Blogs Feb 11, 2011 at 3:53 pm

Comments

303
Amen to you....Why should we try to be people we aren't. I think it is funny that I used to only look at skinny girls and wish to be them, but lately I find myself turning my envy on the full figured women who don't hide their bodies, but show them off in really nice outfits that scream with personality. They walk around just as confident and sexy as the size zero girls and honestly they are more so. There is nothing ugly about big women. But being ashamed of being a big women is disgusting. We can still wear the pretty clothes they are just a little bigger
304
So awesome, Lindy. I've loved you for ages and you just keep getting more lovable. Keep it up.
305
@184...dead on. And Lindy? Thanks for speaking for every woman who ever grew up in America, whether fighting her weight because she was too heavy (me) or too thin. We can never be "just right," can we?
306
Lindy West, your courage is stunning. I fucking love you for you writing this. And I fucking love the Lindy container for carrying around that amazing fucking Lindy brain.
307
I am so glad that Lindy is calling out Dan's crypto-FATcism and hate--btw, Dan, we don't need to provide links when it's your fucking MO to resort to calling out fatties when you get bored. He is a hater, he knows it, but I don't think he has the lucidity or the empathy to admit to it. It's too easy to look away from your ugliness and live as a righteous fool with your pet cause as your looking glass.

We've had a lot of weight issue focus in slog nowadays, which is good. It IS a health issue. I am of the view that we have a sedentary culture and that it takes a lot of work, and yes, discipline to maintain health. I've been back and forth. I am actually thin and well-built but that doesn't mean I don't have to watch my tendencies and behavior to keep the pounds off AND that this is all dependent on my personal makeup.

Thank you Lindy for doing this and I hope this will help Dan, too.
308
Thanks for saying this, Lindy.
309
Lindy West: I love you forever, I like you for always and as long as I'm living my favorite Stranger staff member you'll be. I will literally do anything to tell me to. Literally.

I wanted to say "FUCK YOU" to a whole bunch of people who said stupid obnoxious bullshit, but it so long to read through the DOZENS OF SUPPORT POSTS that I forgot who they were. People who post anything but love: EAT SHIT AND DIE.

LIN-DY WEST!!! LIN-DY WEST!!! LIN-DY WEST!!!
310
For those people who might want to try a simple "calories in/calories out" approach and see where it takes you, I'd recommend http://www.myfitnesspal.com/mobile, mainly because it's free and fairly straightforward to use. Rather than employing a fad diet, it just tracks your calories and tells you how many you need to eat daily to gain or lose weight. I've been using it for about 4 weeks, and have made slow but steady progress. It may not be right for everyone, but it seems like a good way to teach yourself portion control and how to moderate your eating to fit your body's needs.

If you do decide to give it a try, send me a private message with any questions, or check out their forums at their web site for all sorts of good, non-judgmental support from other users.

[Please insert all "you're going to gain it all back, you asshole" replies here]
311
I love you.
312
You rock, thank you. I've entangled myself in heated arguments with people I otherwise like very much, telling them to shut their face on fat-hate. I don't deal with fat prejucice personally, but I see the effects of a lifetime of weight-loss failure/struggles with my mom and I won't have *any* stupid-ass comments. You are so right and I applaud you for saying all these things, especially the bit about mental health.
313
This was fucking rad. I have nothing to add except that I hate Dan Savage when he talks about women and fat people, so it was like a Christmas present to read this. And calling your boss out takes more guts than most people in this shy city have, so I am now your #1 fan.
314
Andrew, you're an asshole, and a douchbag, and I hope you get skinny, and fit, and find someone to love you, for your fitness, and you can pretend that you were never fat, and you live in fear of ever gaining back a single pound.... Seriously, douch.
315
Thank you, thank you!
316
gee i love being thin.
317
I'm really fascinated by this issue. I've read every post and it seems to me that the crux of the conversation comes down to human agency. For every fat person who has commented in support of Lindy's bravery- for accepting and celebrating her fatness, a condition she deems out of her control- there are a slew of posters who claim to have lost vast amounts of weight. I'm naturally skinny so I honestly don't know.
318
Don't be surprised that Princess Dan and other supposed "A-Gays" pass judgment on weight. Those ladies are blessed with decent genes and can't ever imagine that the rest of us actually have to work on our weight.
319
Wow, all the people commenting on her eating a burger, milkshake, fries etc... My entire family eats like this probably 3-4 times a week. My older sister and my mother are both skinny. My brother and I are fat. I eat LESS than them most of the time but still gain weight. I love swimming, walking, playing ACTIVELY with my dogs, dancing etc... But ya know what? I'm still fat. I enjoy eating Green Salads with barely any dressing, but yes, I do occasionally like to have a bit of "junk food" like pretty much everyone else in the world.

People talk about how it's affecting your health to be fat, and that's the only reason they would bother to say anything. But would you go up to some guy drinking beer in a bar and tell him he should stop...for his health? What about a "perfect" little blonde woman indulging in a large size popcorn at a movie, would you tell her that what she's doing is unhealthy, or even give her that dirty look about how much she is eating? Nope. It's just fat people usually. Somehow the world thinks it's okay to approach a total stranger who is fat and tell them that they'd be so pretty if they weren't so heavy or ask "Are you sure?" when they order something for dessert.

I am fat. I have tried everything, including prescription diet pills that cost $200 a month, to lose weight. Yes, they worked for the one month I took them because the rare times I was actually able to keep food down it ended up running out of me another way within an hour after eating it. I guess I could get The Surgery, but on top of it costing thousands of dollars, it also greatly endangers your life and makes it impossible to live normally.

Should I apologize to the world for not measuring up to their standards? I do charity work, I recycle, I rescue animals in need. I keep secrets well and don't gossip about people. I don't break laws or even speed while driving. I don't drink or do drugs. I'm not on welfare. So why is it that I am seen as the worst in society just because I cannot shop at "regular" stores?
320
@318 How do you know Dan is blessed with decent genes and doesn't have to work on his weight? Also, using "ladies" as an insult is misogynistic. Pretty hypocritical of you.
321
Wow, all the people commenting on her eating a burger, milkshake, fries etc... My entire family eats like this probably 3-4 times a week. My older sister and my mother are both skinny. My brother and I are fat. I eat LESS than them most of the time but still gain weight. I love swimming, walking, playing ACTIVELY with my dogs, dancing etc... But ya know what? I'm still fat. I enjoy eating Green Salads with barely any dressing, but yes, I do occasionally like to have a bit of "junk food" like pretty much everyone else in the world.

People talk about how it's affecting your health to be fat, and that's the only reason they would bother to say anything. But would you go up to some guy drinking beer in a bar and tell him he should stop...for his health? What about a "perfect" little blonde woman indulging in a large size popcorn at a movie, would you tell her that what she's doing is unhealthy, or even give her that dirty look about how much she is eating? Nope. It's just fat people usually. Somehow the world thinks it's okay to approach a total stranger who is fat and tell them that they'd be so pretty if they weren't so heavy or ask "Are you sure?" when they order something for dessert.

I am fat. I have tried everything, including prescription diet pills that cost $200 a month, to lose weight. Yes, they worked for the one month I took them because the rare times I was actually able to keep food down it ended up running out of me another way within an hour after eating it. I guess I could get The Surgery, but on top of it costing thousands of dollars, it also greatly endangers your life and makes it impossible to live normally.

Should I apologize to the world for not measuring up to their standards? I do charity work, I recycle, I rescue animals in need. I keep secrets well and don't gossip about people. I don't break laws or even speed while driving. I don't drink or do drugs. I'm not on welfare. So why is it that I am seen as the worst in society just because I cannot shop at "regular" stores?
322
Thanks so much for this Lindy, you rawk! I wonder if you read the Jan 30 NY Times Week in Review. Frank Bruni, who's had his own battles with weight, wrote that our obsession with weight and fitness is all Jack LaLanne's fault!
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/01/30/weekin…

"What he left behind when he died last week, at the toned old age of 96, was not only a sweaty culture of relentless crunching and spinning but also the notion that fitness equals character, and that self-actualization begins with the self-discipline to get and stay in shape. In the post-LaLanne landscape, it’s not the eyes but the abdominals that are windows to the soul."
323
"Accept me and my right to exist and/or get the fuck out of my way."

Absolutely. As long as you accept that you DON'T have the right to be considered attractive, healthy, or unobtrusive.
324
You rock! Dan is a closet republican.
325
For anyone that has wanted to lose weight and had trouble with diets not working, please take a look at the Paleo diet, also known as the caveman diet. Although, this is truly a lifestyle, not a diet

Most diets fail because they fail to account for our evolutionary past. Some can still be effective, but will often entail much hunger and often people regain the weight they've lost after going off of them.

Eating as our ancestors did in paleolithic times (before the agricultural revolution brought grains, legumes, and dairy into our diet) works in sync with our bodies, rather than trying to force starvation upon them. Grains, legumes, and dairy have only been in our diets for less than 1% of human existence, and our bodies have not adequately adapted to these foods.

You wouldn't feed a tiger cereal, and you wouldn't feed a rabbit ground beef and expect them to have good health. You would feed these animals the things they eat in the wild, and likewise, you should eat the foods that your ancestors evolved eating.

I have nothing to gain from this, but I have seen in work in so many that I cannot help but share it.

The basics are:
Eat: quality meat and vegetables, nuts and seeds, some fruit, and little starch.
Do NOT Eat: Grains(esp. Wheat), added sugar, legumes(beans, peanuts, etc), refined vegetable oils, and dairy.

Please, try it for 30 days, if after that you don't like it, you haven't lost anything but avoiding certain foods for 30 days, not a big deal. It is not uncommon for people that are overweight to lose 15 or more lbs in this period, without much hunger, and with improved nutrient intake. Most people have dramatic improvements in health markers as well, such as blood lipids, c-reactive protein, fasting insulin levels, HbA1C levels, and nutrient status.

Here are some resources to help you get started:

http://robbwolf.com/book-resources/
326
I am female 5'8" and prolly weigh less than my housemate female 5'4". She's got the back yard of a black person and knockers even the balance. I've got boney ass that'll give you bruses and an A-cup. I also think she is stronger than me.

In all respects her diet is way healthier than mine in regards to portion size, junk:real-food ratio & alcohol intake (she can't stand beer and I love it). We prolly get similar amounts of exercize.
327
I am female 5'8" and prolly weigh less than my housemate female 5'4". She's got the back yard of a black person and knockers even the balance. I've got boney ass that'll give you bruises and an A-cup. I also think she is stronger than me. [the differences go on and on, totally different gene pools]

In all respects her diet is way healthier than mine in regards to portion size, junk:real-food ratio & alcohol intake (she can't stand beer and I love it). We prolly get similar amounts of exercize. Neither into sports or reg-exercise but both are non-drivers/non-cycleists.
328
You say fat, I say voluptuous.
329
#57: Fat used to be sexy and a sign of wealth. Go to museum sometime and get a load of Renoir and the sexy bulges and curves that were the subject of artists.
330
i think the two of you cooked this up to get page hits.
331
Fertility goddess are very zaftig. Google "Fertility goddess" images and you'll get an eyeful.
332
Girl... you're beautiful. I hate that being healthy is all about a number... My husband is TECHNICALLY a healthy BMI... but he eats like a stereotypical fat person; bacon double cheeseburgers, fried foods, sugary things, etc. And he used to be a couch potato (he's in the Air Force now so unwillingly he's done more physical activities).

Now I'm technically very obese by my BMI... but my diet is MUCH healthier and I'd exercise 2 hours a night. I've struggled with my weight all my life. I'm sure if we had our cholesterol and blood pressure checked I'd win that... so people shouldn't judge us just how we look.

By the way, I'm 5'6" and 260lbs currently. And this is me: http://a7.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-a… So fuck you society, I love my body too.
333
Who cares?
334
You are gorgeous. You are hilarious. You are witty. You are insightful. You are in possession of a ROCKING set of gams.

If someone else sees something wrong with your body, they are WRONG. So there. If they can treat their opinions (fat = unsightly) as fact, I can treat my opinion as fact.

And my opinion is that you are AWESOME AND HOT, so it is now a FACT that you are AWESOME AND HOT.
335
brava Lindy...there certainly are some misinformed people out there! it's interesting to me that the most negative you-didn't-try-hard-enough bullshit came mostly from what i guess to be males.... hello? women's bodies ARE DIFFERENT!!!! it's why we are equipped to have children and men are not! Duh! to say nothing of the experimental medicine practiced on women....i am 61; i am a "DES daughter;" i have had multiples cancers, surgeries and no parts left to remove...it also caused some serious heart damage for which i am forever on medications which affect my metabolism....if you don't know what DES is or what it did to millions of daughters - google it! thanks to paternalistic doctors and flawed research i have weight problems which - read my lips - i CANNOT do anything about beyond a certain level...my metabolism is in constant turmoil, hormones are and always have been totally messed up - i'm fuckin' lucky i even have one daughter let alone two (besides the five miscarriages i had in-between)....if any of you who have such a judgemental you're-just-a-loser attitude, perhaps you should extract your feet from your mouths and apologize for you ignorance if nothing else! And seriously rethink your "read-fire-aim" policy.... if being civil and polite is too "expensive" morally and emotionally you are the ones with a serious "weight" problem with your egos.
336
pretty hot and tempting. lindy rules
337
Lindy? Why did I always think Lindy was a guy? I guess I knew a guy named Lindy and then I think Lindy was doing a live slog of the WC game and I thought maybe Lindy was just gay or something. I honestly thought for a long time that Lindy was a dude who slept with lots of hot chicks and was mainly wearing a lot of black with a black hat. My bad. You seem cool either way. I'm just saying, sometimes, we the viewing public don't always know one way or the other. Without pics. I think I used to ride on Sarah Palin's short bus. So feel free to disregard this post.
338
It's great when any person can love and accept themselves the way they are, faults and all.
339
I love you Lindy West.

And the haters can suck it,
340
Brava, Lindy, most especially for standing up to Dan for what amounts to cheap pot shots. I especially appreciate the points you made about how shame doesn't actually change anyone's body shape. In my experience, too, it perpetuates weight. I've lost weight at times when I felt loved and fulfilled FIRST. Btw, I think your body looks curvaceous and all earth goddessy! Maybe when the earth is cherished and respected again, images of fertility and abundance will be revered. Until then, at least there's this handy litmus test for screening out people who are out of touch with the things that (I think) really matter: people who say ignorant, meatheaded things about weight and weight loss and those with the sense to shut their traps.
341
Seriously, some of you people sound like radical vegans, with their, "Oh, you're just not doing it *right* mentality". I especially love #291's "I happen to be very thin... It would be very hard for me to put on enough weight", yet I still know better than you who've lived with it attitude. Seriously people, everyone is different. I'm 6'3", and I average around 200 punds. If I eat like crap for a while, maybe I gain 10 pounds. If I eat super-healthy, I maybe drop down to 195. I don't exercise, I work at a desk. By your logic I should be a 350 pound diabetic.

Not even that anyone's going to read this, but it's at least one more comment to get it to the top of the stack. Lindy, yr beautiful inside and out. Nice to see you stand up for yourself so vociferously; you've given a voice to many who cannot.
342
Yea Lindy! I've frequently wondered if when anti-fat posts go up on Slog, do you just want to yell, "Uh hello, I'm right here! You do know I read this right??!" I guess now I know the answer. Thanks for saying something. xo
343
@ 29 FTW, the rest was tl; dr.
344
Sorry Dan, Lindy's hot.
345
LOVE!!! This is just perfect for me. I think many, many people missed the point. They should go back to 6th grade and work on their reading comprehension. :)

You Rock!
346
i don't even know you, and i love you, lindy. thank you for saying this in the way you said it. i am an instructor at a university and i spoke with students today about size oppression in our society, "ideal" body types and the like-- surprisingly, they completely got it. not necessarily all the implications of course, but they know something is wrong. and now i know more about it and what link to direct them to for next class. <3 with the void, full powers.
347
Holy shit, who knew Lindy was hot?
348
I'm going to respectfully disagree, KingofQueenAnne @ 318.

I think that Savage works his ass off. I don't think it is blessed genes at all. Perhaps, he is driven not to share some of the health concerns that other members of his family have, like I am? I don't know, but he comments enough about the gym and his diet to suggest that it isn't great genes. Not to mention that he has written about being over weight as a pre-teen/teen. I'm prone to think that he strictly controls what goes into his mouth and exercises as way of paying the piper; to avoid looking a way he may feel he is destined to become without strict effort. Maybe, that is where he is coming from? Anecdotal experience and discipline. I think it is common for humans to apply their experience to others, and to hold up their efforts as evidence that everyone can achieve the same. It may be possible that his love for others combined with his personal efforts at his physical appearance have blinded him to the idea that his words are hurtful to some? And they may have blocked him from realizing the depth of hurt, and to the realization that he doesn't walk in the shoes of others? Just my $0.O2, though, feel free to toss it into the dustbin.
349
Lindy West you are my hero! Thank you for a brilliant and beautiful post.
350
it is really mind boggling how many people believe they have a RIGHT to make comments about or otherwise insist that fat people lose weight. why is it that people think that it is OK for them to do that? who the fuck are you?

people have a right to live their lives as they please you are not in charge of other people's bodies! mind your own fucking business and micromanage your own lives! why do you care so much? why do you hate fat people so much? what are you so afraid of?

seriously - i doubt anyone who has insisted that fat people are fat fucking lazy ugly people and all they have to do is this this and this to make everyone else happy lives their lives in 100% perfectly acceptable ways to other people. yet they would never accept anyone else's commentary about their lives the way they feel perfectly comfortable dictating how fat people need to live their lives.

how many people on this comment board smoke cigarettes? drink alcohol? do drugs? drive after drinking alcohol or doing drugs? have unprotected sex? have pre-marital sex? have homosexual sex? have polyamorous sex? are in debt that they can't possibly dig themselves out of? live lives that are lies- pretending to be something they are not? cheat on their spouses? hit their children? rob their employers of productive work hours by calling in sick when they aren't or checking their email or facebook or ebay while at work? lie to people? steal? are racist? are sexist? etc. etc. etc. etc.

none of you want anyone telling you how to live your life. you want people to live you alone and let you live your life. well guess what fat people deserve the same thing. get over yourselves. mind your own fucking business and keep your fat hatred to yourself!
351
I fucking love you, Lindy West.
352
I used to be overweight and I smoked cigarettes. I had a very similar outlook on my habits as you presently do. I saw myself as a victim of two unchangeable conditions. I was addicted to food and cigarettes. The victim mentality is what allows you to project your frustrations outward. I don't feel sorry for you. I changed my life and am in the best shape I've ever been in. Anyone can do it. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and justifying your poor choices. Pick up a piece of fruit, hit the gym, and stop shaking your finger at those of us who had the courage to make a choice contrary to the one you are presently making.
353
Lindy, you are awesome...and sexy!
354
Andrew-And it's people like you that she is FUCKING TALKING ABOUT. JUDGEMENTAL assholes who have nothing better to do that sit around and degrade people. You make me sick.
Oh and you know what tastes even better than doughnuts AND "not being fat"? HAVING SELF RESPECT, MORALS, AND BEING A BETTER PERSON THAN SOME JUDGEMENTAL, CRUEL ASSHOLE?
:)
355
Lindy, you are awesome..and hot!
356
Great article! I think you speak for a lot of people who don't fit the beauty "standard" of today's culture. Thanks
357
I won't rest until there are 1000 comments in this thread!
358
FUCK! YES!
359
@ 348 - 100% agreement. Dan has written about his family history of weight issues multiple times. As usual, your calm reasonable voice is a welcome one in a heated discussion thread.

"It may be possible that his love for others combined with his personal efforts at his physical appearance have blinded him to the idea that his words are hurtful to some? And they may have blocked him from realizing the depth of hurt, and to the realization that he doesn't walk in the shoes of others?"

Not tossing that anywhere. I think it's true.
360
wow. awesome.
361
It has been my experience that tracking calories is a bitch. Wanna know how many calories is in a serving of potato chips? Look on the back of the bag. Wanna know how many calories are in a serving of apple? Go look it up on the internet or something. HISS!
362
Hello, you are amazing.
363
@ 286 -- No disputing that men get judged on factors other than appearances as harshly as women get judged on looks and weight specifically. That's not what I was talking about though, and it has nothing to do with this article. My initial point was that I just feel a lot of pressure to be thin, as do most women. I wasn't comparing the hardships of women and men. But now that you've admitted that women *are* held to greater judgment than men when it comes to looks, I guess you're rescinding your earlier opinion that I was perpetuating a double standard.

So: we agree. Thanks!
364
Thank you! I understand that being overweight is less healthy.. but so are fad diets and over exercising.. so is being seriously depressed and hating yourself. I'm not entirely happy with my body now, but I've birthed two beautiful babies from it and I love my Husband. I could probably work out and lose more weight but whatever free time that I have to spend "working out" is spent with my kids and my family. I'd rather spend an hour doing arts & crafts with my daughter than sticking her in a damn daycare so I can run on a treadmill. She'll thank me some day.
365
Fat does not necessarily mean unhealthy, I'm skinny and I'm in not fantastic shape healthwise. Genetics dictate that some people just vary in size, and that's fine. What bothers me about fat activism in general is just the whole attitude of "there's nothing wrong with me! As a matter of fact what's wrong with you for thinking there's anything wrong with me?" Look, whether you're comfortable with yourself or not, humans are simply not meant to be bigger than a certain size. Period. You should really not be chronicly and grossly overweight, regardless of genetics. And just as a thought experiment, forget about stigma as a social problem and consider it as a residual biological imperative- when I'm a Neanderthal roaming the plains trying to take down an antelope, or defend my settlement from wild animals or whatever, the overweight tribe member is a liability to me.
366
Lindy officially wins the internets. Dan has to do her laundry for a month. And do it RIGHT, damn it, don't just stuff it all in one load.
367
Thank you, Lindy! and AMEN! I love Dan Savage and have been a loyal reader for a long time, but his disconnect with the issues of feminism and fat-phobia sometimes make me wish he would refrain from advising people about stuff he has little understanding of. And while fat phobia is an everybody issue, I consider it to have more of an effect on women in our society. You now what else is really bugging me about some of the comments on this post? I would bet my whole thousand dollar tax return that not one of the people commenting about how it's just laziness, or you need to stop eating cheeseburgers is viceless, just because food may not be a weakness for them doesn't mean they are healthier. It's just like Dan constantly posting about how much he fucking drinks, but bashing smokers and fat people. We all choose our own vices, people.
368
Lindy, you are a BAD ASS MOTHERFUCKER and I love you. Also, I am super jealous of your Lindy brain.
369
Wow. Lindy! I admire your sense of humor, self, and your GARGANTUAN balls.

I don't know if it's possible, but I'd really love to see Dan grow up and admit he's wrong for once. How can he be a champion against bullying when he contributes to the cultural hatred of fat people which, do I even need to say it? Leads to bullying of fat people.
370
Also, @296- you clearly have no understanding of how metabolism works. Yes if you workout a ton you are more hungry and eat more. However because of the consistent increased exercise you will actually be burning more calories at rest than you were before. So you can ear more while working an exercise plan and still lose weight.

If you need an example, consider American farmers in the early 1900's- one always hears about them eating nothing but huge amounts of carbohydrates and salt pork and bacon and tons of eggs, things like that. However, they could do that and stay fit because 70% of the day was spent doing hard manual labor. It balances out.
371
You are SMART, hilarious, and sexy as hell. Go, Lindy, go!
372
As someone who was diagnosed as diabetic at 90 lbs and who is now 230 lbs all the mention of fatness as a cause of diabetes bums me the fuck out. I am fat because I am diabetic, not diabetic because I am fat.

And is it any coincidence that Dan Savage is so fatphobic and openly misogynist? I think not.
373
And as for the whole stupid "airline seat" argument: I am a size 8 and I feel like a goddamn trapped rat when I fly. Those seats aren't the size they are because they are comfortable for the average person. They are the size they are because that's as small as the airlines can make them and still sell seats. It's all about the money, honey.
374
You go, girl!
375
Ah, this makes me sad. Dan and Lindy are both so funny, and savvy, and smart, and making a difference. I'm not even going to jump into the debate--both have valid points, I think--but instead wanted to post something that someone else put up on another blog I read...I thought it seemed like a good thing to pass along:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4sXTS1gno…
376
@348: That's a very charitable view for you to espouse. However, as I mentioned above -- just because someone has an anecdote to share doesn't mean that it should be shared.

Mr. Savage is obviously paid to write blunt advice to people with sexual troubles, but that doesn't mean that he needs to be needlessly cruel. It also doesn't mean he gets to stigmatize, demonize, and de-humanize a group of people because he feels they are unattractive without hearing from others about his behavior.

It's really about politeness. It is unnecessary for anyone, Mr. Savage included, to go out of their way to make other human beings feel worse about who they are.

Perhaps you might understand it differently when I describe it another way. While they certainly have the right to do so, does it make you feel any better when commenters on Slog belittle your religious views -- and you, personally, for espousing them? Does it serve any purpose other than schadenfreude?

If you can understand that, then perhaps you can see where @318 comes from. It is understandably frustrating to receive this kind of torment from someone who is, in most other areas, a great person; more importantly, someone who is usually our ally.
377
@ Vamos-- so perfectly well said! Sooo many things can affect how much a person weighs-- wether someone is eating to shield their grief, pain, or self hate, or if they simply choose to be the weight they are because they are comfortable in their own skin and have come to accept it. Of course there are real metabolic disorders, and folks who simply make bad choices for a myriad of reasons. Truth be told-- people do loose weight, large amounts of it, and keep it off. They do! No one has to.. nor should they be treated poorly for the body they live in. Simply put- that's unkind and unnneccesary. Many people use unkind words as a way to motivate others -- thinking they are helpful by pointing things out and being "truthfull". But I resent the idea that losing weight and keeping it off isn't possible and that we aren't in control of our own health and our bodies. There are choices we make every day and whether they are educated or "right" isn't anyone's right to say. But I think -and this is my opinion- those who believe that "fat" is not a choice don't have all the facts, have given up-which is a choice, or don't choose to search out the reasons for themselves, or simply aren't ready to address their weight, or don't have the desire to--either way they they are entitled to respect. Obesity isn't the same as being a few pounds overweight. It does have health complications and there are risks associated with it. It's not about a number, a dress size, or a socail norm, it's about a risk. Either way I respect you, your opinions, your right to them, and your body, whatever size it is. I'd happily sit next to you in an airplane.
378
You Go Girl!
379
Looks like a super fun body to me, Lindy.

But more importantly, that was fucking brilliant.
380
I'm adding to pile of "Go Girls" - Yay Lindy!! As someone whose weight yo-yo's constantly in the gay community, I'm seriously wondering why it's all worth it. This is just skin in various shapes and sizes, and frankly - the sizes that keep getting pushed and featured aren't really that thrilling. I've been on both ends (*Twink to Bear and back to muscular and then back to bear) and frankly, it's b.s. I'm actually under my ideal body mass and for what? To hate my gut with even more vitriol?
Dan - kindly step out of the All-Twink universe you inhabit and start looking at people with real bodies as not your adversaries.
381
And one more thing I forgot in my above post: I am glad that a few people have made the point that Dan's statement about rolls of fat being unsightly is not a fact, and he should have worded it as his own opinion. I, for one, have never been into skinny girls. People have all kind of theories about what makes me a "chubby chaser", but all I know is that a bigger body is sexier to me.
382
This is great. Bravo Lindy!
383
Quoting from the "Hey, Fat Chick" blog... I felt it was very relevant and pretty much sums up this entire issue completely... And may I add to the overwhelming support here - Lindy, you so ROCK.

"Even if all fat people are the way they are due to their bad choices, even if every single fat person is unhealthy, that does not justify sub-standard treatment. How can the health of strangers possibly inspire such vitriol? If you remain convinced that others’ bodies are your business and that people must justify their existence to you, perhaps you should consider the possibility that you are an arsehole."
385
Dan crows all day long, and rightly so, that pastors and politicians have a hand in the deaths of gay teens who kill themselves. If that is the case, then how can he not see that by contributing to and authorizing fat-bias he has a hand in the mental anguish of chunky kids, both gay and straight. And especially, consider the chunky gay kid, who has EXACTLY ZERO fat gay role models. The gay kid who is taught that there is really one way to look and if you don't fit, your only recourse is to be a part of the leather fetishist/bear community. How isolating, to look out from a rural conservative town and know that even in the big city he won't find a community that views him as normal.

So, yeah. Lindy, this is your It Get's Better Project. If only a fraction of the people who have posted share this with someone, you will in all likely hood save some girl from an eating disorder or encourage some young gay kid to keep the faith.
386
Is this like the most comments EVER for a slog post?

Lindy, you're awesome! Love ya, girl!
387
Lindy, I think that you have earned the title of Queen of Slog. Heading towards 400 posts, baby!
Your writing has made me pee my pants. Your post dampened my face. I've lived this, and as you can see, so many others have.

You fucking rule.
388
@341-- you must have misunderstood my logic. i don't exercise either-- in fact, as a classical musician, i have a pretty sedentary life. however, i also eat probably radically less than the average (more active) person. if i ate typical restaurant size portions every meal while maintaining my current activity level, i would probably be overweight and also in very poor health. the point is, there is no magic formula to achieve a perfect weight or health level. everyone needs to find the equilibrium between eating and activity that allows them to be healthy and not burden their body with excess weight. the same balance won't work for everyone, but it's within everyone's power to adjust their life to be in control of their weight and general health.

finally, i'd just like to point out that i totally approve of 'fat' people accepting and loving their overweight-ness. however, accepting a larger than average size should be viewed as a CHOICE. There are many many people who are overweight and would rather not be, and choosing to embrace overweight-ness also means choosing to embrace a statistically less healthy lifestyle (and potentially a shorter life). It's fine for people to make that decision consciously, but it's simply not OK that as a nation we turn a blind eye to the millions who are unwilling struggling with weight and assoociated health implications
389
Not going to read 383comments to see if someone else said this but: I assumed you were older from your smartsmartsmart writing which I really hope works out to be a compliment and if it doesn't I apologize. Great post! Thank you.
390
Your boobs are huge, so it's all cool.
391
I'm impressed that this thread is nearly 400 comments and no one has yet mentioned the orange extension cord in the photo.

It reminded me of Lowly Worm.

And to make this somewhat related to (fast) food, per the wiki: "About 500,000 Lowly Worm and Huckle Cat finger puppets, distributed by Taco Bell in 1993, were voluntarily recalled by Taco Bell following complaints that the puppets had gotten stuck onto children's tongues."
392
For the record, I've been pointing out that Dan's a bully for years. He wants acceptance for the gays (which I support 110 percent) but spends most of his time putting down and generalizing about fat people, Christians, Southerners, people who live in rural places, etc., etc., etc.

He gets away with it, I guess, because he's Dan Savage. Shame on his bosses, I've always thought.

If only someone would stand up for some of the other groups Dan bullies.
393
I believe Mr. A-Lot spoke the word of truth when he proclaimed:

"I like big butts and I can not lie."

If we are to look at the historical attitudes towards sex appeal wouldn't we be encouraging all these anorexic waifs to chow a burger once in a while?
394
376,

My point was that I disagreed with the hypothesis that Savage was thin due to blessed genes. The rest was just hypothesis about why he sees his own writings as not being hurtful. That is all.

People make fun of me all the time for multiple reasons from being legally blind to what they think are my religious views, etc. There lies the source of my compassion. I know what it is like to be rejected, beaten, and bullied. I have found that while their is a reason for unkindness that does not justify the behavior, understanding the reason why helps address the issue.

In short, I choose to love in the face of unloving behavior. I think love has a greater ability to inspire change than belittling. You may disagree. Feel free to disagree.

Enjoy your weekend.
395
Word to responsible Pit Bull owners: "It Gets Better."
396
THANK you, Lindy! You rock! Am in perfect agreement with you on every point, and I would like to add that men who demean women for not fitting into their ideal of the 'perfect' woman by calling them lazy, &c. need to understand that men's experiences with weight loss are not the same as women's experiences with it.

As for me, I'm still working on trying to live a healthier life because I want to live longer, but I would give anything to have come to love my body the way you have. The battle continues. Three cheers for our standard-bearer!
397
I sincerely agree. I'm honestly so tired of hating everything about my appearance. And to be honest, I'm pretty sure that if I were thinner, I would still have been uncomfortable with it. I want to be proud of who I am. No, I'm not perfect, and no amount of exercise will change that. I've been there. I've dedicated my entire days to health and fitness. I worked out religiously, hardly ate anything. And yes, I did lose some weight, but I was fucking miserable. It wasn't a life. It was a prison sentence. I never want to live like that again. I never want to have all my thoughts revolve around how many calories I've taken in and how many sit ups I'll have to do when I get home to undo that turkey sandwich I ate earlier. So maybe I won't ever be a size 8, but at the same time, I'm not a fucking cow. I don't have diabetes. I have a normal blood pressure, and have never even been to the doctor. I'm going to be proud of myself, and of the beautiful person I am, inside and out.
398
Thank you Kim. Reading your comments is a gentle reminder to me that one can be gracious in disagreement, and that in the end, it's best to employ compassion (for self and others) and empathy. I'm a big Savage fan but could never understand what I determined to be a huge disconnect in his personal opinions of fat people. It led me to believe that he simply had a mean streak. This may very well be the truth, but I appreciate your view that it may be something else. That's not to say that what he says on the topic isn't hurtful, self-defeating and harmful, just that perhaps there is perhaps another (maybe kinder?) reason for him saying these things other than a part of him being a vicious cunt.
399
"OOPS I JUST YAWNED TO DEATH."
YES. x1000. People who obsess about weight (their own or other people's) are just betraying the fact that they have nothing in their lives that is actually worthwhile and interesting.

Thanks for writing this. I don't care about your body, as long as you keep carrying that fucking gorgeous brain.
400
This is one of the best things I've read; funny, clear, backed up by evidence. I only hope it does something to get him to feel less comfortable being so judgmental. With a huge following there's no real incentive for him or his editors to change and certainly censorship is out of the question, it would take a change in character. Thanks for this.
401
This was the most dishonest post I've ever seen Lindy write. Period.

In no way, in Dan's original post, was he ragging on fat people. He was saying that banning gay marriage was as senseless as trying to ban marriage between two obese people (If you were to use the "unhealthy" argument the republicans were using). That Lindy took offense to that, and completely (weirdly) internalized it as some swipe at her is just crazy.

Has Dan EVER come up to you in the office Lindy and looked right at you and said, "I think you are fat."?

Ahem.... Waiting for the answer.... Really? Never?

So you are just assuming that he thinks you are fat because he writes about the completely unhealthy eating habits of a large portion of the American public? And because you perceive yourself as fat, you go on a tear at him about this?

And for proof that he hates fat people you use a chapter from "Skipping Towards Gomorrah", in which he goes to the NAAFA convention? (NAAFA stands for National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance.) A convention of extremely obese women riding around in scooters because they have lost the will or ability to walk anymore, because they weigh upwards of 500 lbs.

C'mon Lindy. You read the whole chapter, didn't you? Be honest. Any swipe at fat acceptance in that chapter was completely warranted by the attitudes of the women at that convention.

And you use a SL letter in which SOMEONE ELSE tells fat women to stop wearing tight low hung jeans as proof that Dan hates fat women. Dan even says, "pointing out that something isn't flattering isn't the same thing as saying that the person wearing the unflattering garment is unattractive".

And a post about kids drinking three cans of soda FOR BREAKFAST?!?!?! Guess what Lindy? That's unhealthy!!! (and disgusting.)

And to finish it off, you use a song by Tim Minchin!?! The comedian? I thought you LOVED comedians?!? (btw I hear he's coming to Sasquatch! Will you be there to protest?) He sings about all the excuses large people make, then not only do you go on to make some of those excuses yourself (as do many readers in these comments), but the very next post on this blog is your review of various hamburgers.

Really? That is your evidence that Dan hates fat people?!?

If anything I see Dan is concerned about the general health of the public at large (and very large). In the same way we all want Obama's Health Care plan to work, we also want all Americans to chip in and do their part. Not just pay taxes, but eat healthier and exercise a little more. In the end it helps you live longer and keeps health care costs down (for EVERYONE). Why wouldn't any rational person want that?

That pointing that out is a personal offense against Lindy West so, "Stop It!!!" is down right silly, petulant and dishonest to yourself and your readers.

The reason he used obese people as an example is because there is ample evidence that the harm they do to themselves is REAL and the harm obese parents do to their children through bad eating and social habits is REAL.

But, you know, you've always had a way of making every post, every movie review, every hamburger review all about Lindy. And for the most part it's always been funny. So why not start making all your coworkers posts about you too?

You lost me on this one. Dishonest, deceitful, unfair, and frankly unethical.

He doesn't hate fat people, he hates a culture which has lead to unhealthy eating habits and obese children and parents, shoving corn syrup, starches and carbs down people's throats as a cheap and easy way to feed your family.

He's right. You're crazy.
402
Lindy West is punk rock. <3
403
400?

    Please wait...

    Comments are closed.

    Commenting on this item is available only to members of the site. You can sign in here or create an account here.


    Add a comment
    Preview

    By posting this comment, you are agreeing to our Terms of Use.