canadians go seal clubbing.
I would think the BYU administration would be proud of students that go gay clubbing.
15
I'm not sure this is what God really wanted. It was probably really hard for Joseph Smith to hear God speak clearly, as he was dictating with his head inside a hat. It would be more consistent with the rest of the religion if God discouraged "even marginal Intellectual conduct."
16
@ 14 - But not gay seal clubbing.

But if that means clubbing gay seals (the pink fur is how you spot 'em!), I would think BYU would be all over that!
17
@11, They do it for the nutritional benefits.
18
It's for "non-sexual purposes" if you say "No Homo" afterward.

@17: Any respectable orangutan would be insulted to be compared to a GOP congressman.
19
Thank you to everyone who, like me, saw the participle "clubbing" and thought: baby seals?
21
Kissing for non-sexual purposes. I like it. Would be a great song title.
22
@18, That may be so, but in the end it's impossible to argue with ~*Science*~. The orangutans will just have to deal; Republicans just get hungry sometimes.
23
a baby seal walks into a club.....
24
So frotting around the margins would be verboten. But to summarize the "Steps in Overcoming Masturbation", if I were Mormon, I could have all the erotic dreams and nocturnal emissions I wanted provided I was wearing full-coverage PJ's, had one hand tied to a bedpost, and firmly gripped a Book of Mormon in the other. And surely it wouldn't hurt before snuggling into bed (alone, natch) to take in a movie, admire some photographs, or read a little story.
25
am i insensitive to think that if you're gay/not hardline mormon/not insane you shouldn't go to BYU to begin with? I mean, what was this guy thinking? BYU isnt even all that prestigious, is it? super conservative schools, i thought, are generally regarded as a bit silly by the public so your degree wouldnt mean as much. and its expensive, so why go unless you want 4 years of not drinking, not touching anyone (including yourself) and learning about how satan hides dino bones to trick us?
26
@25

Nope, you're not insensitive for thinking that. Careful though - this is SLOG. You might get called a bigot for such views.
27
Oh venomlash, the link won't open here in China - I'll have to take it on faith that it was hilarious (damn you, Hu Jintao - you win this round!)
28
Un-fucking-believable!
29
Part of the reason for attending the BYU law school is that Mormons get charged half of the regular tuition as non-Mormons. So $10k vs. $20k a year can be a big draw.
30
It's incredible that anyone could have written or signed that letter with a straight face.
31
@1 and @4, some of us wound up at BYU programmed to get a wife and only realized we were gay until after we were attending. Whoopsies.

The Honor Code office is, quite honestly, mortifyingly fucked up. When we went to the club we would try to hitch rides with people who didn't attend BYU because representatives from the Honor Code Office would drive by the gay clubs and look for BYU parking stickers or run license plate numbers.
32
So if that university can ban gays, does that mean there are universities that can ban blacks?
33
I love how every word except 'homosexual' is capitalized.
34
32
Only if they don't realize they are black until they show up....
35
#25, that was not insensitive. THIS is insensitive:

Mormonism is the almost the stupidest religion in the world. It's second only to Scientology. To believe Mormon doctrine, you have to believe all the ususal Christian crapola, PLUS a whole load of patently ridiculous claims about American settlement, genealogy, etc. And all this coming from a notorious con-man who claimed to have been visited by an angel. Gullibility, thy name is Mormon.
36
32: "So if that university can ban gays, does that mean there are universities that can ban blacks?"

Avoid even marginal black conduct.
37
@25: Actually, while it may not be the most prestigious school in all the land, it does pretty good. Tuition is SUPER-CHEAP for a private school, about $3500 a semester for card-carrying Mormons (at least it was when I was considering attending, which was 6 years ago. Luckily, as a gay boy, I wised up and went elsewhere.) And like it or not, a lot of organizations like a BYU graduate (par exemple, the CIA, fancy businesses and law firms) because they have a reputation for being hard-working, trustworthy and vice-averse.
38
@36: So tanning beds are out?
39
does BYU teach, like, science and stuff? cuz i know some of the east-coast conservative christian schools dont like fossils and what have you
40
BYU rankings (2008)

#10 - Number of graduates who go on to earn PhDs from 1997-2006 (NORC/NSF)

#1 - Producer of dental school-bound students (AADSAS)

#6 - Producer of law school-bound students (LSAC)

Top 10 - Producer of medical school-bound students (AAMC)

#9 - Number of short-term study abroad programs (Institute of International Education)

#16 - Number of students in study abroad (Institute of International Education)
41
BYU's business school is highly regarded

From The Wall Street Journal:
#1 - Master of Business Administration program among regional schools.
#2 - Business school ethics emphasis
#4 - Accounting emphasis

From Business Week:
#7 - Undergraduate business program
#1 - Undergraduate business program, according to recruiters
#1 - Ethics emphasis

From U.S.News & World Report:
#3 - Best Undergraduate Accounting Program (Marriott School)
#19 - International business program specialty (Marriott School)
#38 - Best Undergraduate Business Program (Marriott School of Management)

42
the study abroad bits dont surprise me much, the men travel for 2 years standard anyway, right? and mormons have a rep for being awesome in businesses, which makes sense , since they are such a tight social network. but im for reals about that science stuff. My grandparents are mormon, and when their church got new missionaries, they would send them to my mom (who left the church at 8) and me ( quaker-leaning religious studies major) because they knew we'd give them a (polite) hard time about what they were teaching; you know, like for practice. the last women they sent honestly did not beleive that native americans arrived here from the bering strait, and that white people came here from isreal ( i know, they like, morphed from jewish to white). s'all im sayin.
43
42
What colour are Jews?
44
jewish colored? i dunno, i know they don't count as white, white usually denotes caucasian, which is caucus mountains/parts of europe. the jews i referred to would"ve probably looked kind of middle eastern, that long ago. i think. regardless of what color they were, mormons (hardcore ones) think they came here in like, canoes
45
jewish doesn't count as white, right? am i being racist? cuz i thought it was like a separate ethnicity/culture. much love for ya'll, bagels are great, purim is fun
46
@45: I only put "White/Caucasian" down on forms that I need to fill out; I identify as Jewish rather than white. And most Jewish people do tend to have more of a Mediterranean (if Ashkenazi) or Arabic (if Sephardic) complexion.
47
So does this mean that if, say, the football teams star player smacks anther payers ass or hugs another player he'll be expelled? Or are they exempted due to the income that the althletic department generates?
48
In fairness, I went to a Catholic university and they kicked out my roommate for hetero sex. There was a no fraternization policy and she violated it.

In a way, the ban was good - there was a housing crunch and almost every room had three or four roommates sharing, so there was no way to get a guy in our room without pissing someone off.

On the other hand, since you couldn't bring anyone back to your room, walking around campus at night you might come across people having a good time in the bushes ...
49
Jews and Arabs are Caucasian and many Jews are of European descent. It's a religion and a culture not a phenotype.
50
49
did you hear that venom?
you're White after all!!
come sit in the front of the bus....
51
@50: Up your nose with a rubber hose, Alleged. Many Latinos are mostly Caucasian, but don't identify as white. Why? They feel that they are Latino, not white. I identify as Jewish rather than white, and for a good reason.
And I'm pretty sure that a lot of people with your political ideology would rather see me sit in the front of the oven.

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