A few months ago, I tried to get excommunicated from the Catholic Church.
Apparently, by asking to be excommunicated, I excommunicated myself. I was informed by a nun named Sister Rita Mae Bissonnette that if I sent a letter to her directly stating my wishes, she could send a letter to the priest at the church where I was born telling him to put a note on my permanent Catholic record that I don't consider myself a Catholic anymore. That letter (click to enlarge) finally came last week, while I was on vacation:
I think this is the end of it, as far as the Catholic Church is concerned. This letter—a perfectly Catholic exercise in wishy-washy passive aggressiveness—is as far as they're willing to go. I "don't consider[ myself] a Roman Catholic," which means the church still considers me a Catholic, albeit one who has fallen in his faith, but at least they are at least institutionally acknowledging my protest. It's not as satisfying a conclusion to this whole experience as I would've hoped, but I'm still getting this fucking letter framed.